𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐓𝐨 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐇𝐢𝐦-Discontinued

15

How?

I keep repeating in my mind.

How is someone so beautiful and precious also so dangerous and can be considered a monster?

I cannot seem to find an answer to the question.

Can I? Will I?

I also keep repeating in my mind.

Can I reject him?

I know the answer to the question and it is a no. I can't reject him.

Which answers my other question which is yes. I will be able to love him.

But right now, I think I need to keep my distance. I need to make sure I know what I want. I never wanted something so badly until I met him. I want his love and affection. He is like a virus and I have caught him.

I know a stupid saying.

I am a lovesick puppy on drugs wanting to touch, feel, and be loved by him. But just remembering what he used to live like makes me shutter.

How can I be with someone like that? What would my mom do in this situation? In times like these I wish she was still alive to help me understand and cope with stuff.

I tell myself to keep my distance, but it is like I am killing myself inside being away from him.

I want him to mark me and runaway with him and never worry about a thing ever again. But I know that won't work. I love the pack and leaving would kill my father. Maximus will chase me to the end of the Earth dragging Mateo with him and then Tiana will be here.

So, I have to stay. And I have to know am I willing to love him?

...

It has been a month and a half since that conversation went down at the river. Instead of moping away in my bedroom I now just ignore everyone. When I smell the vanilla and spice scent at school I walk the other way. I want to make sure that I know what I am doing is right for me.

"How was school April?" my father asks at dinner with the whole pack there.

"It was great," I give him a fake smile and continue scarfing my food down like a maniac. When I am done I dismiss myself from the table and put my plate in the dishwasher and make my way upstairs.

I close the door and grab a bag filling it with what I need. I put a blanket, a pillow, several packs of cookies, some water, and finally lingerie that is pink and lacey. I sigh as I zip the bag up and slide it under the bed. I put on my sleepers to get some sleep when Mateo comes in.

"Hey," I greet him as I flip the bed covers over.

"Hi April," he sits on the bedside and I look at him curiously.

"So, what's up?"

"You know we love you?" I nod at his question. "And you know we want what's best for you?"

"Yes, Mateo get out!" I whine. "I don't want any lectures right now. Please I have a big test tomorrow," I put a pillow over my face and  he chuckles.

"Okay okay, just checking sis," he smiles. He gives me a kiss on the forehead and then leaves.

"Goodnight!" I yell as he closes the door. I sigh as I try to relax and fall asleep easily thinking about the night ahead.

...

The river can be heard as I rush over. I switch back before I make it to the opening and put my lingerie on. I put a light blue dress over it and continue walking in human form.

Daniel meets me at the opening glaring at me. I smile even though he narrows his eyes at me. I open my arms to give him a hug and he lets me,  but doesn't return the hug.

"I missed you so much," I whisper in his chest. Daniel pulls away and looks at me strangely.

"Go ahead and get on with it," he says harshly and this time it hurts to hear him use that tone with me.

"Get on with what?"

"Rejecting me," he runs his hand across his face and for a moment he looks older.

"I am not going to reject you," I tell him softly.

"So you're going to make me wait another month and a half in pain again?" his shot blows and I feel guilty for my disappearance.

"Daniel I-I had to stay away so I knew what I wanted. After you told me everything I had to clear my head and make sure that I was willing to give up everything for you," I explain to him. He stares at me with a blank expression.

"So what was your decision?" he questions while stepping closer. I look up into his eyes and wrap his arms around me.

"I love you and all I want is you," I whisper and our lips crash into one another. Every emotion comes out in the kiss and I moan loving what the outcome was of my decision.

"I love you," he whispers in my ear.

"Mark me" is all I can say and he smiles.

"Of course my love."

...❀❁❀...

So...if you are dirty minded and you know it clap your hands!!

*clap clap*

Next chapter is you know...some sexual activity...but if you are not into that then just skip to the next chapter. I'll make sure to remind you and I will update two chapters. So don't come to me saying I ruined your innocent mind.

You joined Wattpad for crying out loud!!

Thanks ya'll!!

-Trisgraceeverdeen