The Tattoo // Joshler AU

Chapter Ten

Tyler's POV

"Yeah, Ty," As his mouth formed the words, I already knew his reply would be something I didn't want to hear, "You're my best friend too."

Internally, my heart sank slightly at those words. I had sort of wanted him to say that he loved me. What the heck, Tyler? Thoughts like these would only destroy me.

I had to push any trace of wanting Josh deep, deep down, so they couldn't haunt me. I shyly smiled at him, before moving slightly closer to him, almost cuddling him, as we watched the movie.

He shifted, and his head was resting on my chest, his body completely relaxed. Subconsciously, my hands moved to softly play with his hair, eliciting soft murmurs of agreement from him.

The fire red locks were soft, and my hands were gently brushed as they ran themselves through his hair. The movie scene with the snow monster started, and Josh buried his head further into my chest. Without the approval of my brain, my hands moved from his hair to wrap themselves around his small form.

Dusk had set in, and around the apartment, everything was bathed in a gentle light, including his face. The light had formed shadows on his face, making him look more adorable, and younger than his 24 years. I started singing quietly, more to myself than to anyone else,

"I could be your perfect disaster, you could be my ever after.."

Josh looked up at me, and I blushed, mostly because no one has ever really heard me sing. Not even Jenna.

"You're incredible." He spoke in almost a reverent voice, gazing at me with some unidentified emotion twinkling in his stunning eyes.

"Thanks, but no record label thinks that." It was true. As soon as I moved to LA, I had sent out demos to record companies, over 20 of them, only to be told that I "wasn't ready," or I wasn't "what they were looking for." But the worst, the worst reply I ever got, was over the phone.

Flashback

"Hi, Mr. Joseph, this is Radioactive, the record label you sent a demo to?" My heart was pounding. This was it. I'd finally done it. After all the no's, and maybe next time's, I had to have done it. My thoughts were a mess, and my knees were shaking.

"Yes, hi!" My voice shook wildly, not at all the confident image that I wanted to portray to a record label.

"We're afraid that we can't offer you a record deal. We here at Radioactive don't feel that you have enough potential or talent to make it big. The people that viewed your demo highly doubt that you will ever make it big. Thanks for your time!"

Then they hung up.

I crumpled to the floor, overwhelmed with the feeling that my heart had been yanked out of my chest, and the feeling that all my dreams were just that. Dreams.

I'd never make it big. I didn't have potential. I had no talent. It was impossible. Silent tears streamed down my face, falling onto the ground, as I curled up to try and stop the pain. I couldn't breathe and it felt like the walls were closing in on me. I couldn't take any more of this small, dingy apartment.

I had to get out of here. Tears still flowing down my face, blurring my vision, I ran out the door, slamming it as I walked into the rain. Cars sped past as I broke, their bright lights only illuminating the liquid pain falling from my eyes. I ended up on a small bench in a park, silently screaming into the night.

A sleazy nightclub was across the street. I went in, mindlessly downing shots and dancing to an unknown beat. I still felt awful. Some girl came up behind me, grabbing my hand and dragging me out of the bar.

"Are you okay?" She wiped away the remains of my tears. I only cried more at her caring gesture. I shook my head, unsure of anything. "I'll take you home." She took my hand in hers, leading me to a taxi.

"W-what's your name?" The unknown stranger turned to me and smiled softly. I didn't notice her eyes.

"Jenna."

End Flashback

I realised that I was shaking after reliving my personal hell. That was the worst day. Yet, on that worst day, I met her. Jenna.

"Tyler? They're idiots. Your voice is incredible, you're way too good for them." Josh pulled me into him, his small body just the right size for me to cling on to.

"Thanks, Josh." We stayed that way, soaking in the presence of the other person, the contact soothing my trembling body. The peace was interrupted by my phone.

"Tyler! What the hell? Why aren't you home?" Confusion was the only thing I felt. Josh looked at me, inquisitive as to why the person calling me was almost screaming.

"Jenna," I began, and I could feel Josh's shoulders slump. "You told me that you'd be back tomorrow, at like one o'clock."

"Well, Tyler, I'm not! I'm back now. Where the hell are you?" She wasn't in a good mood, and God knows how much I hate it when she's in a bad mood. I glanced back at Josh, only to see pure concern on his face.

Great. Now he would think that I'm a dick and that Jenna is a control freak. She isn't, though, she just cares about me. Sure, sometimes I'd like a little time for myself, but it just shows how much she loves me.

"I'm at Josh's. We were just-" I was cut off by Jenna's rage-filled voice coming through the phone.

"What? What were you doing? You care more about him than me, your own girlfriend?" Her voice started to shake, like she was upset and crying.

Instantly, I felt guilty. I mean, what type of boyfriend was I, if I put my friends before her?

"No, babe, I love you, we were just watching a movie! I'm on my way home now, I'll be there in like five minutes!" She whispered a response and hung up the call. Not looking at Josh, I grabbed my bag, preparing to leave.

"Tyler?" Josh whispered it, and, for the first time since I hung up the phone, I looked at him. His eyes were filling with sorrow and tears, and his mouth was trembling. "She won't hurt you or anything, will she?"

I chuckled, not that I was laughing at him, but because I couldn't ever imagine Jenna hurting me.

"No, it's fine. I'll see you soon, thanks for having me over!" I gave him a cheeky wink and a quick hug, burying my head in his soft hair. I walked out the door, faking confidence. Jenna would never physically hurt me, but her words could be hurtful enough.

Sure enough, the minute I walked into the door, she was almost sobbing, saying that I didn't care about her, that I didn't care that we were soulmates. She screamed at me, then walked out the door, not bothering to tell me where she was going.

I collapsed onto the bed in our room, choking back sobs. That night, I sang myself to sleep, voice soaked with the sound of unshed tears.

"You could be my ever after."