Chapter 14: Demons

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 Tamara’s POV

My breathing slows as Karen catches up to me and encases me in a warm hug. Tears I didn’t even know had fallen from my eyes began to soak into her shirt. I heard additional footsteps and knew instantly who they belonged to. They slowed in speed, so I know that Karen must have given him a look; a look that said to give us a minute. To give me a minute.

“You need to tell him. There are no arguments now, you hear me? He needs to know because I know he can help you,” she whispered in my ear.

I don’t protest. I unwrap my arms from her and wipe my tear stained face. She makes her way past me, back to Jai’s house to collect the car. I turn to face him and it may as well been a waste of time drying my tears because the sight of him made them appear again. I run to him and he holds me with his strong arms as I let out all of the hurt inside me. He was so patient; he never once asked for details. I knew he must have been thinking I was some sort of nutter for doing this at such random moments.

“Jai, can we go for a walk somewhere. Anywhere. I just need to clear my mind of something and I need you to hear it. Just excuse me if I take some time to get it all out; it’s just really hard for me to do,” I say finally.

“Anything. I’ll do anything for you. Just tell me where you want to go,” he coos.

I decide on going to the park and he doesn’t object. I sit myself on the swing, gently pushing myself back and forth. He sits right beside me on the next swing over and I avoid his eyes as I brace myself for what I’m about to do. I’ve never told a living soul what I went through that night, what I saw. Not even the grief councillor that I was forced to see. I’d never even really gotten into it as much as I was planning to with Jai when I had told Sami.

“So basically, this is how it started,” I begin.

(A/N This next flash back is a bit graphic, so please read at your own discretion. This will be the part where all is explained about the car accident involving her parents, so skipping isn’t advisable but I’m not forcing you to read if you don’t like reading gory details.)

 *Flashback*

The vodka burned the back of my throat as I downed my third shot. My whole body buzzed with alcohol as it flowed through me. The more I drank, the more heightened my senses became, so I finished another four vodka shots before I head back to the dance floor. The beat of the music seems to flow through me as I shake what my momma gave me to a tune I can’t even comprehend in this state. All I know is that I can dance along to it.

A cute guy is across the floor so I dance my way over to him, and start to grind up against him. Being a guy, he of course doesn’t object and I’m too out of it to even remember his name. I know I’ve seen him before, but in this moment I couldn’t care less; he’s just another person to dance with. He takes my hand and spins me around. I snake my arms around his neck and move within a breath from his body. I have a sudden impulse to kiss him and so my body just does it before my mind catches up. We make out furiously until the song ends but by then I’m craving another drink. I clumsily untangle myself from him and head to the fridge for something to drink. I crack open a vodka cruiser and skull half of it at once. I finish the rest as I head to the cupboard to fill my grumbling stomach.

After I’ve satisfied my moaning stomach, I head back to the dance floor, on my way grabbing yet another drink. To be honest, at that moment I didn’t care what it was as long as it had that sting of alcohol in its midst. I don’t make it to the end of my drink or to the dance floor because I suddenly collapse right onto someone. My good friend Hannah, I think, comes to my rescue and half drags me up the stairs to the bathroom.

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