Chapter 37

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"Aris is missing! Where the shuck did the bastard go?" Minho screams, waking me up.

"Shhh you're gonna wake everyone up!" Newt whispers angrily, "if he wants to go back he can go back. I don't want him here anyway, bloody traitor." He mumbles the last part to himself.

"He's helping us." I grumble incoherently as I try to stay awake, wiping my eyes of sleep.

"What do you mean he's helping us?"

"I saw him leaving last night so I followed him-"

"You bloody what!" Newt interrupts, anger taking over his features as he looks at me worriedly.

I roll my eyes, "Just listen. He's gonna talk to them and I know they're gonna listen for the same reason I told you. They know we need each other guys and Wicked isn't going to kill us one day after them saving me, it'd be pointless. Aris thinks they're keeping things from us and I have reason to believe that he's on to something."

"You seriously believe that shuck face?" Minho asks in disbelief while the other gladers stare at us in confusion. They still don't know why the three boys have an immense hatred towards the kid. They don't trust him, but hate would be a strong word for someone they don't even know.

"Yeah I really do."

"You might be even crazier than the Cranks." Frypan sighs, "but like we said, we'll follow you."

"I don't want anyone to follow me. I want people to do what they think is right. We've been told what to do all our lives, we don't need another leader. It's time we start making our own decisions."

"And our decision is to stay together. Not only to survive, but to fight for our freedom. From there we don't know." The boy who gave me the knife back in the club adds, nodding his head at me.

I nod back at him a small smile playing on my face while newt stares blankly at the ground, his face void of emotion. Brenda is staring at me, a spark of something in her eyes.

"So what do we do exactly?" The same boy chuckles.

"We go to the safe haven and we get out of this god forsaken place."

"I like the sound of that." Minho grins from ear to ear, stretching his muscles along with the others who prepare for the last day of our journey. It's gone by so fast and it's all been extremely torturous.

Looking at Brenda again I meet her eyes. I remember what she said. Taking over wicked is impossible, but I have to try. And by the look in her eyes I can tell that she wants to help. Is a small speech the way to create an army. And is an army and peoples lives something that I want on my hands. If we kill wicked no one gets the cure and we'll all have to face the inevitable. But we don't know what's gonna happen if they stand, and that's not a future that I want to risk.

Newt walks briskly beside me, his arm brushing against mine as we make our way to the top of these rocky pathways.

I kick a rock at the silence, grabbing his attention.

He sighs being the first to speak, "I don't like it."

"I know I'm sorry I would have told you I was going to follow Aris but then you wouldn't have let me go and I know you're not particularly fond of him but I just thought that he needed-"

"No Carly, not that. Like you said you're allowed to make your own decisions although I'd prefer that you didn't make reckless ones like that. And you're right I do hate him and I always will, I'm not mad that you're too forgiving of a person. It's one of your best qualities actually."

"So?" I urge, begging him to continue as we walk hand in hand down the mountain, relived that the walk will be a breeze from this point on.

"I don't want you to be a part of the rebellion."

"The rebellion was my idea Newt. It would be hypocritical of me if I didn't at least participate. I can't always stand on the sidelines."

"You don't always have to be the hero either." He growls.

"I'm not. We are. We all are. By fighting for ourselves, our own freedom." I'm getting angry now but I can't tell why.

"Why can't we just get the cure and be done with it. I'm sure you're right about the lying part so we'll escape and just live in this world terrible as it is." He squeezes my hand at the thought.

"And leave everyone else who's being neglected out here? And what about everyone who's being abused inside? Don't you see? We tried to escape before the Maze, there's no chance we can get out now without any of our memories of the place, even with Thomas."

He doesn't say anything for a while as he ponders what I said. He must come to the conclusion that I'm right because he says, "You can't save everyone."

"But I can try." I whisper.

At this he stops, "Carly I want you to promise me something. And actually promise me this. Don't put yourself in danger. If you want to lead this rebellion then fine, I'm with you in every step. But if it comes down to you or someone else, or you and me even, please for the love of god, please save yourself. Okay?"

My heart stops beating, "I can promise that if it's someone else, but not for you." I choke on my breath.

"Even for me!" He growls again.

"Would you leave me to die? Cause this is the same thing!" I breathe heavily, awaiting his answer.

"Carly this is different and you know it."

I gasp internally as I look at his solemn expression. This breaks him and I didn't realize it. He's been broken one too many times. This could be his final straw. Everything I do hurts Newt in a way. Every time I put my self in danger it kills him in someway. For his sanity I promise him. For him I'll live.

"I promise." I say strongly, wanting to believe that I said it myself.

He looks at me shocked that I finally agreed to something but relaxes, "Thank you."

I store mentally in my head the time when he promised he'd never leave me. I'll save myself, but if he leaves me, I can't guarantee anything.

"Look! We're almost there!" Minho screams practically blinding down the hillside where Group B stands in a circle. Thomas is there too standing opposite of Teresa who looks sad as she stares at the dirt. Thomas looks beat up, and I grow angry at the feeling, but he's otherwise unharmed.

The girls acknowledge us but don't attack like I expected. I nod my head in thank you at Aris as we pass by, making my way over to Thomas and embarrassing him in my arms. He squeezes me back tightly.

"I missed you so much." He says earnestly.

"I did too. I was so worried." I breathed.

"Are you guys alright?" He looks between newt and I and then the rest of the gladers.

"Yeah we had the best babysitter," I point to Minho, "but don't even act like that was something on your mind during all of this."

"It was one of them. Your always one of the things on my mind Carly among others, I'm your brother for shucks sake."

I smile, "It's good to have you back. Can we stop separating?"

"Agreed." He chuckles under his breath.

I let him go slowly to take a look at our surroundings. Everyone is staring at the ground. I look too.

A single flag flaps in the wind.

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