Lip Gloss And Leather Jackets || Completed

EIGHT || Communication Saves The Day

EIGHT || Communication Saves The Day

When you're sad, things tend to jumble up in your memory. You begin to grow unsure of when something happened, or even if they really happened at all. For example; I keep replaying the scene in my mind but there's something so unreal about it.

A hand on my back makes me jump. "Hey, kiddo. What's got you so sad?" Aunt Xena sits down next to me, and I look at her. At least I still have someone. My fingers slip through the loops in my shoelaces, tugging them tighter.

"Nothing much. Just drama." A sob snags in my throat.

This isn't just drama. This is my amazing friendship falling apart after ten years, all because of me. This is what I've wanted slipping through my fingers once I've finally got it. This is me, me, me, ruining everything because I was too caught up in myself.

And now Maxine and Eden are gone. The shoelaces unravel when I tug them too hard, turning into a knot. Aunt Xena rubs my back, the knot refusing to budge even when I press my nails into the fabric.

"Hey, come on. I know a liar when I see one." Her attempt to make me laugh coaxes a pathetic smile out of me, but it only lasts a second. "Talk to me about it."

So I do. I don't go into detail, certainly not with the Jaxon bet or my crush on Maxine. But she gets the gist of it, nodding and offering a sympathetic smile. It's all wrong. The words are pouring out of me like a river but it's all so wrong.

"So talk to her about it," she advices, "just talk things out, you know? I'm sure she'll understand if you just tell her what really happened..." She doesn't get a chance to finish her sentence.

"It's not like that." Even though she clearly wants to speak, Aunt Xena stays silent. It's one of the things I like about her. "This isn't some shojo manga where the problems are from misunderstandings. This is my fault." And Jaxon's fault. "If I were her, I wouldn't forgive me either."

"But you're not her, honey. If you just talked to her... apologised..." She puts emphasis on the word 'apologised'. "Maybe she would forgive you. If you explained yourself, you know?"

I want to tell her that it's not like that. There's so much building in me that I just want to yell and scream at her, kick and punch at the walls until there are bruises all over my hands and the walls are dust and debris and nothing.

Until everything is nothing. Until there's nothing in the world that's wrong - like I felt during the perfect middle, when Maxine would smile and laugh with me, when Eden would tease me about the competition. Before everything crashed down.

"No. I don't know, okay? Stop trying to make it all better." The second I say it, I regret it, but like always I keep going - because there's no restraint in me. "Because you can't make it any better."

Without any more words, because all that's left are tears and the swelling in my throat, I spin around and go to my room, the bucket of ice cream and spoon forgotten. I hear footsteps outside my door and scrunch my hands up in the fabric of my blanket.

The footsteps go away, and I exhale.

↠↞

There's a knock at my door. I frown and look up from my pepperoni double cheese pizza, with extra cheese because I love cheese and I deserve it. Aunt Xena's not home, so the responsibility of walking a few feet to the door and opening it lands on me.

I let the slice of pizza hang from my mouth as I shuffle toward the door, unlocking it and peeking out to see who's there. When I do, my mouth drops open, and I barely manage to catch my pizza. No way. No way! He can't be here!