This Might Hurt A Little-A Dallas Winston Fanfiction

Love Loss & Legacy

Two persons cannot be long friends if they cannot forgive each other for little failings.-Jean De La Bruyere

The rest of the day was filled with Soda and Dallas sending harsh remarks towards Ashton, Johnny and Ponyboy trying to hopelessly lighten the mood, and Steve and I glaring at each other. The boys started arguing about what they wanted to do for the night so, I took that as my chance to talk to Ashton alone. We walked out into the front yard, I didn't want the argument that I knew was coming to happen in front of everyone else.

"Whatever you have to say, just say it." I huffed, turning towards him.

"I can't believe you're actually staying here for these guys." He looked at me incredulously. 

"You don't get it, Ash."

Ashton and I had been best friends back in Whitewater, practically inseparable. But I had moved on. The gang was my family now.

"Clearly." Throughout the course of the day, somehow an icy distance between Ashton and I formed. He had showed up expecting me to be the same girl I was a year ago and for everything to be okay but, I had changed and so had he. 

"I love them Ashton. I can't just abandon them!"

He tugged at his hair, frustrated, "They're hoods, Scarlett! They're nobody's! In 5 years I could come back here and they'll still be sitting in that same damn living room having the same damn arguments as they are now. People like that don't go places. You know it and I know it."

If I would have believed that, it would have driven me insane. I had to believe that they were going to get out of Tulsa. Get to something better.

I shook my head, "You don't know them.'

"I don't need to know them. You're getting messed up in this business and you don't even realize what it's done to you." For the first time in our lives, he was staring at me like he didn't understand me.

"How would you know? We haven't seen each other in over a year!"

He took an angry step towards me, his shoe's further crushing broken glass, "Because you didn't answer one of my letters or phone calls! You left and you couldn't even bother to answer a damn letter because, you were too busy becoming some gangs whore."

I don't remember what happened next very clearly. I just remember screaming at him to leave and him doing just that. In movies and books, they always tell you that having a friend die is one of the worst hurts in the world but, I swear a friend walking away feels just the same.  The next thing I remember is Ponyboy coming and sitting next to me on his porch, not putting an arm around me or anything, just sitting. 

"He left, didn't he?" He offered me a cigarette from his coat jacket.

I'd never smoked before and I wasn't going to start then, even in my state. "Yeah, he did."

"Why?"

"You know why, Ponyboy. This isn't really his scene."

"It's not yours either." He pointed out.

I didn't have anything to say to that so, we just sat in silence, watching the little kids pedal past furiously on their bikes and the sky change from blue to purple to pink. That night made it easy for me to understand why Ponyboy loved sunsets so much. There was just something peaceful about that blue sky changing colors.

Soda came out after the sun had completely tucked itself behind the trees, "Come on, baby."

I started to stand up but, he scooped me up in his arms before I even had the chance to get to my feet. Soda is the type of boyfriend that you see in movies. He'll buy you flowers, and sing a song outside your window in the rain and stay by your side even if your parents hate him. He's just that kind of guy. Two-Bit and Steve had taken off, gone out through the back door I suppose, so only Dallas, Johnny, and Darry were sitting inside. Soda sat me down on the couch, putting my head in his lap, with his fingers combing through my tangled hair, and whispering things to me, while Johnny, Dallas, and Darry acted like we weren't there. 

I dozed off so, I don't remember how long we kept laying there, I just remember Soda trying to pick me up without waking me, which failed.

"We're off to bed, Scar." He looked down at me, giving me a small smile.

I had the feeling that he was feeling bad about what happened with Ashton and being the way he was all day. He was walking up the stairs when I heard Dallas's voice speak up, "Scarlett, if it makes you feel better, you dodged a bullet."

It didn't make me feel better.

I wish I could say that I saw Ashton again but, I never did and I still haven't. Maybe I'll get up the nerves to go visit Whitewater and see him sometime. But, things changed after our argument that day.  Things always change, whether you want them to or not.