Happiness and Heartbreak

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"You sure you're ready for this?" Mykel asked me as I stood nervously in front of the bathroom mirror. I glanced up at his reflection and smiled at the worry in his eyes.

"No." I smiled again. "I'm nervous as all get out. However, I need to do this. And I think Rian needs this also."

In just over half an hour the three of us were all going to my sister's house. Finally, I was to meet my nephews and my niece, and the man my sister married. Over the last few months, since she initially came to Mykel's, and once my guilt began to wane, we both made an effort to keep in contact. We talked on the phone, over text, through messenger. By whatever means we had available. A few days before she asked if I wanted to come meet the rest of my family. It was my eldest nephew's birthday and while they were having a party for him the next day, she asked if I wanted to come for his actual birthday for a BBQ. Nervously I accepted.

"I'm glad you and Liz are coming with me though." He smiled at me, wrapped his arms around me from behind, and kissed my cheek.

"I am too, my love."

It was a half-hour drive from Liz's house to Rian's and I marveled at how close she lived to me. I was wringing my hands together nervously and my breath caught as we pulled into the driveway.

The house was beautiful. Two stories with a detached garage painted a pale shade of blue. The yard was immaculate, freshly cut, and large enough to play on. Together we walked up the walkway and rang the doorbell. Rian answered the door, a huge, yet nervous smile plastered to her face. "Hi," she said to me before glancing at Liz and Mykel. "I'm glad you all could come today. Was the drive alright?" She stepped back, opening the door wider to allow our entrance. "Come in. Everyone is in the backyard."

She showed us through the living room and through the kitchen. "You want anything to drink? We have juice, Coke, tea, Dr. Pepper," she said as she walked. We walked outside. "All the drinks and cups are over there. There's ice in the chest. Mattie?" Liz and Mykel walked over to where the drinks were and I saw them introduce themselves to Rian's husband. I looked to my sister. "I'm really glad you came." She stepped closer as if wanting to embrace, but stopped herself. She didn't want to push my boundaries.

I pulled her into me and we hugged long and hard. "Me, too." I looked at her with a smile. "I'm glad we found each other, Ri. I really want to put the past behind us. I don't want it to hold us back. I really do want a relationship with you. I've missed you so much."

She smiled happily. "I told myself I wouldn't get all emotional." She laughed as she wiped her eyes. "But I'd like that." At that moment a boy approached her and took her hand.

"Mommy, are you okay?"

She smiled down at him before kneeling to his level. "I'm fine, baby. Very happy. You remember me telling you about Mattie?" He nodded and looked up at me.

"You're who I'm named after," he said. "My name is Mattie, too." He smiled. He was a beautiful boy who looked just like Rian.

"Indeed so. I hear it's your birthday." He smiled and nodded.

"Uh-huh. I'm eight today."

I chuckled. "Well, happy birthday, Mattie. And it's very nice to meet you. I have something for you for your special day. You want it now?" I smiled and winked at him.

He nodded. "Well, I heard you like video games from a little birdy, is that right?" He nodded and smiled. From my pocket, I pulled out an envelope and handed it to him.

"Can I open it now, Mommy?" He asked her, his eyes bright with excitement.

"This is your day, baby. Open it now if you like." She stood up and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. The way she squeezed me, so slightly, was more like an affirmation that I was really standing next to her.

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