Shrekigi

Love.

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Hey Shrekigi fan base. Im a lazy mother fucker so i made a friend write this chapter. Once you reach the end of this chapter you better fucking vote💛💛💛
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I woke up in my bed beside Fiona. The sight of her face almost led to me vomiting. Her oversized forehead glares even without light.

The air from our ceiling fan brushed her nostril hairs back and forth. It looked as if they were waving at me.

I kept telling her to shave her nose bushes but she constantly got offended. I didn't dare tell her again. It wasn't worth it, all she did was push my opinions to the side.
I want to leave her so badly, yet i dont want to hurt her. Donkey told me that Fiona was very sensitive. I didn't want to hurt her like her other 500 boyfriends had. She opened her crusty, eye booger infested eyes, slowly waking up.

"Shrek..what are you doing up so early?"

I didn't know what to say. I wanted to tell her how much I wanted to leave her but I couldn't.

"Shrek you seem stressed."

She placed her thicc green fingers against my cheek.

"Tell me anything, I love you so much..I'm always here for you."

I didn't want to hurt her but as I opened my mouth, the words couldn't help but come out.

"Fiona..I don't want to do this anymore.."

Fiona laughed at me.

"Oh shrek! Your so funny! You're always such a jokester baby ogrepie."

"I'm serious Fiona."

Fiona laughed once more.

"Oh shrek! Your so f-"

"HOW COME YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! I DON'T WANNA BE WITH YOUR HOE ASS!"

Fiona got up and turned around. I stared at her hairy ass back.

"Shrek why.."

I sighed, biting my lip.

"I just don't like you anymore..the spark left...I think it's time to move on.."

She started crying.

She turned and dropped down to her knees before me.

"SHREK PLEASE!"

She used her hair to blow her nose. I cringed in disgust.

"Oh don't you dare look at me like that! You'll never find a women like me!"

I mumbled under my breath.

"No man is ever going to deal with your bullcrap like I did.."

She gave me a glare of anger.

"Oh yah! Nobody is ever gonna deal with your onion smell!"

"Fiona...I don't smell like that..you do.."

She blushed in embarrassment.

"Leave!"

"Fiona calm-"

"LEAVE!"

I walked out the house leaving all my things behind.

It was raining, it set up quite a mood for a breakup.

I cried, but not from sadness,these were tears of relief and freedom.

I kept saying "Just keep breathing."

I will be okay.

I had nowhere to live now. All that was on the street was a Bravo supermarket. I went inside to see of I could get some food with the fifty dollars I had in my pocket.