Holding On & Letting Go [✓] (Boyxboy)

Chapter Nineteen

Our return to Los Angeles lasted a full twenty-four hours before we were back in an SUV on our way to the airport. The car had made a round trip to each of our houses and by five-thirty in the morning, we were pulling up at the entrance to the airport and being herded inside.

Our flight was scheduled early in the morning so that we could catch up to the time-zone in Milan. Jet lag was inevitable but our hours of work were long and it would be even harder without a proper rest period.

Thankfully, our flight had no delays and we were on board within the hour. This time I didn't take any pills as sleep quickly overcame me once again.

Halfway through the flight I started watching a movie with Brendon, quickly shooting down the idea of any romance movies. When the meals were handed out, Claire scowled at my lack of appetite. She had even managed to secure premium meals for the models but that was Claire for you.

We landed in the late afternoon and despite my nap on the plane, the time difference really took a toll. Sienna's head rested on my shoulder as she slept beside me on our ride to the hotel.

The company had arranged for us to stay at the Rosa Grand Milano, a hotel only minutes from this year's venue, Palazzo Reale.  It's regality stood tall and vibrant, but we were too tired to appreciate the beauty in its architecture.

Once we had settled into our rooms, we had the rest of the day to relax given that the shows didn't start for two days. This time I didn't have a roommate and as much as I hated to acknowledge it, the loneliness was loud in my room.

A knock on the door sounded in the evening and was pushed open to reveal Claire. I sat up on my bed and stared at her. "Hi."

"Everyone's heading downstairs for dinner. We'd love for you to join us." Claire said.

"I'm not really hungry." I replied honestly.

Claire gave me a look. "You know how I feel about you not eating. Especially before a show."

"The show isn't for two days."

Claire only stared at me and I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. "I'm just tired."

My director pointed to the bed. "May I?"

"Sure."

She sat down beside me. "You wanna tell me what's really going on?"

"What?"

Claire looked at me unintelligibly. "You haven't been yourself since we left New York, and I'm not the only one whose noticed it. What's on your mind, Troye?"

"I don't really want to talk about it."

Claire nodded. "Okay, I respect that. But if I may, I think I know what it's about."

I didn't respond and Claire took that as her cue. "Jack."

I turned my head away. "It's nothing."

"I know something's going on with you." my boss said. "And I just want you to know that I'm here if you need to talk about it with someone."

I bit my lip, closing my eyes. "I just don't know what to do."

"About?"

I sighed, opening my eyes again. "We just seem to be on different pages lately. I don't know where that leaves us."

"Maybe being on different pages isn't such a bad thing." Claire suggested. "After all, not everyone is going to have the same story as you. You're bound to have different chapters."