The Scarred One... (Germanyx Oc Character)

Chapter VllI: Outcast

Chapter VIII: Outcast

Eragon

"I don't know if You can hear me;

Or if You're even there.

I don't know if You would listen,

To a poor boy's prayer.

Yes, I know I'm just an outcast;

I shouldn't speak to you.

Still I see Your face and wonder...

Were You once an outcast too?

God help the outcasts,

hungry from birth.

Show them the mercy

they don't find on earth.

God help my people,

we look to You still.

God help the outcasts,

or nobody will.

I ask for nothing.

I can get by;

But I know so many

less lucky than I.

Please help my people;

The poor and down-trod.

I thought we all were

the children of God...

God help the outcasts,

Children of God..."

Tears pour down my cold, flush cheeks as the lights dim and the curtains close. The Principle wanted me to speak at an assembly as a first hand account on bullying, which infuriated me at first, but after a moment, I returned to my normal emotional state; sad and heartless, so I accepted.

This is the first time anyone has asked anything of me, and I can generally say that I have never felt worse about my life. He knew what I did was not of bullying, but yet he forced me to further expose myself to the world. Now I'm going to be known as the gay, whore, with a lady voice; do I care though? No, I stopped caring years ago.

So, for the rest of the day, I decided to 'get sick' and skip my classes by going to the nurses office and up chucking my breakfast in the bathroom. It felt weird actually having food in me; Germany's mom had forced me to eat, so I just ate some toast. The plush, mint colored medical bed thingy comforts my tired body as I lie there, not stirring once; sleeping in a dreamless existence when a familiar breath wakes me  slowly.

"Are you okay Eragon?" His soft, warm voice penetrates my silence easily as his fingers dance across my forehead, moving some of my hair out of my eyes. I just turn over to the opposite side, having my back be towards the German.

"go away... just... let me be..." I whisper softly as more tears begin to fall from my eyes for reasons I just... don't know. Instead of doing what I said, Ludwig walks around to the side I was facing and kneels down in front of my face, gently taking my cold hand in his. I just close my eyes and try holding my breath until I pass out; but what stops me is the soft pressing of lips against mine. I don't know why, but in the end, I kiss back slightly before letting him dominate like everyone else has done to me; conceal, don't feel.

He sighs after realizing what I did and backs away slightly, not removing his hands from mine. "Eragon... I know how... tough it may be for you, but... just know zhat I-I love you... And I von't ever... hurt you... I von't ever screw you." He whispers into my ear before kissing my neck softly, sending... something I-I haven't felt in- in a long time. I sigh softly and smile slightly at this feeling before returning to sadness. Ludwig had noticed my brief mood swing and he smiled too.

"Why..." I ask quietly, snuggling my head into the pillow; sleep seems so... peaceful right now. Something my life has never been.

"Because-" He rubs my arms softly. "I- I care for you. I vant to help you. But for right now, rest. Rest..." And with that, my eyes shut, and my weightless body drifts off into the tides of emptiness. For once, I didn't dream of all those times of being hurt; of being alone. Instead, I dreamed of Ludwig, and his lips against neck; pressing down gently, sending me into a place I never felt before. Making my body shiver in anticipation, my lips long for his. I felt loved.

When I awake, my eyes slowly open and hone in to my surroundings. Light blue walls, white curtains and bed coverings... Ludwig's guest bed room. With all the airy colors, I feel as if I'm in heaven. It's so relaxing and tranquil; I feel as if my heart is actually beating... properly, if that makes any sense.

"Eragon?" A soft voice floats in through the wooden door. "Dinner's done, hun. Come on out and eat something." Ludwig's mom is so nice... I don't deserve any of their hospitality, nor Ludwig's love. I mean, looking at me, you don't exactly think that I'm 'lover material' since a new guy practically raped me every week. 

After a moment of nothing, I finally get up and walk over to the door slowly. My body is so shot, it feels as if my legs will give way at any second. Surprisingly, I make it down the stairs in one piece. Surely, I thought I was going to pass out going down them and probably land in Ludwig's arms knowing how movie work; the handsome guy just there at the right time to catch the girls and wisp them away into a land of unknown with a single kiss. Funny this is, the only thing I've felt in Ludwig's kisses is sadness and in the end, worse about myself.

I feel as if I'm just going to be tossed aside in the end; that I'm not worth a single persons love. That I'm just worth what people will pay for me. It's not fair for me... it's never been and this is how it always will be.

Ludwig

'He's pale- really pale.' Zhat's all that fills mien mind as ve all eat. It vas uncomfortably quite zhis evening. Mother and Father knows zhat Prussia hates Eragon; and zhat he's glaring at Eragon from across the table. Eragon sits zhere eating slowly as if he's afraid to make to much noise or he'll be yelled and here I am, trying to fathom vhat's happening. Vhat nobody else sees, is a small tear zhat wuickly drops and lands in his water, creating a subtle, but big ripple in his glass. Zhis has got to change.

"So, dad, vhat's new?" I ask trying to sturr up conversation and relieve the obvious tension in zhe air. He looks at me confused, zhen nods as he takes a fork full of pasta.

"Well... Oh! Me and your mother were ionvited to a wedding next week so you guys will have to fend for yourselves for a ouple of days." His eyes dart to me and Prussia's. "No parties!" He zhen said firmly vhich caused Prussia to groan and roll his eyes; I just looked to Eragon, still silent as zhe grave. Gently, mien hand grasps his under the table, causing him to look up at me vith zhoughs beautiful eyes of amber. How could someone so beautiful and so... special hurt so much? You can see how sensitive he is, how loving and caring he is. Vhy vould you vant to hurt someone like him?

"Not even a little one!?" PRussia wines in zhe background. I just vant to reach over and slap him. "Come one! How can you say no to me!?"

"We are your parents, we can say whatever we want." 

"May I be excused?" Eragon says randomly right as Prussia was about to speak. Zhis caught us all off guard and put us back on edge again. I look to his face and see he's holding something back; I have to talk to him. Holding eveyzhing in... it's just, not good for you.

"Sure, yes hun. Anytime." Mother said looking to him, and vith zhat, he gets up and leaves. And with him gone, Prussia starts up again.

"Vhat is zhat zhing doing here?" He asks rudely; my face burning up in anger. I can hear the fast footsteps up zhe stairs and zhe slamming of a door; Eragon heard zhat.

I'm going to fricken kill Prussia!