Hi Lovelies,
I am trying to create a first line that will be forever remembered. Please comment on which one you like best.
New Chapter 1: Prince Charming First Line / Example A
A nightmare is a fear your brain exaggerates to wake you from your sleep.
That's what Cinderella would sing if she watched her daddy die in a crash. Like I did. Except she wouldn't be singing every morning, she would be screaming. Or crying.
Because no matter how hard I tried to forget, the memories always haunted my dreams. Especially on Daddy's birthday. I woke with a scream trapped in my throat, my fingers still clawing at the phantom seatbelt. My heart pounded against my chest in a futile attempt to escape from its bony cage.
I sat up and peered through the darkness at little Hannah Hoover, my newest foster sister, in the twin bed next to mine. Did I wake her again?
She blinked, turned over, and went back to sleep.
Not me. I knew if I closed my eyes, I would see Daddy's face streaked with blood, hear him whisper his last words, "Forever. Remember."
OR
If you don't really like the part about Cinderella.
Another New Chapter 1: Prince Charming First Line/ Example B
No matter how hard I tried to forget, the memories always haunted my dreams. Especially on Daddy's birthday.
I woke with a scream trapped in my throat, my fingers still clawing at the phantom seatbelt. My heart pounded against my chest in a futile attempt to escape from its bony cage. I sat up and peered through the darkness at little Hannah Hoover, my newest foster sister, in the twin bed next to mine. Did I wake her again?
She blinked, turned over, and went back to sleep.
Not me. I knew if I closed my eyes, I would see Daddy's face streaked with blood, hear him whisper his last words, "Forever. Remember."
OR
Original Chapter 1: Prince Charming First Line/ Example C
I sat up in bed with the haunting scream trapped in my throat. My hands still clawed at the phantom seatbelt, and my heart pounded against my chest in a futile attempt to escape from its bony cage. I peered through the darkness at little Hannah Hoover, my newest foster sister, in the twin bed next to mine. Did I wake her again?
She blinked, turned over, and went back to sleep.
Not me. I knew if I closed my eyes, I would see my daddy's face streaked with blood, hear him whisper his last words, "Forever. Remember."
I couldn't forget, even if I wanted to.
Which Example do you like best? A, B, or C?
Thanks for your help.
Forever Remember to Live, Laugh, and Love! - 3L
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