The Lost Asgardian (A Loki X Reader Story)

Part 6

"Concentrate, Y/N." It had been two days since your incident with the arrows, and you'd barely made any progress. Loki observed you now from the other side of the training room, watching intently as you ran your fingers through your hair in frustration. Your brow was furrowed as you tried to keep the rubber sphere from lifting off of the ground. The sphere shook as you directed all your energy into keeping it from moving, but the frustration and anger you felt overcame your efforts and the sphere raised of what seemed like its own accord.
"I'm sorry- I.." Tears welled in your eyes as you realized that you failed once again in keeping your emotions in check.
Loki shook his head, coming closer as he said, "It's alright, maybe you should take a break."
"No, I can't stop, I have to keep going. I have to- I have to do this."
Your voice broke during the last sentence and something flashed in Loki's eyes.
He took your face in his hands and said softly but firmly, "Listen to me, stop thinking. Whatever you've got going on in that head of yours, let it cease. Focus on your breathing."
You did as he said, looking into his eyes and breathing shakily. As you calmed and all of your thoughts faded away, you heard the thud of the sphere falling back down to the floor.
A few tears were still running down your cheeks and Loki wiped them away, gently asking, "Would you like to know what my mother told me after you were.. taken?"
You were confused as to what this had to do with your training, but you nodded anyway. Loki's hands slowly left your face and fell to his sides, but his eyes stayed fixated on yours.
His voice was still soft as he said, "She told me that when I'm in the middle of a storm and the sea around me is raging, I should keep my eyes set on the lighthouse that guides me to shore. I didn't quite understand what she meant at the time but I did later on, and those words were what helped me focus in the bloodiest of battles and the deadliest of wars."
You nodded slowly in understanding, taking a deep breath as Loki returned to the other side of the room.
"It is getting late. Give it one last try and we will be finished for today. Are you ready?" He didn't want to push you too hard, but he knew that you had to start making progress or you would be a danger to yourself and everyone in the palace.
Bracing yourself, you replied, "Yes."
As soon as the word had left your lips, a blood curdling scream filled the room and your heart started racing. The scream was coming from a speaker, but it caused a wave of panic to pass over you and an intense sense of danger to put you on edge.
Almost immediately, the ball you struggled to control earlier shot into the air and you clamped your hands over your ears, attempting to block out the scream recording. You squeezed your eyes shut and tried to focus on your breathing to calm yourself down, but the panic just wasn't subsiding.
Loki's words came to your mind and you shakily opened your eyes. Forcing yourself to ignore the ball that was still hovering in the air, you set your eyes on Loki. He was your guiding light and you knew that you were safe as long as you were with him. Your heart rate slowed and your fear subsided, and after a minute or two of keeping your eyes on Loki, you dropped your hands. The scream recording looped and began again, but you kept your gaze on Loki and you didn't begin to panic. Instead, the ball that had caused you so much grief over the past couple of days dropped to the floor with an echoing thud.
The recording stopped and Loki looked like he was at a loss for words.
After a few moments of silence, he said, "That was incredible. We still have work to do, but that was- you were amazing."
A relieved smile lifted your lips and you asked wearily, "Does that mean I'm going again?"
Loki laughed, coming close and handing you water. "Absolutely not, you deserve a break. We'll continue tomorrow-"
You heard the training room door open and a tentative voice come from behind you, "Pardon the interruption, your highness, but may I speak with you for a moment?"
Loki nodded in reply. His eyes met yours as he passed you, and it seemed like his deep and warm gaze saw straight into your soul.
You tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, trying to ignore the way your breathing hitched and the heat that rushed to your face. You sipped the water as Loki spoke to the man in the doorway with a hushed voice, and you knew immediately that something was wrong by the apprehensive look on the servant's face. The tense discussion went on for a few more moments before the servant departed.
You hesitated before asking, "Is everything alright?" You moved tentatively closer to Loki as he sighed and shook his head.
The bitterness of his voice increased with every word he spoke. "We all have been searching for the man that took you, to no avail. I visited the place you told me about, the one where he... held you captive. There was no trace of him anywhere, it was as if he vanished. We finally found a new lead, and we were all hoping we would be able to catch the man and bring him to justice.. however it seems he has slipped through my fingers yet again. I have nothing to go on anymore."
There was a few moments of tense silence as Loki turned his back to you, his shoulders rising and falling with his deep breaths.
You stepped closer to him and, without thinking that maybe you shouldn't, placed your hand comfortingly on Loki's shoulder. He turned his head ever so slightly to look into your eyes, and your voice was soft and gentle as you said, "You'll find him- I know you will. But you need to stop putting so much pressure on yourself."
Loki gazed at you for a few moments before something in his face shifted and he said, "It is quite late, and I'm sure you're exhausted."
You dropped your hand from his shoulder, a bit taken aback by what felt like a dismissal.
"Do you need me to accompany you on the way back to your room?"
You stood there for a moment, confused as to why he was suddenly acting cold towards you. Finally, you said, "I'll be just fine on my own, thank you." The hurt you felt was evident in your voice, and you thought you saw a touch of guilt on his face before you turned and left the room.
You paused a moment after you closed the door, trying to remember which hallway took you back to your room. You heard a loud crashing come from the other side of the door and your heart dropped, fearing that Loki was somehow hurt. You put your hand on the doorknob to go back inside but the guard posted next to the door warned, "I wouldn't do that, miss. It's best to leave his majesty alone when he's like this."
You released your hold on the door and stepped away from it before questioning, "May I ask how often he does this?"
"Not too often, I suppose, but in my opinion.. it always had something to do with your..."
He didn't finish the sentence but you knew exactly what he was insinuating. You thanked the guard and made your way back to your room, those words weighing heavily on your mind.
Your abduction had messed up your life, but it was getting a little easier for you to put everything behind you with every day that you spent at the palace. You knew you were finally where you should be. You just didn't realize how much your abduction had affected Loki.

