zoella winchester and her twin brother zachary are not only different from eachother but are still secretly alike and their best friend from birth felicity sees what others dont see between the twins.
zoe is the nerd between the three shes funny and...
next day went by really fast and i didnt see him until lunch time he looked my way and winked at me and i blushed looking away and i heard him chuckle. i was at my locker with city till she looked behind me " im gonna kill him " i turned around and saw something that broke my heart into pieces.
damien was kissing sophie
what the fuck is wrong with me
hes not even mine to begin with
they pulled away and he looked at me and i looked away " zoe its not what it looks like " i started to walk away and he ran after me " zoe can you just stop and listen to me " i stopped and turned around " what damien what is there to talk about " " she came to me and kissed me ok i was headed your way till she showed up and just threw herself at me " " yea and you kissed her back " " no i didnt " " yesterday was just a bluff right " " what no " " yes it fucking was you go ahead and ask me out then we go places after the game having fun and then you kiss me and make me fall for you all over again then today your kissing sophie " " zoe " " you know now that i think about it before we hung out for a day and went out last night i remember saying we wouldnt become buddies after we bumped into eachother so how about we go back to that huh i dont know you you dont know me " he looked hurt but then said " zoe i - " " why should i care who you makeout with i mean you where never mine to begin with i was just dumb enough thinking you actually liked me " he looked like he was about to cry " zoe please dont do this " i looked at him " just leave me alone and have a nice life " i walked away and ran to my car and drove home. when i got there a ran to my room ignoring my mother calling me, i locked my door jumped on my bed and burst into tears.
why am i feeling like this
like i said before he was never mine in the first place
i guess i do love him but in my own way and there is no way i could face him again
three days later i drove to school wearing a grey and light green long sleeve shirt nike leggings and white converse with my hair in a messy bun
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i went to my locker with my headphones on listening to im a mess by bebe rexha ignoring everyone and everything. i looked his way and he looked my way with a look of pain and sadness i shook my head turned back around and got back in my car and drove to my favorite place whenever i felt like this or felt angry.
when i got to the clearing i climbed up my tree and sat there leaning against it closing my eyes and singing along with the song
Everything's been so messed up here lately Pretty sure he don't wanna be my baby Oh, he don't love me, he don't love me He don't love me, he don't love me But that's okay 'Cause I love me, yeah, I love me Yeah, I love me Yeah, I love myself anyway Hey
Everything's gonna be alright Everything's gonna be okay It's gonna be a good, good, life That's what my therapist say Everything's gonna be alright Everything's gonna be just fine It's gonna be a good, good life
I'm a mess, I'm a loser I'm a hater, I'm a user I'm a mess for your love, it ain't new I'm obsessed, I'm embarrassed I don't trust no one around us I'm a mess for your love, it ain't new
Nobody shows up unless I'm paying Have a drink on me cheers to the failing Oh, he don't love me, he don't love me He don't love me, he don't love me But that's okay 'Cause I love me, yeah, I love me Yeah, I love me Yeah, I love myself anyway Hey
Everything's gonna be alright Everything's gonna be okay It's gonna be a good, good life That's what my therapist say Everything's gonna be alright Everything's gonna be just fine It's gonna be a good, good life
I'm a mess, I'm a loser I'm a hater, I'm a user I'm a mess for your love, it ain't new I'm obsessed, I'm embarrassed I don't trust no one around us I'm a mess for your love, it ain't new
Everything's gonna be alright, alright Everything's gonna be just fine, just fine It's gonna be a good, good life
I'm a mess, I'm a loser I'm a hater, I'm a user I'm a mess for your love, it ain't new I'm obsessed, I'm embarrassed I don't trust no one around us I'm a mess for your love, it ain't new
i kept my eyes closed shutting out everything and just let myself drown into the music and let it take over. i ignored all the phone calls i got and just went to sleep without knowing because i just wanted to be on my own and if it could be that way forever then ill be fine with it. i sigh knowing the calls wont stop i picked it up " hey " " hey you ok " " if you mean feeling like shit then yea " " where are you " " the clearing " " want me to come over there " " no i just wanna be alone right now " " alright but just know we're here for you " he paused " captain " i laughed a little " there it is " " shut up " " anyways ill get your work for you alright ill see you at home " " ok " and hung up.
good life my ass
i really am a mess
i got in my car and drove home and saw that my moms car was there. " zoe is that you " i heard my mom say and i walked in the kitchen, she looked at me " whats wrong " " why does life suck " she opened her arms and ran into them and cried " my poor baby i hate seeing you like this " she rubbed my back and comforted me like she always did " now tell me what happened " and i told her everything from when i bumped into damien to now what shocked me is she didnt look angry at all " thats the part where you yell at me for fighting skipping school and falling for a gangleader and ship me to boarding school " she laughed and i was creeped out " mom are you okay " " yes and im not angry its part of who you are honey and we cant change that or take that away from you i mean to be honest i was quite the troublemaker when i was your age then i met your father and to be honest i would say that damien is almost the same as your father " " really " " mhmm but what he did to you was wrong " she looked a little angry " but honey the way youre feeling right now is normal i mean you cant help who you fall for right i mean gangleader or not he sounds like a hot guy " i chuckled " if only dad heard you " " hes not here is he " " true " " now you get your ass in that car and go talk to him and hear him out im sure hes feeling like shit too " i looked unsure " youll never know what actually happened if you dont talk to him now go " and i did as told.
