Adicción Al Amor ~ Aarmau AU

~I Love You~

*Play Song*

What is life?

What is it? Why are we here?

What's the point of all this? Why did our almighty creator take the time to make us and cast us upon this planet?

Aphmau's biggest question: Why did he add so much pain? 

Grasping the limp hand of her son, calm tears descend down her cheeks. A never-ending stream of sorrow due to a never-ending depressing chain of events. 

The death around her and the death caused by the people she called family....

And the death caused by her....

All of it rides her just to edge, flirting with the fall to end it all. 

It never stops, the earth forever rotates, and the carousel never stops turning. 

A/N Kinda want to rewatch Greys for the 100th time even though I just did

It never....does.

Though from out of the shadows, Aphmau detects the source of her suffering but does little to acknowledge him.

"Mija...."

"Zack...." Aphmau says coldly, knowing her father hated it when she called him that, knowing he had truly fucked up this time. 

"He's dying...is he not?" 

"What does it look like to you?" Aphmau retorts, shooting a harsh look Zack's way, seeing him leaning against the door frame, arms crossed. "Your grandson....tu familia (your family)....your blood....is hurt....because of how you hurt others..."

Zack drops his head, sighing. "I was angry mija...."

"Anger? That's how you are going to bullshit your way out of this? Just because The Phoenix felt an emotion, hundreds had to die?!" Aphmau exclaims, her hold still tight on her ill child's hand.

"Don't act so high and mighty when you frolic casually with the people who pulled the trigger on Katelyn....who shot Andre...."

Aphmau, with no good comeback in mind, groans in frustration and doubles over in her chair, the beyond irritating feelings panging in her heart, unsure on how to relieve them. 

Zack stays silent near the door, observing as a bystander, his daughter falls apart.

"He died about an hour ago...."

Zack masks to the best of his ability his shock, looking back to Andre, who laid as still as ever. His body now abandoned by the machines, as he lay to rest in peace.

"He went peacefully....." Aphmau sniffles, pulling in her lower lip. "He's with mom....in a better place....with a better family..."

Zack lets a singular tear fall for his fallen grandchild, fighting the urge to go back to his old habits. To take his emotion and channel it into anger in hopes of avoiding feeling it. 

"Don't....you understand? All this hate....all this anger....you need to stop for a just a second and feel it.....feel the loss and the grief and mourn...." Aphmau says, now looking Zack in the eye, both shedding slow tears that could never stop. " It's gonna suck....it's gonna be bad....but you can't just keep putting band-aids on the bullet wound dad...."

"You gotta heal...Dad we all gotta heal...there is nothing more for us here but a constant reminder of the bad that encircles us......"

Zack sighs, feeling the forever coming pent up emotion slowly creep its way down his face, just waiting to explode into a powerful waterfall.

"We're done.....it's over....we're free...."

*

"She just disappeared?"

"She hasn't been seen since yesterday, and you know she hasn't left her son's bedside even for a second," Lucinda states, exiting the deserted hospital room, occupied by no patient nor guests as it had been. A room, Aaron had become all too familiar with. 

"I-I don't understand...." Aaron sputters, uneasily sending a shaky hand through his hair. "She said....she said she'd come with me....she said she'd come with Andre....."

"Andre....is dead, Aaron...." Lucinda says strongly, unsure if even her powerful voice made it into his head. 

"Lucinda, she said...."

"I GET IT! She said this, she said that. That woman is a con artist Aaron. Born and raised and whether you want to hear it or not, she played you....." 

Aaron, with his inability to stand still, swings his back into the wall, leaning against it with intense agony. 

"Although...." Lucinda sighed, extending a folded piece of paper in hand. "We did find this on the nightstand....at least for the bad guy...she did said goodbye...."

*

Dear Aaron, or I really should call you Mr. Lycan now.

Aaron had sat himself down in the very seat he had sat in all those times with her. Trying to figure one of the biggest cases in history but also trying to figure out her. She was an anomaly of such great proportions it would baffle Aaron to the end of time. He will never find another woman like her. Sure he'll settle down with a woman whose father isn't a notorious drug lord and have children who will know of no such cruelty that Aphmau did. But this fling, if you could even call it that, is more such a lesson than a romantic memory, that Aaron will carry with him to the grave. 

I'm sorry, for everything. I'm sorry for the lies I told and for the time I wasted. 

You can stop reading now, and just go the rest of your life remembering me as a bad man's daughter, or just a bad woman overall. Go ahead, it's your choice. You deserve to live a life not plagued by such evil.

Or you can continue to read, and really nothing much will change. 

I love you, Aaron Lycan

I can't say I really know love since it has been only on rare occasions where I have even felt something close to the damn emotion. But all I can say is that you gave me feelings that seem to be the only ones manufactured in cliche films and books. 

So I thank you, and that's why I must let you go.

It is possible, that I may have deserved a better life. That I could've gone with you to Falconclaw with you and start anew but alas, we are not in a cliche film, mi amor. 

Quite a cliche book, but anyways

I love you for as much as reason and reality let me, and I am grateful for the awakening and goodness that you inspired in me. I must stay behind and help fix the damage that my family has done. You will probably not see me again, heck in a few years, I could just be a whisper that fades into the wind. 

But I love you....I love you...

Because you gave me what love feels like....of course I loved my son...but I never had someone care for me and envision happiness for me when I was in such darkness as you did....a total stranger....

So go on....live your life of good and bad and I can only hope you are not exposed to such poison ever again.

Keep being the good man you are, and you'll never falter.

                - Aphmau 

This is the end.

I know this is pretty crappy fanfic and it didn't have that much Aarmau in it but I honestly have no idea what's going on anymore. In my writing and in real life. 

Edit: I actually kind of like this AU, but definitely could've been written better or extended further. 

Have a great day my crystals!