YOUTH. | JK | COMPLETE

love

EASILY
BRUNO MAJOR

Don't you tell me that it wasn't meant to be
Call it quits
Call it destiny
Just because it won't come easily
Doesn't mean we shouldn't try

Jeongguk is just getting out of the shower when he hears a knock at the door. It's four in the morning, and he knows the only person it could possibly be is Taehyung. His heart drops into his stomach at the thought of Taehyung, weighed down with guilt. There was something more behind Taehyung's panic as he left. Something more than a mistake, some reason why the blood drained from his face. There was hurt mixed in with realization, and although Jeongguk is oblivious to most things, he has a sickening feeling that the kiss meant more to Taehyung than it did to him.

The kiss. Yet another guilty weight added to Jeongguk's burdened heart. He feels so unbelievably dirty for kissing Taehyung, and feels even more grimy because he liked it. Though he knows Haneul had another man in her apartment, and was probably doing something similar with him, he can't get over how wrong it all feels. The cherry on top of the entire situation is how he recognizes how much easier his life would be if he just continued kissing Taehyung. How they would be good together, how it would be so much less heartache to be with him rather than with Haneul.

This is what Jeongguk is thinking about as he walks to the door in nothing but his sweatpants, toweling his damp raven hair dry. He unbolts the door and opens it, still not mentally prepared to see Taehyung. But he's even more unprepared to see Haneul standing before him. He doesn't even try to hide his utter disbelief, pouty lips parted in surprise, doe eyes wide. Haneul puts on half a smile, clearly nervous. A million questions race through Jeongguk's mind. The silence between him and Haneul has never been awkward before, but now, it's dense and uncomfortable and suffocating, and Jeongguk can't bear it anymore, so he blurts, "Where are your pants?"

Haneul looks taken off guard, looking down at her attire. The oversized gray tee she's wearing almost reaches mid thigh, and there is no fabric hiding the tan skin of her legs before her feet disappear into fuzzy slippers. Jeongguk internally kicks himself, because that might just be the most idiotic thing he's ever said, not to mention the most irrelevant to the situation. Out of all the logical questions he had been thinking, of course his brain decides to malfunction. It doesn't help the tension, either, to his dismay.

"Right here." Haneul answers finally, lifting up the hem of her shirt to reveal pajama shorts. There are little dogs with Santa hats on them, though Christmas is not for months. Jeongguk wants to take the towel he was drying his hair with and hide underneath it at this point, not knowing what to do. Somehow Haneul's Christmas dog shorts make her even more endearing to him. He's not happy with her, but she still makes his heart melt. "Do you take showers at 4 AM often?" She blurts this time, because apparently the silence is equally as unbearable for her as it is for him. Jeongguk raises his eyebrows incredulously, before realizing he's standing before her shirtless for the first time. His body is something he is confident in, but Haneul's eyes on him make him nervous. Heat rises to his cheeks, somehow managing to feel shyness mixed in with all the other emotions he's experiencing. Relief, because she's here. Anger, because she's here. Hope, because he's hopelessly in love with her. Hurt, because he's so hopelessly in love with her and she might not feel the same way.

"When I have a lot to think about, yes." He answers quietly. Haneul winces as this, knowing that she contributed to Jeongguk's long list of things to think about. "Why are you here?" He asks, brain finally cooperating enough to say something intelligent.

"To explain. To...apologize." Haneul says softly. "Can I come in?" Sighing, Jeongguk knows his decision has been made by his soft heart before his brain even has a chance to consider it. He swings the door open wider, and she steps inside. His apartment is nothing like her own. It lacks the sense of what makes a house a home—no personal touches, no art on the walls, nothing that reflects Jeongguk's personality. Simple furniture, no TV. Hundreds of books are stacked neatly against the far wall, the only sign that the apartment is lived in at all. Jeongguk busies himself making some tea on the stove as Haneul looks around. She runs her fingertips delicately over the spines of the books, reading the titles.