Circus Freak

(27) ＯＰＥＮＩＮＧ ＮＩＧＨＴ

Caroline's P.O.V

Today is the day.

Marty and I have worked long and tirelessly to pull this off. Today was opening night. The ringleader had allowed Marty to perform with me for the first part of my routine. Everyday Marty and I had an intense training session, I could NOT fail tonight. We had spent weeks trying to perfect this routine.

The only problem is that we trained in a dry space- the routine is meant to be performed with water. Anxiety gnawed at me as I thought about all the ways this could go wrong. What if I slip? What if Marty and I mess up our timing? Bitting my lip, I close my eyes and exhale softly hoping to calm myself down.

It works a little as I stare at Marty who was calmly sitting down on his couch. We were currently in the trailer waiting for the Cirque Acts to start. The officials and staff members were barely starting to open up the arena and sit people down in their assigned seats so we still had hours to kill before going to perform since our routine was last.

Now, that didn't necessarily mean that I still wasn't tripping out, because I was totally anxiety-ridden as I paced back and forth in the trailer. After watching me pace back and forth, Marty stood up and directed me to the couch so that I could relax. That obviously didn't help much but I appreciated the thoughtfulness.

Marty sat next to me and held up his notepad to me, it read: Everything is going to be okay. I nodded as I subconsciously began to bite my lip once again. Marty sighed and stood up once more. I watched him as he held his hand out to me. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion but I trusted him so I took his hand.

His hand was warm and comforting as he began to lead me away from the trailer and into the backlot. We walked for a bit before we came to the secluded training area where we have been practicing our act for the past few weeks. Marty let go of my hand and began writing on his notepad. After a few moments he handed me the note and it read: You up for one more practice run?

Looking up at him, I nodded and breathily said: "Yes please."

Marty's green eyes sparkled in excitement as he once again held his hand out for me. I wasted no time in reaching out and grasping his warm hand in mine. He began to slowly go through the motions of our routine with me one last time and it felt comforting to be in his presence. When we finished our first half of the routine he slowly left me and went off to the side. Anxiety began to claw at my frantically beating heart as I was now supposed to perform the rest on my own.

I looked at Marty and he gave me an encouraging grin. Taking a deep breath, I made my way to the hanging silk. My hands shook and I couldn't seem to grasp anything. My chest began to frantically go up and down- I was having a panic attack.

Strong arms immediately snacked around my waist and it brought me into a warm chest. Marty held me as I shook, he held me close and slowly rubbed my back in a soothing manner.

"I-- I can't do this," I stuttered out as tears began to roll down my cheeks.

Truth was, I was scared shitless, if I mess up then I could be demoted even lower or worst-case scenario, I would be put to death. Marty just continued to hold me and rub soothing circles on my back as I clutched onto him.

After a couple of minutes I finally calmed down and Marty sat me down. I sat crossed leg on the floor as Marty walked away. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. Where was he going? He disappeared from my sight but quickly came back with a piece of black fabric in his hands. His notepad was in his hands as he wrote another note.

When he reached me he handed me his note and it read: Everything is going to be okay. You are going to perform with a blindfold- it will help, trust me.