The Broken Hearts Club

Our Escape

    Sie hat schmerzen.

    Those three words coated a sticky note. I stuck it to my wall, then leaned back into my chair. Suddenly feeling a dreariness towered above me like a tsunami over a city. Sleeping the past few months had been like throwing a string to a snake and expecting it to tie it. It wasn't going to happen. Though right now I had been dying to crawl up into bed. Currently it was dark outside, storm clouds were brewing as the sun itself was setting. Raindrops created that somewhat satisfying music upon the roof.
    My heavy eyes drifted to the sleepy brunette that laid bundled up on my bed. Oh, how I envied her right now. I had carried Caroline to the nearest taxi, having to avoid the suspicious stare from the driver, then carrying her up the stairs of my house. What else was I supposed to do? Take her back to the club with a messed up face? I will admit I was rather selfish in my decision making. I wouldn't say I was afraid, but more worried that they'd think I did it. My head fell back, guilt corroded me now. Caroline would be safer in the care of people she knew.
    Crap, I should have taken her to the hospital for all I know. 
    I scanned her face. I did my best to clean her messy makeup. Despite the bruises, freckles covered her skin. She obviously covered it all up to hide it. I couldn't help but wonder how and why. What did she do to deserve this? Pity filled my chest. I had seen some pretty messed up guys, but never this bad. Never on a girl. 
    Caroline stirred in her sleep. I looked away and out the window. The rain was pouring harder now. My eyes gazed over to her quickly. Soft blue and emerald green eyes starred up at me. I turned away again. She hazily sat up, the blanket that was around her now draped around her hips. There was silence around the room for a few moments. It was awkward.  
    "Hey," Caroline spoke softly, her voice sounded hoarse. When I looked over at her again, I wasn't expecting her to be smiling, "Do you kidnap every girl that has a panic attack in front of you?"
    I smirked, "Don't girls like that?" She laughed lightly. The truth was this wasn't the first time I had to carry a girl home. Though I had known her since middle school, and she was drunk, and looking for a one nighter. It was Jess of course. I frowned. That was the old her.
    Caroline slid off the bed, stumbling a little, then came closer to me. It wasn't a very big room so she didn't have to go too far. I looked up to her, expecting to see her staring at me but instead her eyes were glued to the window. Not to what was outside rather to the reflection it showed. It was evident she didn't like what she saw. Her bright eyes were full of fear and sadness. "Um, I know it looks bad."
    "Just a little bit," I said softly.
    "It's-it really isn't as bad as you might think," she said looking away.
     She was covered in scars and bruises, what part of it wasn't bad? it wasn't my place to ask, but I did, "Did someone do that to you?"
     Caroline started to fiddle with her hair, not responding to my question, "I'm sorry I panicked, it's sort of a problem of mine." My eyes curiously watched her cover her face more with her hair. "Running usually helps." She smiled at me, then grabbed her backpack from the bed. She sighed heavily, mumbling something incoherent. "I, uh, forgot my makeup bag. Darn it."
    She turned around and sat back onto the bed. Her eyes gazed around the room, landing back onto me. A sweet smile spread across her lips. I wondered why and how she was so calm right now. I was positive Caroline could sense the questions that were brewing inside my mind.
   "Let me ask you a question instead," she really did read my mind, "why did you bring me here?"
    "You ran away, so I figured you didn't want anyone to know," I answered her simply.
   She nodded; "That makes sense, but I do understand if you were concerned."
   I stared at her with more confusion, and asked: "Concerned?"
   Caroline's eyes looked down, almost nervously, "Concerned if they thought it was you." Hearing her saying that overfilled me with guilt. "I don't think you are capable of that, you should know that."
    She was looking at me now with such a sweet, innocent expression. Why would she think that? This girl didn't even know me. She knew nothing about me. I sat up and brushed a hand through my hair, avoiding her eyes. 
  "No-nobody did this to me." I could hear her stand up from the bed again, causing the floors to creak as she moved. I glanced at her questioningly, but I didn't respond at first, allowing her to speak. "L-life just gets to be too much and it-it's sort of an escape." The way she spoke, it was so sad. "I know it's wrong, but I can't stop it." 
   I turned around to face her, she was holding everything in. Ready to burst at the slightest touch. We were already so close in this tiny room, I could hear her stunted breaths. I took in one deep breath as well before rolling up my sleeves. 
   Pale wrists exposed deep scars, old and new. Her sweet voice halted, leaving us in silence. I pulled my sleeves back down quickly. "I know how it feels to need an escape."
   Her own ivory hands reached towards mine and held one up, causing me to shiver at her touch. I wanted to pull away immediately, but I didn't. She ran her fingers across my wrist. My own breath hitched now. Caroline's touch was not so surprisingly light and careful. 
    I should pull away. Get away.
    A sob echoed around the room, distracting me. She was crying again. 
   But what surprised me even more, was when her body clashed with mine.
   Arms wrapped around my waist.
   I didn't know what to do. My arms stayed by my side.
   "I'm so sorry."
   She left after that. Ran out my door and down the stairs. 

   I'd be lying if I said I wasn't confused.