Illicit (Itachi Uchiha Love Story)

Chapter 37

That following day, everything calmed down in the village and I went home to take a shower. After I got out and got dressed, there was a knock at my door and I rushed over. 

It was Asuma. He had an unreadable expression on his face, but it definitely wasn't a happy one. I suddenly got this rush of anxiety, because I think I knew what it was going to be. 

"What happened?" I ask, hoping I was wrong.

Asuma just embraced me in a hug. "Dad...he died in combat..."

I couldn't return the hug. The world suddenly felt as if it stopped spinning and my eyes widened. My legs started to grow weak on me and I couldn't form any words. I could physically feel my heart starting to break.

Asuma let go and I couldn't stop the sob from coming out. 

I dropped to the ground, burying my face in my hands. 

Why?

Why him? It should've been me.

He was the only parent I had left and Orochimaru took him away from me.

God damnit. I should've been there. Maybe if I was up there, his life could've been spared.

Asuma kneeled down and held me as I sobbed into his chest. I started to calm down, but tears were still spilling down my cheeks. 

"We're going to have a funeral for him soon, so you need to get changed. I'll wait for you so we can go together with Konohamaru," Asuma said, helping me stand up.

I didn't have any words. I just turned around and he followed me inside. He sat down on my couch as I went to my room to get changed into our funeral attire. Once I was ready, we both left and Kurenai caught up with us.

Then we found Konohamaru and we all walked to his funeral.

Asuma looked up at the sky and I was still speechless. 

Don't get me wrong, I love my mom. She will always be my mom and I will forever regret not making any attempts to mend our strained relationship, but I've always been closer with my dad. He was always more understanding towards me and was only strict if he had to be.

My father's death hit me hard. I felt extra guilty now. I didn't make any attempts to reach out to Mom, and now I wasn't there when my dad died. 

"Even the heavens weep..." Asuma remarked, watching the rain pour.

Konohamaru was sobbing the entire time. I pulled him close to me, still crying myself. 

It was silent, no one said a word.

Iruka then put his arm around Konohamaru too to help comfort him.

Naruto broke the silence.

"Iruka-Sensei? Why do they do it?" He asked. "Why do they risk their lives for other people?"

Iruka replied, but I was too caught up with my own thoughts to listen.

I couldn't stop scolding myself for not being there to help him when he was fighting Orochimaru. I kept telling myself that I should've been there and it should've been me, instead of him. The rain started to stop, but it was still cloudy.

The funeral ended and I stayed longer to see my father's face one last time. Konohamaru also stayed for the same reason.

"Dad, I'm so sorry I wasn't there," I sniffled, talking to the picture.

Konohamaru and I eventually left, but we weren't very talkative.

"I miss him..." Konohamaru said quietly.

"Me too," I sighed. "I hate myself for not being there,"

Once I got to Konohamaru's house, I gave him one last hug and immediately went home. I needed to cry some more. 

I buried my face in my pillow, sobbing again. 

I felt a mixture of emotions. Despair and anger.

I was pissed off that Orochimaru killed him. I want to get back at him so bad, but I knew I wouldn't be able to do that realistically.

Plus, I know that's not what Dad would've wanted. All he wanted was for his student to come back to the village. 

If he could hear me, I hope he tells Mom how sorry I am for the way I acted back when I was a stupid teenager and how sorry I am for not being able to fix our relationship before she passed away. 

I hope he was happy seeing her again. I remember he tried to hide how torn up he was over her death, but I could see through him. I knew how much it broke him. Maybe now, he'll be much happier up there with her.

I just wish I could tell them both how sorry I am.

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Sorry for the short chapter. I had to cut out a scene that was here previously because it just doesn't work here.