𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐁𝐋𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐊𝐄

𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐮

LET ME HOLD YOU, BABY

it was friday. today they would see eachother again after weeks of wet dreams and longing to see their faces. jaxon was ready to see her, ready to work things out, ready to listen to her. he wanted to understand why she was so fucking insecure. he had so much time to think about why she was so eager to fuck him that he figured out she was insecure, according to his own brain.

on the other hand, alejiah was actually scared. she knew she was gonna have to give it up to him because he breaks her walls like a big ass wrecking ball. she needed that, though. no nigga ever gave a fuck about anything but how fast they could get her face down, ass up. she was beginning to realize that that shit's disgusting, she was disgusting. she was beginning to want to go find every nigga that used her and ask "why?", but alejiah knew why.

she walked to her bathroom and wiped off the eye cream that she had applied earlier due to having deep eye bags. she picked at her mane and decided to get a move-on to jaxon's dorm in a oversized grey nike sweatsuit with red crocs on her feet.

she walked through the halls with her head filled with random worried thoughts. she trips overs the looseness of her crocs multiple times before finally reaching his door and knocking.

she make up a little dance with her toes until she hears a "coming!" before the door starts to open.

"oh wow," the milky boy was quite shocked at how underdressed she was. the way she looked up at him with slight regret filling her eyes put cracks in his already fragile heart. he should've been more prepared to actually look her in the face, he thought he was, imagining her showing up at the door as her usually confident, outspoken self. instead she stands here, looking like a fucking trainwreck. he really wasn't prepared to see her like this.

"i know, i look terrible. can i come in?"

"yeah, please." he stepped back to leave a wider space for her to walk thru, closing the door once she had entered.

when she walks in she notices a tiny bluetooth speaker lowly playing smooth r&b that she had probably been crying to these past couple weeks.

she takes a seat on his loveseat, squished into the arm of it, trying to stay as distant from his body as possible.

he sits as well on the other side. "how are you, alejiah?" she turns her head to give him a looking saying "really, nigga?"

"what do you think, smart ass?"

"still got your sass i see."

they both laughed for while until their tummies hurt.

with a once again sad face, alejiah spoke.

"i really really missed you," she stared forcefully into his eyes, scaring him just a tad bit. "i fucked things up so bad for us and i hope you know how sorry i am babe."

"i accept any apology you send, but i just wanna talk about this whole situation a little more, jiah. what's wrong?"

"oh.." she was kinda fucked at this point. she thought she could get away with just a simple sorry and they'd be right back where they were. she knew damn well jaxon louis wasn't like that, he clearly gave a fuck. she wished he didn't. "i guess we can, um, i guess i just thought you wanted me sexually. that's usually the deal with your species."

"you aren't wrong, jiah, trust me, but we practically just met. i mean, you are completely and utterly captivating and i am drawn to you in every goddam way. when the time does come, i do want you to be my first, here in this new space. god, i wish you were my last and all this shit you got going on, i can be here for you. i can hold you and dance with you and sit by you, if anything. we could be so good, alejiah. you just need to tell me what's up and i'll listen. i only want you, baby."

"i'm trying to open up about all this dumbass shit that i go thru, but it's really hard when it's all my fucking fault, jaxon," she could feel herself starting to crumble, still trying to keep a hard exterior. "you know why all those bitch ass niggas used me so easily?"

jaxon sat quietly, not knowing what the hell to say. she was very well scaring him at this point by how loud she had gotten.

"because i fucking let them! i liked that shit! i wanted it!" tears starting to cloud her vision.

"alejiah, you can still change, you can forgive yourself and move on."

"how am i just supposed to forgive myself? how am i supposed to forgive myself after i brought this all on you? forcing you to do what i wanted, assuming you wanted it because i don't use my fucking brain. i fucking hurt you, probably the best thing i've ever had and i hurt you." a light sob slipped out of her mouth that would lead to many more.

jaxon moved to the cushion next to the weeping angel and wrapped his arms around her slouched form, letting her turn into his chest. "you still have me, jiah. i'm still here."
he squeezes her a bit tighter as her tears continue to fall.

"i don't get it," she lifts her head up so her slighty bloodshot big brown eyes were visible to him. "how are you so sweet and adorable? how do i get to find someone like you? i don't even deserve y-"

jax moves his hands to her face and wipes her tears then leaning in to kiss to her forehead. he was trying to shut her up. "how about we just dance?" smiling a reminiscent smile.

"well, okay when you look at me like that.."

he stand ups first, pulling her up gently afterwards. dancing was their thing, that's how they met. they were both decent and comfortable so they could really do it anytime, any place. the song was since way back by partynextdoor & drake. it was slow, just enough for them to find themselves glued to eachother and the rhythm. they once again became one, like puzzle pieces. she fit her head into the crook of his neck, her hand also resting on his thiqq arms. his hands are on the curve of her waist and back. her legs in between his, allowing both of them to grind into eachother whenever they felt the need to. jaxon could feel her breath on his neck that turned into a small kiss from her lips as he closed his eyes to enjoy this unforgettable moment.

it was in this moment that alejiah had an epiphany.

this was sex.

yall ever had sad sex? how she felt right now was how she felt when she got her pussy beaten up after she had just been crying in the club. the desire and tension that was exchanged constantly between their two bodies was relieved when they pushed up against each other in the least sexual of ways. they only pushed to try to somehow be closer to one another. she just wanted to be near him and vice versa.

"alejiah," jaxon's deep raspy voice interrupted her thoughts.

"yes, baby." she takes her head off of his shoulder to look up at him, already staring down at her with his hazelnut spread irises.

"i hope you know, you can't scare me away at this point."

"i think i've realized, jax."

"good. i promise i'm not going anywhere." he peppered kisses all over her face just missing her lips.

"okay, i like you, lil' nigga."

"mm, i like you, too, my lil' jiah."

and they danced the night away...

the gif is cute as fooock hehe also i keep coming up with more food to describe their eyes dhdj i'm sorry that it's 3:24am lmfaoo

tbh i like how this is going and the reads on here keep going up rapidly and i want to cry 🥺