33. Another Place, Another Time

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We're at a cafe, drinking coffee. Me and Jaemin and the girl he's going to marry. How crazy is that?

Luna texted me this morning and insisted that I joined them. She seems to have set her heart on making me her new best friend, in addition to being her maid-of-honour. I told them I'd meet them at the cafe, but late, that I'm helping my mum with grocery shopping. It's hard, but I can't think of any good reason to wriggle out of the invitation. And I want to see him again. Yeah, I know. I'm a sucker for torture. 

It's the last day of my holidays. Tomorrow, it's back to school. Tomorrow, he and Luna are going back to campus. I won't be seeing them until spring. Until the wedding.

So here I am, sitting across them at a table near the window. It's pretty cramped, and all the tables are taken, but we managed to squeeze into this bench, which is way too small for three people. Jaemin is sitting in the middle between the two of us; it's ironic, in a way, but apt, he's sitting with the two most important people in his life, the girl he loves, and the girl he's marrying. Seriously, how much more twisted can it get?

Jaemin and I are sitting close, almost thigh to thigh, and close up I can clearly see the toll recent months have had on him. Those dark circles, the high set of his shoulders as if he's always got his teeth clenched. He looks in need of a hot bath, chicken soup and my bed for a week. Hah. I'm so miserable I'm even beginning to see humour in my misery. That's good, right, Kim Mina? Laughter is the best cure for a broken heart. Looking up wise quotes for heartbreak is a new hobby of mine. The net is swamped with billions of them. I guess billions of people get their hearts broken every second. That's comforting in an odd way. It helps to know I'm not the only one who's crying.

Luna gets a call midway, and says, "I have to go, my mum wants me to accompany her for lunch at her women's knitting club. Sorry, guys."

"Knitting?" I say.

"Yeah," she grins. "They practically raised me, my mum and her knitting gang. They've been knitting for like the past twenty years. She used to bring me to all their meetings. You won't believe how many knitted sweaters and scarves I've got."

"Oh," I stare at her. "So, um, do you knit?"

"Yes, I do. It's a great hobby. It keeps me focussed." She points down to her yellow sweater. It has a goldfish in the middle. "I knitted this. Isn't it cool?"

Wow. Okay. No wonder she doesn't have friends. Soon, she'll be knitting goldfish sweaters for Jaemin. I imagine his face when she makes him wear it. I giggle. I must be getting better. That's the second time in ten minutes that I've wanted to laugh. She kisses me Jaemin on the lips, a quick brush, and I don't feel like laughing anymore.

"Bye," she says, "I'll see you later", and rushes off with her goldfish.

I stay silent for a while, looking into my americano.

Around us, the cafe is bustling with office workers grabbing takeaway lunches and mothers bouncing babies, and we sit amongst them, drinking in each other's presence. We sit there, huddled together, watching as the first flakes of snow drift down from the cloudless sky. Just two people, about to part ways, about to let each other go.

"Do you remember the first time you spoke to me at the locker?" I hear my voice say slowly, coming from far away, almost as if it is not my voice, but someone else's altogether.

"Yes." His smile is slow, crooked. "Of course I do. Right from the first time I saw you."

I draw in a sharp breath, trying to keep my thoughts inside my head, but they seep out, like water through my fingers. "The first time you saw me?"

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