thirteen

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ryland's pov

"so garrett tells me you're secretly sleeping with some guy in school."

the red head across from me commented with a grin and i slapped the back of my best friend's head, looking at his newly-crowned boyfriend with pink cheeks. my sexuality had never really been discussed between garrett and i, but i had an inkling he knew i liked boys since he often referred to my 'secret' – garrett's fun way of describing whatever i was doing with my life – as a him.

"so garrett tells me his mom walked in on him fucking you." i mimicked, raising an eyebrow and watching as the boy's cheeks darkened until they matched the colour of his hair.

andrew and garrett have been dating for quite a few weeks now, their friends with benefit status that sparked over a maths project swiftly morphing into a heavy, fast paced relationship. i'd never seen garrett so happy, and after being introduced to andrew the two of us have become close. although younger than us, he seems mature for his age and a little shy, which suits me down to the ground since it was in my nature to be exactly the same.

yet, despite all this, a part of me is so ridiculously jealous of the pair's openness with not just each other but the whole entire world. the fact that they can so easily hold hands with each other in the hallways or post photos of themselves on instagram without a thousand judgemental looks was purely euphoric to me - i knew it would never happen between shane and i. this very fact sent envy coursing through my veins.

"shut up, ryland, you asshole." the blonde boy beside me playfully teased and nudged my shoulder.

i rolled my eyes in return, hoping that the matter of my implicit love life was staying well and truly quiet, and began to pick at my lettuce. we were sat in the canteen eating our lunches in a feeble attempt to grasp some warmth before heading to our next class, bodies gathered around a circular plastic table that had permanent marker scrawled across it. the crisp november air seemed to engulf our school, amplified by the fact that the boiler was constantly on the blink and provided little salvation from the freezing winter weather.

the three of us, huddled in oversized sweatshirts and skinny jeans, had been discussing the latest gossip at my school before the topic had drizzled into my love life. the grapevine was ripe with rumours about my brother and his girlfriend – katie – breaking up, to which i knew nothing of, since apparently he had slept with some senior volleyball player over thanksgiving weekend. i couldn't help but roll my eyes when i found out – in the last month austin has become this unapproachable wrecking ball that even i don't dare disturb – so this act of disloyalty only confirmed my suspicions of him going off the rails over the next few months.

"why don't you just tell us, ry." garrett pleaded, elongating the last syllable of my name and giving me wide puppy dog eyes. one hand of his was enlaced with andrew's atop of the canteen table whilst the other scrolled through his twitter home page.

i shot him a warning glance, not wanting to continue the conversation any further. "because it's none of your business, lover boys. leave my love life out of you gossip." my comment made andrew smile softly and look down shyly at the table, his dark brown eyes shining humorously.

"oh my god!" both mine and andrew's heads snapped up to the exclaiming boy with confusion. "katie just posted a picture of her and chad halton at starbucks saying lunch date. you know, the guy who played danny in grease? lunch date! your brother is going to fucking kill him, haven't they fought before? oh no! the last time your brother got into a fight he was nearly suspended." garrett rambled, his eyes wide and surprised that my brother's placid girlfriend could just as vindictive as her boyfriend.

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