Chapter 1

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Selena POV

*

"Babe!" Tyreek came up the stairs to check on me. He stood in the doorway of my bedroom. "We're all loading up to go visit Sophia in the hospital. You ready?"

"Almost," I mumbled putting my hair up. Summer was supposed to be about fun and freedom. I had so many things I wanted to do but they all got pushed back. After the shootout in the beginning of the summer Sophia fell into a coma. It's hard staying strong when any day now you could lose a loved one.

"It's okay," Tyreek said coming up to hug me. I looked at myself in the mirror. How I feel is reflected in how I look. Eyes heavy, face droopy, hair a mess. By far the worst three months of my life. I started thinking about the times I had with Sophia. Memories of us together. I remember us playing house together in the playroom papi designed for us. All the times we played in the trampoline basement. When I was riding my bike and fell Sophia ran all the way to daddy and Maria for help. All the talks we had about how mean our bitch of a mother was. Us choosing who was the cutest in the group. My eyes started watering just thinking about that just being memories. "I'm ready," my voice broke. He hugged me tighter. I let a few tears fall. "It hurts."

"I know baby," he whispered. "Just be strong. Sophia is fighting for her life. She hasn't lost. Don't lose faith okay?" I nodded. Be strong for everyone today.

Dallas POV

*

Damn this doesn't seem real. It feels like a dark cloud fell over all of us. Any and all plans for the summer were cancelled when Sophia fell into a coma. The doctors aren't sure if she's going to make it. The main reason they hadn't pulled the plug yet is because of Jay. We're praying every day that she wakes up. We're going to visit her in the hospital for a little while today and then we have to get back to business. Santi and I were already dressed. "Just wait here okay little man?"

"Yes daddy," he said eating some animal crackers. I sat him in front of the TV.

I went to go check on Maria. She was in the bathroom taking her medicine. Jay said it was best to get her back on medication because of the condition she was in after Sophia. Her mood had been all over the place when Sophia fell into a coma. It was okay at first but once the hospital began talking about pulling the plug she flipped out. It wasn't until she almost hurt Santi that she became serious about her medication. "Maria?" I have to admit. I miss the old her. I can see why she never liked taking her medicine before. She seems so...dead.

"Yeah?" she looked at me.

"You okay ma?" she nodded but looked down. I hugged her. "It's okay to cry you know. You don't have to be strong all the time."

"I can't stop being strong now. As of right now I'm all Selena has and if she sees I'm crying then she'll think I gave up. I can't do that," she mumbled before pulling away. "We have to go." She grabbed her stuff and started walking out. I sighed.

"Mommy!" Santi handed for her. Maria looked like she wanted to pick him up but was too scared to do it. She's been real distance with him ever since she almost hurt him. I picked him up.

Maria POV

*

The last thing I ever thought was us being here. I never even played with the idea of coming this close to losing one of my sisters. I've given up almost everything to ensure their safety and it's like all that was in vein. I'm on constant edge that this day would be the day I have to bury someone else. That I close the casket on another family member way too soon. I thought I could handle any stress life throws my way but obviously not.

When the doctors began talking of pulling the plug I flipped. They claimed it's a better option for her. Her chances of waking up maybe around forty percent but they were saying she'd have a long road to recovery. The possibility of her being paralyzed from the waist down is a high probability and then there's also the possibility of her being disabled for the rest of her life. They said there's really only two roads for her to take if she does wake up. Full or nearly full brain recovery but being confined to a wheelchair for the rest of her life. And then there's living with unpredictable permanent brain damage. Parts of her would never recover or be the same. It pissed me off that they think they know what's best for my sister.

My mood swings went wild and I almost ended up hurting Santi. For the safety of my child I began taking my medication regularly. The medicine doesn't just keep me calm but it kind of washes away emotions. Like if I wanted to be happy I couldn't feel happy. I always felt like a zombie when I took this medicine. Which is why I hated taking it.

I started thinking about all the times I had with Sophia. I was there for her through puberty, awkward years, through the death of our papi, through the war that made us lose everything. I was her mother, friend, bodyguard, sister, everything. I promised papi I'd take care of everything and everybody but I couldn't do that. Every decision I make always ended up being the wrong one. I thought I finally made the right decision but I didn't. I just keep putting us into more and more shit. Even though I can feel the pain in my chest, I can't cry and it sucks because I think that's what I need right now and I can't do it with this medicine in my system.

Box POV

*

Another day of this. Another day wasting away in this hospital room on pins and needles. Clinging to the hope that she'll wake up but also fearing she never would. Today wasn't about me or any of us. But I can't help but think of the short time I had with Sophia. We were dating only a few short months. Could've had a lot of memories with her if I wasn't so scared of giving up the 'good' life. Life wasn't good until Sophia. Now, life is just shitty. I had so many plans for us this summer. I wanted Sophia to be the happiest she's ever been. I wanted to create lots of memories with her. I still cling to the hope that one day we will but at the same time I fear that one day we'll never be able to. I know it's not my fault but I can't help but feel like it is.

If I had remembered to bring Santi his gifts in the first place she never would've had to. If I had went to the car instead she wouldn't have been in this situation. I've been shot before so I know I could've handled a bullet or two. I know she's not dead but seeing her lying still, barely breathing, makes my mind do tricks. I know that all it takes is one wrong move and she's gone just like that. We've only been together a short few months but if she dies, I don't think I'll be able to handle that kind of heartbreak. 

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