I Walk the Line ♤ (gxg)

chapter 30: loving you

The drunk August tripped over her own feet as the woman pulled her up the stairs too fast for her to handle.

Willow led them to a room, and August could barely comprehend anything or even keep her eyes fully open while the woman opened the door and swung the girl inside more roughly than she should've, releasing her grip on her wrist at the wrong moment and sending the drunk girl falling onto the carpeted floor of what looked like a bedroom. August felt her skin crawl at the sound of the door slamming shut so hard that the walls shook. She didn't even want to look up at the woman who she could feel was standing over her and staring at her with demon eyes.

August groaned, picking her numb body off the floor and standing to her feet, not without stumbling a few times. She breathed hard, placing her left hand over her right elbow which had hit the ground kind of hard. She could feel her knees trembling, her fingers quivering as she stared at the floor, avoiding the woman's stare. She blinked nervously, flinching as she felt the woman take a few steps closer to her.

Willow froze, seeing the girl's reaction. Suddenly, all her anger that had been pulsing through her suddenly shattered like a glass wall that had been broken, the entire structure falling to the ground in a heap. Her eyes softened as she stared at the trembling girl who fearfully avoided her stare.

"August," she spoke, her voice coming out clipped and causing the girl to twitch. "I'm not going to hurt you," Willow said a little more gently, clenching her jaw. "No matter how incredibly pissed I may be."

"Pissed?" August mumbled, looking up at her as she ignored the forming bruise on her elbow. "I'm the only one that deserves to be pissed here," her voice lowered threateningly, a tone Willow was shocked to hear come from the girl whose gaze hardened. She didn't know if it was the alcohol injecting the girl with blind bravery or if she just wasn't afraid of the woman anymore.

"Don't be so selfish," Willow spoke firmly, but still in a calm voice.

"Selfish..." August repeated, suddenly feeling almost completely sober. "I'm the one who's selfish here?"

"Yes, August. After the stunt you pulled in Texas, I've realized your mentality of the world is that it revolves around you," Willow snapped, her cool green eyes digging under August's.

August took a step closer. "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" she began, so many words forming in her head that she almost felt overwhelmed. Nonetheless, she spoke with clarity and anger. "You are the one who, first of all, plucked me from my life by kidnapping me, physically abusing me and throwing me around like some toy, then you just leave me on the fucking road in Texas like I'm trash you just discarded."

"You wanted me to leave," Willow quickly retorted, her eyes narrowing. "And you already know why I had to kidnap you. The fact that you don't understand is what makes you so fucking selfish." Willow took a step closer, and she could see August's confidence visibly falter as the girl realized just how much the woman towered over her, her stone cold eyes boring into hers as she took in Willow's unceasingly controlling composure.

The woman oozed power and authority that made even the feisty August step down as her voice lowered. "You wouldn't even give yourself a chance to believe me when I told you that I was not planning on killing you. Yes, in the beginning I was, but you were no more to me than a fucking mouth that would say something to somebody and end up getting me and my gang killed. What I did and what I planned was to protect myself. And you must be one lucky bastard that I didn't shoot you that day in the cave. You have seen my dark side, but you have seen more of my mercy than anyone on this earth ever has. I allowed you, a risk in my safety, to continue to live. I even gave you freedom. I allowed you to go back to Texas to see your family, to sleep without handcuffs while I slept next to you with a loaded gun in the same room. You could have easily ran away or killed me in my sleep. I gave you more freedom and showed you more vulnerability than I have to anyone else in this world. I fell in love with you, August." Her voice cracked, and the woman bit her lip and inwardly cursed at her eyes for threatening to spill over with tears. "I fell in love with you, but you saw a stupid fucking text from the dumbfuck Darragh, overreacted, and wouldn't even give me a chance to explain myself. You acted like I was the monster you met that night in the alleyway, not the person who loved you and protected you and changed just for you." Willow turned away, her chest heaving up and down as her trouble eyes stared mindlessly at the floor. She ran a hand through her black waves. "The most selfish thing in the world is to treat someone who has truly changed just for you, as if they are really a monster."