Eat a Fuckin' Crayon

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Gerard's pov, lunch time

I sat down with the boys at our usual table as they talked about the new Lego Batman game.

"Gerard, have you played it yet?" Ray asked.

"No, I haven't had the chance," I lied, I had actually beaten the game over the weekend, but I had other things I wanted to discuss, "Guys, have you seen the new girl?" They all nodded with various forms of 'yes'.

"She's in my first period. The weird thing is, she's not scared of me. I'm still the scariest guy here, aren't I?"

"Yeah, but why do you care what she thinks?" Frank asked.

"I don't know, it's weird. I think I might like her, but I don't know..." I trailed, "How do I get a girl to like me back?"

"Do what you usually do, impress her." Ray said.

"She isn't impressed by me. Besides, I think I really fuckin' like her. I don't just want to get into her pants." I explained.

"Yeah, cause you've gotten into a girls pants!" Frank laughed.

"Shut up! It's not like you have either!" I pushed him, "Anyways, how the hell do I get her to like me?" They thought for a moment, then Ray began.

"Eat a fuckin' crayon." He stated.

"What!?" He leaned in closer with a serious look on his face.

"Eat. A. Fuckin'. Crayon."

"How the hell do you eat a crayon!?" That was when, he reached into his blazer pocket, and pulled out a small crayon box. He flipped open the box and slid out a crayon as if it were a cigarette.

He held the little orange stick between his fingers, bringing it to his mouth as the three of us stared in horror. He stuck his tongue out, licking the thing as he stared back at us in total seriousness. He suddenly bit the thing, I sat there in shock as he chewed and swallowed.

"That was the coolest thing I have ever fuckin' seen, how does it taste?" I asked.

"Like plastic and wax with a hint of paper." He explained. Woah, I should totally try that...

"Okay, Frank, you got any ideas?" I turned to my short friend as he thought for a minute.

"You said she isn't scared of you, right?" I nodded, "Well there you go! Give her something to be afraid of, freak her out! We could help you out."

"That sounds good too! Mikey, you got anything?"

"Just be honest, tell her how you feel. It's easy and doesn't involve shoving school supplies down your throat." He plainly stated.

"Yeah, but that's boring! She'll be expecting that!" I turned towards my curly haired friend, "Ray, do you have a crayon I can use?"

"Hell yeah," He pulled out a dark purple crayon and handed it to me. I examined it, and played with it for a minute. I can do this...

I stood up and looked around the cafeteria until I spotted miss angel face sitting alone.

"I'll be back in a bit." I said, walking away and towards her.

"Hey angel face, I have something to show you." She looked up at me, unsure of what was to come next.

"Okay punk boy, whatta ya got?" I glanced back towards the guys who were watching and waiting for what was to come. I turned back towards her, pulling out the little purple stick, "A crayon? Try again."

"No! It's what I'm going to do with it, watch!" I did exactly what I saw Ray do. I slowly brought it to my mouth, I stuck out my tongue, taking a fat lick of the crayon. This thing tastes disgusting! Well, down the hatch I guess...

She watched with curious eyes as I opened my mouth, chomping my teeth down half way through the purple thing. This thing is awful! Why does Ray do this!?

"What the fuck?" She had a look of horror on her face. Shit! Did I do it wrong? I must've done it wrong...

"I... it was cooler when Ray did it..." Why am I so shy all of the sudden?

"No no," She laughed, "That was, very weird. What did it taste like?" She wondered.

"Uhm uh, like plastic and wax with a hint of paper," I spoke fast, "I'm gonna go now," I awkwardly walked back over and sat down, "She hated it."

"That's tough, now it's time for my turn! Come on boys, let's do what we do best and look fuckin' badass to scare the living shit outta her." Frank said, beginning to get up.

"Hell yeah!" I cheered, making our way back over to her.

"Back so soon? What are you gonna do this time?" I opened my mouth to speak, but she kept going, "Wait wait wait, lemme guess. You're gonna shove a colored pencil up your nose? Or eat some paper?" She giggled.

"No!" I started, "I'm going to get to you one day," I made sure I looked as terrifying as possible. I leaned in close and nearly growled, "I'm going to scare you so bad you won't be able to move for a week and on that day, I'm going to laugh loud in your face. Don't fucking test me, you have no idea who you're messing with." I snarled.

Her jaw dropped as her eyes went wide. Then it went back to its normal state as she calmly rested her head in her hands and in a soft tone whispered.

"Bet," She smirked, "I'm sorry, it's so hard to take you seriously, considering that you just ate a crayon. Regardless of that, I'd like to see you try." She got up, grabbed her bag, and walked off just as the bell rang. Leaving us totally shocked. Woah...

OwO-
Ahahahahahahaha crayons, thanks Dizzy_Star_77 for the idea! This was so fun to write, I couldn't stop laughing omg. I have so many more shenanigans the boys are gonna get into its gonna be so much fun! Yay! Have a colorful day~peace out cheesebags

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