Perfectly Fake ✓

08: elf and Grinch

.w a r n i n g.

-rape

-suicide

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08

Two Weeks Later

MATIAS GRUNTED, FACE barely concealing his disgust as he got off me and left the room wordlessly.

"See?" A cold hand stroked my hair before she captured my lips in a bruising kiss. "Even Matias doesn't like what you make him do."

I looked at the ceiling blankly, jaw clamped shut. Maybe I wasn't even sure whether it was to make her see how angry I was or if it was to keep in my screams of pain.

It was unfair.

She was unfair.

"Are you going to leave me again?" She murmured. I didn't answer as usual. I had stopped after the fourth time. She hurt me either way so what was the fucking point? She looked into my eyes, pouting. "I wanted us to make love but Matias took all your energy didn't he?" She sighed, closing her eyes and resting her head on my chest. "Tomorrow, maybe. I don't want you passing out again..."

Her hand travelled down to my crotch, making me squeeze my eyes shut.

Don't...

"It's so hot watching you and Matias. I can do it all day if you allow me, baby."

I didn't even realise what I was doing until I had her pinned to the bed, my hands around her throat as she struggled, a pissed off expression on her face. Hands grabbed me roughly from behind but I didn't let go.

She had to die.

Then and only then I would die peacefully.

When a sharp sting spread across my neck, I realised it wouldn't be possible. I still didn't let go, even as my grip loosened and she smiled, caressing my cheek as my eyes slid shut.

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I woke up to unimaginable pain. My surroundings were blurry as I tried to make sense of them.  Someone breathed heavily on top of me, making bile rise up in my throat. It won't be the first time I would wake up to Matias on top of me-

However, it was not Matias this time.

It was that asshole who had slammed me into the car seat and...

"Look at those eyes..." He smirked. "Fuck, am I in heaven?" He grunted, hoisting my legs further up.

I gave up then. It didn't matter that she was watching. It didn't matter that Matias was standing by the door like a loyal guard. Nothing mattered.

Life did not matter anymore.

"That's enough!" Amara said after a while, making him pull out as blood flooded out of my body.

I couldn't even feel the pain anymore. But I liked this numbness.

"Matias-"

"I want to take a shower by myself..." I interrupted her before she could ask that asshole to pick me up and give me a bath.

Fucking scums.

She smiled, coming forward to give me a kiss.

"Okay, baby."

.

.

I filled the tub with freezing water before going inside, chuckling at the elf shower gel and Grinch shampoo. She gave it to me on the second day because she said she wanted to spoil me. There was really no need to be completely honest.

The brutal rapes made up for everything.

But who could argue with her?

I picked up the red razor. She liked smooth bodies. I looked down at my wrists.

They were very smooth.

Thin too.

Food was rarely given because I was never good. And bad boys did not get fed.

I made a long slit and watched as the blood struggled to mix with the cold water. It looked really pretty. So red. I made another slit. That looked even prettier. So I made another...

Then another.

I was having more fun than I had in so long. Why didn't I do this before?

Dumb boy.

This is why you get hurt.

Because you're so fucking stupid.

I thought about Rose as I sat in the tub. Her sad eyes and her sad smile. How pretty. Prettier than the blood that was mixing with water. Would I meet Isla soon now? I wonder if she'd still have bruises.

Hopefully not.

Maybe she'd be reunited with the man she loved. He slit his wrists as well after her death. Maybe we would bond.

Or maybe not.

Maybe God would send me to hell because I am tainted. Not completely a victim. Not completely a perpetrator. I could have told...Lucas about Amara. He was not afraid to stand up to abusive women.

He would have saved me.

I never wanted Rose to know. She was already trying so damn hard to fulfil someone else's dreams. The saddest, prettiest girl I knew. And I wanted to give her nothing but happiness. She knew something was wrong. I wondered if she was worried.

I did not want her to worry.

Maybe Isaiah could help her after I was gone. I knew he was holding back because of me. He was a good brother.

All of my brothers were good. And my parents too. I wish they'd take a break from work sometimes. Elijah missed them.

The sound of door opening and a shrill scream broke me out of my thoughts as I looked up from my hands. I smiled at her horror-stricken face.

I guess she was mad because I had ruined my skin. It was not smooth anymore. Oh, and perhaps because I was dying.

"Matias!

I closed my eyes then, not wanting to see any more of their faces. They couldn't hurt me now.

I was free.

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