Into the Crowd. ✔

CHAPTER 5

I once figured out the mystery about the boy named Josh Boweman. Now years later
this boy turned into a man. A man who held my heart at times I wasn’t even aware,let alone remember. My life? You can say it is one for the story books, the ones you read when your love life just doesn’t quit gut it anymore, because nobody knew the feelings deep inside of me, to life inside of a body for ten years and not even
remember who you are and how come I am with child. To have people who you are
‘suppose’ to love you end up lying to you? So when I woke up on that godforsaken
hospital bed for the second time and let my memories be opened like a stage curtain?
You are going to be angry. Be angry at the man beside my bed. Again a mystery. But nothing stopped me from not craving every piece of him time and time again. I tried to stay mad. I tried to ignore the sick feeling of abandonment in my stomach. I tried, but one shed tear from him brought every wall I was trying to build straight down
to the foundation. The feeling to be stuck in an alternative reality moments after
moments as I tried to break free from the darkness I was enveloped in. To open my
eyes and find that every piece of memories was a dream, but I held on to locked away
in the deepest chambers of my existence. I held on to that feeling that I felt him. I
knew he was there patiently waiting for me to wake up to remember. So when I
finally pulled myself out of my state of mine and woke up to the smiling crying face
of my daughter, my angel. My only piece of light these past ten years. I might not
have known back then where or from whom she came from, but she was and is my
constant light, my only hope from my nightmares of a blue eyed boy I couldn’t place.
Loneliness my only friend in a city I didn’t know. Send there by the people I thought
only had my best interest at heart, turns out they were the poison in the lies. For
years I believed their lies about the ‘worthless piece of shit’ of a boy who left me for dead at the side of the road. I never knew his name. Somehow at times I felt relieved to not have had that man at my side. To abandon me, I can still live with, but the abandon my unborn child? Well that would gut the cake. So imagine how it would
feel like to wake up after ten years and every memory comes crashing back into your life and not to even realize which way is up anymore? Now that I am laying alone in the tiny bed waiting for the two people I called mom and dad, speechless and angry. The instant he stepped out of the room with the promises of tomorrow and I still couldn’t help but to wonder, should I believe him or not? Can I trust anyone now?
It’s really hard to figure out the amount of lies ANYBODY could have spilled. Even
though I craved his touch and the emotions in his eyes, I couldn’t help but to wonder. Where does trust start and end in this equation?

                    *

“Do you trust me?” Josh kept his grip around my waist as we moved deeper into the
water. The motion of the forming waves crashing into us. I kept my eyes shut to the lids
because I’m too scared to see my oncoming death. I absolutely hate the ocean. It’s pretty to look at but a mystery once you sit foot in it. I slowly opened then back up, the salt burning up my eyes as I look around the calm water. Confused, because a second ago I could swear I was about to die, but now that I returned his gaze and saw him smiling up at me as he press me against his warm sculpted chest. Too scared to let ago. Now I
am floating in his arm just beyond the waves where the motion off the water and the feeling of his arms wrapped around me, calms every fear I ever had.
“You alright there my love?” I smiled at the endearment.
“I hate you for this.” I grinned down at him tasting the salt on his lips. An hour ago I didn’t think that I was about to face my biggest fear, but to be in his arms made it all a little
easier.
“No you don’t. You can never hate me, you love me too much.” He whispered as he
releases his death grip on my waist as he eases me back a bit. Giving me some space
to become use to the slow floating motions of the water around us. I stretched my leg out trying to touch something, but being shorter than Josh didn’t give me the same advantage of the sandbank beneath his feet. I nervously looked around me, looking at the unknown.
“Honey you have watched too much ‘Jaws’ growing up.”
“And whose fault was that? Dragging me to every ‘Jaws’ marathon humanly possible. I
mean come on, I was a fourteen year old GIRL!” he could only manage a laugh. Gosh I love his smile. So I took revenge and splash water into his open laughing eyes. Take that love! He lets out a soft cry as the salted water hits his eyes. I swallowed hard waiting for
his reaction. My tongue on the tip of absolute amusement. He managed a small cough before he went into total silence. His eyes red from the burn. His gaze focused on something in the distance. I followed his gaze but saw nothing but endless waters. I swallowed hard and his sudden change of attitude. In one swift moment he grabs me
from behind one arm around my waist while his other hand crashes across my mouth.
Momentarily shushing me. My eyes grew wide and wild as I felt his heavy breathing at
the back of my neck.
“Don’t move a muscle.” He harshly whispered into my right ear. My body went rigid. What the hell is going on? Right on that moment I could swear I started to hear the theme song to the movie I dreaded most on this planet earth. The ‘tadum-tadum’.
“Shit!” he half yelled before I felt a tug behind me followed by a yelp as I turned around
and saw his head disappear beneath the water. His touch was gone as I frantically looked around, kicking around with a scream on my lips before me myself was dragged under water. Big hands holding me under for a second before I resurfaced. Coughing in shock as I heard a rumble of laughter as Josh himself resurfaced.
“You idiot. Idiot. Idiot. Idiot! I am going to kill you!” I emphasized every word with a punch on his hard chest. My fists bouncing off with ease. He just kept on laughing, but moments later he calmed down with his hands running up and down my sides. And I for once, being totally in love with this boy managed a small smile an edge of laughter building in my chest. I just couldn’t stay mad at him. He pulled me close his arms locking behind my
back.
“I am sorry Maddie. I just could resist anymore, but it was worth the revenge.”
“Don’t ever scare me like that again, Josh.” I deadly panned trying to keep the
seriousness on my face but failed miserably.
“I promise. Happy Seventeenth Birthday my love.” He leans in the last centimeter and presses his lips against mine. Oh how every kiss felt like the first one every time. My hands
locked at the nap of his neck twisting into the wet hair at the back, giving it one last hard pull for punishment before I give myself over to the sensations. A soft moan escapes my throat as his hands starts to move up and down my back, stopping dangerously close
every time it gets close to pieces of me yet to be discovered. I pulled back with a huge smile on my face.
“Well I can’t say that this was the perfect gift, scaring me half to death.”
“There’s more where this comes from. This was only a way to help you to let go of your fears and putting every piece of trust you have into me as I do to you, because one way or another I would never let go, even if my life depends on it.” The audience in my head gave a loud ‘Aww’ as my heart melted at the honesty and love in his voice.
“I love you.” I said.
“Then this is your lucky day, because I never stopped, not even for a minute.”
“You’re a sweat talker you know that?”
“Only with you. Now come one pumpkin let’s get out of here, because there is more
surprises to come.” He pushed me back into the position he had me when we made our
way in. When the waves began pushing their way against our backs I didn’t feel the same fear I once had, instead I was focused on this wonderful man holding me as if he was too scared to let me go. On that moment I didn’t care about what the future holds. I only cared about the one who was doing the holding. Before we made it to the shore I need to tell him something. The answer to the question her asked me before.
“Yes.” I said to him. He looked at me smiling as he tries to figure out what it means.
“’Yes’ what?”
“I do trust you. With my life.” He’s hand squeezed my hip, before he fully focused on me.
“Thank you.” He said with a sweet kiss on my nose before he lifts me up out of the water and carried me all the way back to our abandoned towels on the beach. Way, way into the distance.