Before She Even Knows

Chapter 44 - What do you want me to say?

"What the hell was that?"

I ask him harshly, as soon as we reach the backyard.

I see a few people looking at him with a quizzical look as they start whispering. I'm sure they are wondering why the Noah Allen looks so pissed, as they probably didn't see what happened inside.

Don't worry, someone will text them about it.

Get a life, people. Just... get a life.

He halts and turns to face me, his eyes darker than ever. I put my hands on my hips ready to argue, but instead of saying anything, I wait for him to answer.

"You tell me Emma, what the fuck were you thinking?" He starts pacing from one side to the other and tugs at his hair with a bit too much force.

"You can't be serious. You just broke a guy's nose, for christ sake. Why would you do that?''

Well, technically, I was dancing on the table on purpose to get him to react, but I wasn't expecting him to even care, let alone start a fight. I never thought he was even capable of it, he's too polite for that.

He's the type that would hire someone to do it on his behalf.

''You broke up with me, you were all over that girl, not to mention you with Diana and now you want to act like you care about me. What's wrong with you?" I continue, practically screaming, as he doesn't answer me.

I'm insanely mad, like I've never been before. I'm also confused, very confused.

"You don't know what you're talking about." He gives me a pointed look. He keeps saying that, but it doesn't mean anything.

I've wanted to have this conversation since he said he didn't want to be with me anymore, so I'll take the courage I currently have, to tell him what I want.

We're both so angry, that this might be the last time we actually talk, so I have to take the chance, right?

My heart aches with the possibility that we might not talk again. My heart doesn't want us to be over.

Sorry buddy, but it's not our choice to make.

"You know what? You're right. I don't know what I'm talking about, because you didn't tell me. When you break up with someone, you should at least explain them why Noah, because what's hurting like hell is to know that I wasn't even worth an explanation."

His eyes dart to me again and his expression soften a little. For the first time I see what I think is regret on his face, but I'm not having it.

"It's hard to explain." His hand goes through his hair one more time.

"Try me." I cross my arms over my chest in a challenging way. I'm breathing heavily, but it's just my way to try to calm my nerves.

"You don't understand Emma, I'm doing this for yo--" I don't let him finish. I can't take this pity bullshit. Doing it for me? Like hell he is.

"Well, guess what, I'm doing this for me too. So, if you excuse me, I'm young, I'm single and I'll go back inside to have fun."

Suddenly, I just want to leave. I wanted to talk, but instead of taking the chance as I said I would, my bad judgement takes the best of me.

I think he gets what I mean, because his face turns pale and his eyes go wide.

I turn my back and start walking away from him, but he grabs my arm and pulls me to his chest. I didn't do my best to stop him to be honest.

"Don't even think about it."

My heart starts beating fast with his proximity, his minty breath on my face, but I pull my arm, releasing it from his grip and I walk away.