Through Chaos and Order | Shota Aizawa

Eight

A few days ago, I could praise myself with the fact that I've never killed anyone before.

Such a strange thing to praise yourself over, but you'd be surprised how often heroes themselves do the same thing, especially if they have a severe and damaging quirk such as my Chaos.

Typically, when such a thing happens in movies or tv shows, the individual who committed the killing, no matter the situation, learns to get over it quickly, especially if it was in self-defense.

But this isn't fiction. This was reality, and I simply did not have a strong enough conscience to accept the fact that I did in fact kill someone, even if I was the one who was in danger.

For as long as I remember, I tried to push down Chaos and limit my madness, but that evening, I failed miserably.

And so, as my eyes began to flutter awake, and my mind became active to genuine thoughts, one can easily guess why my body decided to panic as soon as I could move.

I shot upwards from the infirmary bed with a shout, anxiety filling my frame upon recalling the nights events.

"Amora," an elderly voice called. Soon, my grandmother revealed her small self and approached me, immediately embracing me in attenpt to calm said uneasiness. "You're safe, it's alright."

Though, we weren't close, my grandmother was someone I knew I could put my undivided trust into, therefore, with that comforting atmosphere, I broke down right in front of her, needing to release my emotions. For many minutes, I cried into her shoulder, as she stayed still to accept it.

As I began to run out of tears, she separated herself from me, "Do you think you can talk about it?" She asked, raising her petite hand to push hair out of my face, and wiping away the tears with her thumb.

With a final sniffle, I looked to the ground, asking, ". . . What happened? Why am I here?" I did not recall the events that happened after Shouta picked me up.

"Not long after everything, well, happened, you went into shock. Mr. Aizawa brought you here."

Thinking for a moment, I eventually nodded weakly. Soon enough, though, tears were brought back to my eyes due to the fact that I simply could not stop thinking about what I've done.

"Take this," my grandmother said after a moment of gathering some things. In one hand were two pills, and in the other was a glass of water. I looked at her. "I can not heal emotional distress, nor can you to yourself, at least. Take these, it will calm your nerves and stabilize your blood pressure. They should pacify your dark stance for the meantime as well."

I took them from her, popping them into my mouth and drinking them down as she writes something on a note pad. After a minute, she looked upward, staring at the wall with sympathy. She was hesitating.

"What is it," I asked.

She waited a moment before ushering to the window. Slowly standing, I walked over, gazing out.

Dozens of people and reporters surrounded the school entrance. U.A security was pushing the crowd back and away from the crime scene, even though it technically wasn't a crime.

A few teachers stood by the doors to help prevent forced entry. The small group included Shouta and Hizashi. They both looked extremely exhausted and hungover.

"They need a statement from you," She said sympathetically, hating that this was forced on me and knowing it was probably too soon to discuss. "Nezu is on his way with a few of his most trusted men to record your statement."