Never A Happily Ever After || ForthBeam FF

1

Beam POV

TW: Abuse

Loneliness is defined as being empty, unwanted, and unimportant. 

I am empty, unwanted, and unimportant.

Since I was young my, life had never been that easy. I know a lot of people say that, but for me it was really true. 

My mother left this world just as I was fully entering it. Due to this, my father and older brother blamed me for it to the point it would become a tradition to go to school most days with bruises all over my body, sometimes even a broken bone or something similar. 

Now that I'm twenty-one the bruises have stopped, but the pain will always remain. It may not be physical anymore, but I still feel it mentally.

I'm now in my third year of college as a medical student. I had worked most of my life, trying my hardest to get where I am now. Graduation is next year and I decided that I was going to become an obstetrician, to help women bring their babies into the world.

I had closed myself off to most people, though, for what I felt like was my sake and theirs. Because of this I only really had four friends. Two that I had known since before high school.

Phana and Kit.

They've been by my side since as long as I can remember. In more ways than one with them being medical students with me. 

Wayo and Ming, my other two friends, are Phana and Kit's boyfriends.

The five of us sat at one of the tables in the canteen. Phana, Kit, and I studying, while Wayo and Ming gossiped quietly about who knows what.

Out of the quietness came Kit's loud and deep sigh. "I still don't get it. Why wasn't he bed blocking?" 

I sighed along with him and rubbed the bridge of my nose.

"He was. He was sent to a care home." I explained.

"Oh." Kit read over the file again before groaning. "I should have known." He looked to me with a desperate expression. "I'm going to fail this exam, aren't I?" 

I nodded silently.

"Oh, baby." Ming chuckled and rubbing Kit's back softly. "It's just one exam. You did well on all of the past ones, so I am confident that you're going to do well on this one as well. I promise." He leaned down to place a soft kiss on Kit's cheek.

Kit sighed and sat up right in his seat. His bottom lip was pushed out in a pout, making Ming chuckle again and kiss him again, on the lips this time around. 

I rolled my eyes before turning back to look at my own notes. I didn't get very far, though, when Phana called me, making me look back up.

His arm was slung over Wayo's shoulder and Wayo was leaning into his side. 

I think part of me would be lying if I said I didn't want that, but the other, more rational, part of me wouldn't be.

Ming's friends invited us to go drinking with them at a new bar downtown. I know you don't really like going out, but please come with us tonight." 

I laughed softly and shook my head.

"You know I have-"

"To study." Phana and Kit retorted in unison, finishing my sentence for me.

"We know. You always study." Phana commented. "Why not take a break? Have fun. Then you can go back to studying." He rested his right hand over his heart and raised his left one in the air. "Promise." He added.