I Need You (Min Yoongi X Depressed Reader)

Affection

At 9:46am I am discharged from the hospital. Walking out those doors was quite a scary feeling, I was released back into the world to live my life once more. I feel very conflicted, like something is sitting at the bottom of my stomach, it's because I haven't told the boy's that I've been discharged. They'll be disappointed right? That I didn't tell them, that I just left without a word but for some reason I couldn't bring myself to do it. I feel as though they are mad at me, maybe not mad but they have to feel some sort of hatred towards me because of what I tried to do. 

I arrive home. As soon as I open the door I expect everything to be a mess but to my surprise it isn't, it's been cleaned. The floors look as though they have been vacuumed and the windows have been wiped. The couch is neat and the rubbish that I had left on the ground had been picked up as well. Not only that, my kitchen was stocked with food, drinks, anything you could think of, I've never seen it this full before. I then entered the bathroom, I expected to see dried blood stained on the cold tiles and maybe reminiscence of water but no, there was nothing, it was spotless. It looked as though nothing had happened, that I had never did what I did. 

I sit against the wall, my thighs hitting the tiles sending shivers up my spine as memories of that day suddenly flood my head. I look at my wrist, still stitched and bandaged. I could pull them out and this time I would probably die, it would all be over but I don't think I want that, not anymore at least. My mind has been so fuzzy since that day, I don't know what I want anymore. I don't know how I can continue to keep going as it had never happened, that's what all the doctors were saying, to forget was best. I don't know if I can though and god what I put those poor boys through, imagine how they are feeling, how they must of felt. 

*Bang* *Bang*

I jump a little to the sudden noise coming from the door. I stand up quickly and make my way to see who it is. I open the door and it's Yoongi, seeing his face again makes my heart jolt, in a good way of course. 

"Hey Yoongi" My voice is very quiet, I feel melancholy yet happy as well.

"Why didn't you tell me you left the hospital?" He seems hurt, it's in the tone of his voice. 

I walk away from the door and I plop myself down on the couch and I cross my legs, he sit's next to me, so close. 

"I'm....I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I don't know why, I just left not really thinking about anything" 

"I understand I guess"

There's an uneasy feeling in the air and honestly I don't know what to say.

"I came by and cleaned your apartment. I hope it's okay" 

I smile brightly because of his efforts for me. "You cleaned it? Thank you, I really appreciate the help. I'm sorry you had to clean the bathroom though, I should've been the one to do that" and once again the feeling is uneasy.

"It's not a problem really, it was better to just get it over and done with" 

"Still..." He cuts me off. 

"You know Y/n I read the letter your left" 

"Oh..you did?" I look away, suddenly I feel as though I shouldn't be looking at him. "I'm sorry"

"Please don't be sorry, just know you are not a nuisance, you are not annoying, you are not hated, you do not cause conflict, you did not ruin our career, you make people happy, you are kind, you are funny, you are talented, you are intelligent and I love you. You hear that? I fucking love you so much and I am never going to let you go again" 

"Yoongi... I love you to" I can't help but smile at this moment in time, everything negative seems to fall away like it's nothing.

"On that note I forgot to tell you, BigHit figured out who was stalking us and who released the article"