My Brother's Best Friend

Chapter Twenty-Six

It's a fine Sunday morning and I wake up to the smell of bleach and other cleaning products. There is loud music playing from the living room and I instantly know what time it is—not literally but figuratively. It is time to do a little cleaning around the house—or in my mama's case, a lot of cleaning. My mother is the type of person to clean something that has already been cleaned. I will wash the dishes and wipe down the countertops and she will do it all over again because she swears I don't do it right. I am surprised she hasn't woken me up yet. Maybe she was just giving me some rest before she decides to work me to death.

I go into the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. I don't even bother changing out of my clothes and taking a shower because I'm going to get all dirty from cleaning anyway. As soon as I came home last night, I changed out of my dress and into my night clothes. I didn't want to wear Fergie's clothes home because I didn't want my parents to get any ideas—in case they were up waiting for me. I can never get anything pass my father; he was waiting for me but my mother was knocked out. Devin hadn't even come home on time, but he didn't get any crap for it. I'm so tired of double standards and being scolded for certain things a guy gets rewarded for.

I walk pass the living room and into the kitchen to grab a cereal bar out of the pantry. It's not a fulfilling breakfast, but it'll do for now. After I finish eating it, I go back into the living room where my mama is wiping off the wooden furniture. She has on a headscarf and a raggedy shirt with bleach stains on it. That's how she typically looks when she's cleaning the house, she doesn't care about anything else.

"Is yo brother woke yet?" She asks, raising her eyebrows.

"Nope, I don't think so." I shake my head. Or at least I didn't hear him on my way to the kitchen.

"Go tell him to get up so y'all can get to cleaning." She says.

"Devin, Mama said wake up so we can start cleaning!" I walk to the archway of the living room and yell out for my brother.

"I coulda did that myself." She snickers.

"Well, you told me to wake him up. You never said how." I laugh, shrugging my shoulders. "Where Daddy at?"

"In our room cleaning out the closest." She states. "Matter of fact, that's what you can start off doing. Go through all the clothes in your closet. Whatever you cain't fit we throwing out or giving away to charity."

"Okay." I nod my head.

I walk back to my bedroom, harshly knocking on Devin's on the way. I hear him groan and mutter a bunch of curse words. As much as Devin annoys me and gives me problems, I have to return the favor every once in a while. Chuckling to myself, I check my phone before getting started on my room. I have a good morning text from Fergie. It instantly makes me smile because Fergie has had such a positive impact on me. I can't imagine what it'd be like not talking to him.

After a successful day of cleaning, I finally take a shower and lay down. I feel like I haven't had any time to myself these past couple of days. Don't get me wrong, it feels great hanging out with Fergie and my friends, but sometimes I feel alone in a crowded room. I feel overwhelmed and it's like their company suffocates me. I can't really explain the importance of spending time by yourself; I just know that it is vital to keeping your mental health stable. 

The only downside to being alone is that it makes me think about everything. Anyone can see that Tamara is a toxic friend, but I just don't want to throw away all those years of friendship. I wonder what's her problem. We have never really had a problem until she told everyone that I like Fergie. I don't know if she likes him or if she has never really liked me, but she needs to get over herself. I know it's not good to keep her around. One minute she's hot and one minute she's cold. Our friendship will be fine one day, and then it's like a war takes place. It just sucks that things have to be like this. I know that if it's tearing me apart like this, then I don't need this kind of negativity in my life. Why can't I just let her go? Why do I always have to give people the benefit of the doubt and see the good in them?

Tomorrow is Monday, and I am definitely not looking forward to going to school. I'm so fed up with everything. I'm just as tired as can be. And it all starts over again tomorrow.