Episode 44

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Cygny

First day of school. Bagong school. Bagong experience. At bagong environment. Isa na akong ganap na Senior High School student. I am a few steps away from my dreams. I am grasping it so tight in a way that it will not slip away from my hands.

Ngayon ay nandito ako sa aming classroom. Ako ang kauna-unahang student na pumasok. I had this planned ahead, gusto kong laging pumasok nang maaga. Ewan ko ba, nakasanayan ko na lang kasi talaga 'yon ever since I became a CSG President of my previous school.

It's six thirty o'clock in the morning. Bakit wala pa rin ang mga classmates ko? And more importantly, bakit wala pa rin si Razel? Loka talagang babaeng 'yon, lagi na lang late.

Yes, Mag-kaklase uli kami. Bestfriend ko na si Razel since I can remember. Nakakaumay man na kaklase ko siya simula Elementary, hindi ko maitatangging hindi magiging kumpleto ang buhay ko kung wala ang loka-lokang iyon. Kahit na mas bakla pa siya sa mga bakla, mahal na mahal ko 'yon.

Napatigil ako sa pag-iisip nang marinig kong bumukas ang pinto. Agad akong humarap sa pumasok. I smile my one million worth smile but I forced myself to not let the corners of my lips to turn down when I saw who she is.

It's Calizta.

"Good morning." Came by my small voice. Lumabas na lang kaya ako? Ang awkward kasi.

"Cygny? Classmates pala tayo!" She said cheerfully and jog her way towards my seat. "Can I sit with you?"

No, please no. Napapalunok, tumango ako. Jusko, dumating ka na, Razel. Masasapak talaga kita.

Nang makaupo na si Calizta sa aking tabi ay kinain kami ng nakakabinging katahimikan. Walang nagsasalita sa amin. Walang gumagawa ng kahit na anong galaw o tunog.

Dahil ayoko naman ng ganito, nagpasya na lang ako na magtanong sa kanya.

But, the moment I said "May I ask something?" She said, "Puwedeng magtanong?"

Napakamot ako sa aking batok. "You first." We both chorus and laugh.

"Ikaw muna." I laugh more. "Ano ba ang tanong mo?"

"About kay Hue, sana."

Oh. I blink.

"Okay lang ba?"

At first, I want to just storm out of this room and leave her alone. This is the last topic that I want to talk about her. It's seriously borderline awkward for us to talk about my boyfriend, given the fact that they both shared a history, a depressing history.

But, I managed to nod.

"Kayo pa rin ba?" She asked. Again, this is the last question I want to be asked.

Bumuntong hininga ako at saka pinilit na ngumiti. "Yes, nasa California na siya ngayon pero we never cut our connections. Lagi kaming magka-facetime every night." I forced myself not to look sarcastic or arrogant.

She held my hand and stare right into my eyes with the same concerned eyes that she gave me the last time I saw her. "I'm happy for you." She sighed. "But, be careful, huh? I am still in doubt with him."

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