seven

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ryland's pov

the next morning i woke up an hour after my alarm, feeling tired and angry. shane's lips being so close to mine had triggered this emotion inside me to completely indoctrinate the rest of my body and i'd been seething ever since he'd pulled away. sleepily, i dragged myself out of bed and stumbled towards my closet, pulling out a pale blue t shirt and some black adidas sweatpants.

laying the clothes out on the toilet seat, i turned the shower on and began brushing my teeth as i waited for the water to warm up. everything about last night was running through my mind at such a rate that it almost gave me a headache, the sheer memory of his fingertips dancing across my cheek making me clench my fists. stepping into the shower, i sighed as the hot water slid down my back, kissing my skin as it ran down my shoulder blades. everything ached. all i wanted to do was stay cooped up in my room forever, yet i knew that by now everyone would be downstairs and there was no way to hide or grab my coffee in privacy like i usually do. i began to lather the strawberry shampoo into my hair with thoughts of how pretty shane's lips had looked inked into my mind, dipping my head back and watching as bubbles of soap swam circles around my feet and i wished to disappear.

twenty minutes later, once i'd begrudgingly gotten out the shower changed into the clean clothes, i ran a hand through my freshly dried hair and groaned under my breath. today was not going to be easy, i knew that already. pacing around my room, i applied a little carmex chapstick and pulled on some white ankle socks, sliding my contacts in carefully like i do every morning. my heart was scratching against my ribs as i did so, knowing that with each moment passed i was growing closer to having to see him.

finally, when there was nothing else i could do to procrastinate the morning any further, i trudged downstairs and into the kitchen, barely looking up. i flipped the espresso machine on, and in autopilot mode, began to make my coffee, still having scenes from the night before engraved into my eyesight.

"ah, ryland. you finally woke up." my dad chimed, sticking his head round kitchen door and smiling widely. "there's breakfast on the table. come eat."

weakly, i nodded and turned back to my coffee, watching as the ice cubes grew smaller and smaller. with the single thought of why didn't he kiss me playing continuously through my head, i picked up my glass and made my way into the kitchen, resenting the way everyone's eyes fell on me.

"morning honey. come sit down!" my mom cheerfully greeted, gesturing to the only free chair from across the table. the one directly next to shane.

"for fucks sake." i muttered under my breath, pulling out the chair beside the auburn boy who's eyes were staring into my figure, burning my skin. i didn't look back.

my dad frowned. "what did you say, ryland?"

"just saying what good luck it is that mom made us fruit cake." i answered with a monotone voice, cutting a small slice and placing it on my plate, ignoring shane's stare as i took a sip of my iced coffee.

my brother looked pretty presentable for someone who had gotten absolutely wasted last night, his dark brown hair neatly pushed back from his eyes that had slight dark circles underneath them. he was digging into his bowl of cereal, chatting amicably with shane about someone at the party last night. shane was humming back, throwing in a few 'yeah's and 'i agree's in a feeble attempt to make it appear as though he was actually listening. but his gaze didn't stray from me; i could feel his eyes boring into my back and i wanted to spin around and scream at him to just stop.

i didn't want to look at him. but i did.

he was still wearing that green shirt from last night; the one that had brushed against my skin as he leaned in to kiss me. as he pulled away to stop. sipping his coffee – hot, not iced like mine – he crinkled his eyes shut slightly, running his hands through his hair as though he'd just gotten out of bed himself.

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