Monday
Cyrus's POV:
I hadn't spoken to Tj since we said bye at the party. And I tried to forget whatever happened between us at the couch, I was probably just imagining things. Buffy and Andi were waiting outside my house so we could walk to school together. Their conversation immediately came to a stop as soon as they saw me step outside.
"Um, good morning?" I say confused. They had small smiles. "What's going on?"
"Oh nothing" Buffy says cheerfully. Andi snickers. "Yeah sure, let's go" I walk down my stairs and past them.
I wasn't sure if I wanted to talk to Tj just yet. Would he mention Saturday? Or are we going to pretend like it didn't happen? Did it even happen?
All my questions were answered by a tap on the shoulder while I was putting books in my locker. I turn around to see a blonde boy smiling at me, dark circles under his eyes.
"You should really get more sleep" I tell him
"I know, I just can't sometimes" he explains. "Overthinking stuff"
"Are you ever going to tell me what goes on in your head?" I felt bad for him. Whatever was going on in his life bothered him a lot but he would never talk about it. I believe it's his parents that bother him but every time we talked about them he seemed like he really didn't care. "Maybe... I don't know." He shrugs.
"Did you eat breakfast this time?" I ask him. I swear I should be his mom at this point, I'm always worried for his well being. "Yes actually" he smiles "be proud of me" I raise my hand to fist bump his.
I guess we're not talking about Saturday then.
I think Tj has a girlfriend anyways. I mean not an official girlfriend but a girl-friend. You know, the one a person has where they're just 'talking' if that makes any sense. He sits across the room from me in math, and he's always smiling and laughing with the girl next to him- Lilly. They look good together.
Our teacher assigns us homework, the bell rings and more than half the class is already out the door. I take my time neatly putting my books in my book bag before leaving.
I walk out the room and see Tj leaned against the wall waiting for me. "Underdog!" He says excitedly. He wasn't tired, he just looked like it. "homework at the library?" He asks. I nod. Tj and I were walking side by side, down the hallway, talking like normal human beings until I spot Andi and Buffy staring at us and giggling. Tj must've saw them too because he stopped talking. "Uh sorry I have to talk to them, see you in the library after school" and I headed off in the direction of Andi and Buffy.
Their laughter stops as I approach. "Okay what's going on- and don't tell me nothing"
"It's j-just you and Tj" Andi stutters. "What?" I ask a bit too quickly. A wave of panic going over me. Is it obvious I like him? "He so likes you" Buffy continues. Relief replaces the panic. I shake my head. "He does not, he's into Lilly. And before you guys even think of it- I don't like him either" I lie. Buffy looks at me- I felt bad lying but I didn't want her to freak out over this. Maybe I'll tell them eventually but for now, no.
They shrugged it off and headed to class.
Is it possible Tj could have the slightest bit of feelings for me too?
I doubt it.
I met up with Tj in the library. I saved apple slices from lunch to eat here, food was allowed as long as it wasn't messy. Today was a good day for Tj. He wasn't so tired or sleepy, he actually ate, he understood homework better this time. I think today was a good day for him.
TJ's POV:
Today was probably one of the hardest days I've had to fake.
After what happened at the party on Saturday, I couldn't talk to Cyrus. I couldn't even sleep Saturday night, and I barely slept Sunday night.
I couldn't let Cyrus know that though, he'd worry and I'd have to tell him what's wrong. It was either look like a complete mess today, or fake it as much as I could.
He was the only thing running through my mind, and when he asked if I had eaten breakfast, I told him I did. But I didn't.
What even happened Saturday? If we were alone in that room for a minute longer before Jonah walked in- everything would've been different.
Would I have kissed Cyrus? No- he would've pushed away and called me insane.
I'm actually thankful Jonah interrupted us.
I acted as if everything was fine. I was upbeat, I didn't mention Saturday and neither did he. I pretended to understand the homework but that didn't work when he told me to try doing 5 questions by myself.
He continues doing his own work as I stared at the math problems on my worksheet, not understanding a single one. Usually he'd help me with each one- and I would understand it sometimes. But this time he left me to do it on my own.
After a minute or two, he noticed me not doing anything, just fidgeting with my pencil. "You gonna do them?"
It made my head hurt, "I'll be right back" I got out of my seat and went out into the hallway. I was frustrated, my ran my fingers through my hair.
I'm gonna have to tell him about my dyscalculia eventually. But today's not that day. I didn't want to risk him thinking I'm an absolute freak and abandon me. I already screwed myself over accepting the fact that I like him- I let him make me happy, that just gives him the power to hurt me.
I walked back into the library to se Cyrus sitting there confused. "Sorry, I just needed some water" I make up as an excuse. "Everything okay?" He looks at me with concern in his eyes. I nod smiling, "Uh can you help me with the problems?" He stared at me as I sat down before changing his focus to the math.
I hope he fell for it.
