Chapter XIII

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You always find the rain in rainbows

and I thought that you were safe, but all your cracks showed

And I could wear that dress, you won't look your best

I could get undressed, you'd still look depressed

It's all too much, you're so cold to touch

You don't open up, you don't open up

Your kisses are not what I wanted

Your kisses are not what I crave

Your kisses may be a beautiful art

But all I ever wanted was your heart

Right from the start

You only look into my eyes when I've been cryin'

to see if the tears that you have made are slowly dryin'

Oh, but even if they've dried, it don't mean that I'm feelin ok 'cause I'm still sad inside

(Her kisses - Daughter)

Emily traced her steps back to her apartment. Her hair was left on a mess, her clothes still haphazardly on. Her arms were folded against her chest as she dragged her feet going back to the apartment. Her eyes and body felt sore, her hands felt numb. Her heavy footsteps echoed as she tried to find the strength to climb the stairs. She held on to the railings for support, but even that was not enough. The 10-min walk from the parking lot felt more like 10 hrs.

Step one... Walk forward.

Step two... Breathe.

Step three... Forget her.

Step four... Stop hearing her voice.

Step five... Don't cry.

Step six... You don't love her.

Step seven... Keep walking.

Step eight... Did it really happen.

Step nine... Open the damn door.

Step ten...

Emily found Mrs Fields sitting at the dining room talking to Spencer and Aria over Skype video call. She immediately bid the girls goodbye and walked towards Emily. Feeling weak, Emily just nodded when Mrs. Fields asked her if she would like to go to her bedroom.

"Did you go out for a drive?" Mrs. Fields asked rhetorically.

"Why did you bring her here?" Emily asked, eyes closed, her upper half body lied on the bed while her feet sat on the floor.

Mrs. Fields looked for answers inwardly, yet all she could come up with was, "she called earlier and asked for my help to see you."

"Great. She has no troubles finding you but me," Emily replied sourly.

"It's not like that, Emmy."

"What do you mean?" Emily asked, exhausted, feeling as if every word she utters takes too much energy.

"You should rest, Emmy. We can talk tomorrow."

With a heavy sigh, Mrs. Fields lifted both Emily's feet to the bed and covered Emily's weary body with a blanket. She has the answers perhaps to all of Emily's questions however she's beginning to understand now that having the answers don't always lead to understanding.

The day after, Mrs. Fields called in sick for Emily at the Brew and decided to rebook her ticket back to Texas to Wednesday, almost 3 days after her original flight.

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