Why Harry Potter's Better Than Twilight

DRAMIONE RANT

OKAY THIS ISN'T ABOUT TWILIGHT BUT WHATEVER

It's about DraMione, my second to last least favorite ship of this fandom, Drarry being first. Or any ship with Draco for that matter. Or SnapeXhermione, SnapeXHarry or any of the other weird Snape ships.

Or food ships, like what.

Okay so anyway. This is the plot of most DraMione fics:

Draco is in library and because he's an idiot he needs someone to help him with homework. He sees Hermione all alone looking really hot or something reading a book. He says,"AY MUDBLOOD NERD WEIRDO I NEED HELP ON THIS GRANGER GET OVER HERE!!!!" and then Hermione walks over like the apparently really hot babe she is like,"✨✨✨✨ㅂ👄ㅂ✨✨✨oh hello, DRACO. I can help you with that. " In some really sexy way that turns Draco on and suddenly... They start Snogging like oh okay that escalated quickly. Oh yeah, and Hermione's apparently some slutty romantic chick and draco's suddenly interested in romance. And then, Ron comes out of nowhere and gets all mad at hermione and Draco beats him up or whatever, and she's like,"oh, my hero!!"

Yeah that's basically it. Or some other stuff like they go back to hogwarts after the battle and McGonagall's like,"Oi kiddos you're head boy and girl now now you must share everything INCLUDING BEDS BECAUSE THAT MAKES SENSE" and then they fall in love.

Okay, I get that Draco had a slight crush on Hermione, but he doesn't crush on her super duper extremely hard as portrayed. And Hermione has never and will never like Draco. Who could like the rat faced ferret boy?//every lady HP fan but me// and hermione is not, as a matter of fact, a romantic slutty person. She doesn't have time for such things. She only has time for books and such. And apparently, she's some professional kisser and some professional at bed related things. Guys no. When would she ever practice that in her meantime? She literally only seriously kissed a dude twice.

I think I mostly don't like this ship is because I love canon ships that make flippin' sense. Like I ship romione so hard omf. Same with Hinny and Jily and a bit of Snily. BY THE WAY- that ship shouldn't be called Snily because it's Severus' last name and Lily's first. It would be Snevans or... I dunno, severily? That sounds like severely.

Anna