You tried your best to sleep that night, but you just couldn't. Even though you knew none of it was your fault, the guilt plagued your mind and kept you wide awake.
Sighing, you got up from the bed and slid on a white silk bath robe over your sleep wear. You wandered down the halls, not really having a destination- but you found yourself stopping when you reached Loki's door. There were no guards stationed outside it, so you thought that Loki wasn't actually inside. You were going to turn around and go back to your room, but something inside of you told you to stay. You lightly knocked on the door, and to your surprise Loki answered. He was wearing the same clothes as when you last saw him, and he looked like he hadn't slept at all.
"What are you doing up? It's late- well, I guess you could say it's early now. Is everything alright?" His voice was filled with concern in the last sentence, and you had to physically stop yourself from reaching out to him. It was honestly concerning how much of an attachment you already had to him- and only after a few days.
Your lips lifted into a reassuring smile as you said, "No, I'm fine. I couldn't sleep, and.. I just wanted to see if you were okay."
"I'm fine, Y/N-"
You cut him off, pleading, "Please don't lie to me. I'm worried about you, Loki."
For a moment it looked like he wasn't going to budge, but Loki finally sighed and gestured for you to come into his room. You obliged and watched as he shut the door behind you before turning to face you.
Your voice was soft as you prompted, "What's going on with you, Loki? Whatever it is, you can tell me."
"I guess I'm just.. afraid. Afraid that I'll lose you again. And that fear won't go away as long as your abductor is still out there." He sat (more like sunk) down on the edge of the bed and let out a long breath. "And I've felt so angry for a long time. You were taken from m- from us. I'm angry at him and I'm, I'm angry at myself and I just.. I have all of this rage inside of me and it won't go away. And I don't know if it ever will."
You kneeled before him and gently unfolded one of his clenched fists. You pressed a kiss onto his knuckles and then flipped his hand to over and rubbed comforting, light circles into his palm. You could care less about the consequences that might come along in doing so.
You waited until you saw the tension leave his body before saying, "You have to stop blaming yourself for what happened. It wasn't your fault, just like it wasn't mine. There was nothing you could have done to stop it, okay? You were just a child, Loki."
You could tell by his expression that your words weren't having the affect you had hoped. "You know why I'm not afraid that it could happen again? Because I know that I'm safe as long as I'm with you. You would do anything to keep me from harm, I know you would. And with your training, I'll be able to protect myself soon enough. Loki, I know there's no way that anything like that will ever happen again. You have to believe that, too."
Loki slowly nodded, looking into your pleading and hopeful eyes and knowing that you were right. Nothing like that would ever happen again because he wasn't going to let it.
A smile formed on his lips and you found your own mouth mimicking it. After a few moments of just looking at him, you realized that you were still holding his hands. You placed them back on his lap before rising and clearing your throat.
"It's getting late- or early and you need your sleep. I'll see you in a few hours."
You flashed him another smile before walking in the direction of the door.
"I appreciate it, but there's no use in it now. It's a new day and I'm already awake."
You turned back to look at him, a mischievous grin lifting your lips. You clasped your hands behind your back as Loki questioned the look on your face, "What is it?"
"Well, neither of us are going to sleep now and there's still a few hours before daylight. I have an idea of something we could do, if you're up for it."
Loki's eyes lit up with curiosity. "What do you have in mind?"
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