Love and Other Diseases (bxb)

Chapter Sixteen

We weren't the only ones in the escape room, which kind of ruined the low-key fantasies I had of making out with Blake against a puzzle-covered table.

"This is stupid," Blake declared.

I rolled my eyes. "It's not stupid. We need to find out if we can solve problems together. Maybe we should ask the family that's going in with us to not contribute."

"Can I say something?" Blake whined. "I have an opinion on your whole problem solving thing. I kind of feel like the ability to work together as a couple and solve problems is something that two people figure out over time in their relationship, as they—"

"Excuse me?" I asked the dad of the family. "Do you and your children mind not contributing to the escape room?"

Blake turned around and hit his head against the wall dramatically. "Holy shit."

The older guy wrinkled his nose. "Why? That would be a waste of money, don't you think?"

That was a fair point. "In the spirit of romance?" I attempted. "This is my potential boyfriend, Blake. Sorry he has his head against the wall, he's embarrassed by me right now. We're doing this escape room to see if we should become a couple."

The mother looked at Blake with something similar to pity in her eyes. "That seems like a...nontraditional way of going about things."

"What, a boy having a boyfriend?" I asked, prepared for it.

"...No, honey. Why is the escape room deciding if you'll be good for each other?" she asked, pulling her toddler son closer to her legs. Why even bring a toddler to an escape room?

"I'm happy to explain."

"No, he isn't going to explain," Blake interrupted, pulling me away a little. "I'm so sorry. You can totally contribute. He's just a weirdo."

The family moved farther away from us. "Blake, what the heck?"

"Why are you so weird?" he groaned. "You're such an oddball. Dude, they paid. We're just gonna do the escape room and beat it and then you'll be my boyfriend, right?"

Wait, were those the standards? I didn't realize that this was the final determining factor.

"Noooo," I corrected. "This will help me find out if we should date."

Blake pouted and shoved his head into my arm. "Why won't you date me, dude? Kiss me." I kissed him. "See? We're already at kissing level!"

"Kissing is one thing," I said. "Emotional vulnerability is another."

He stared at me blankly before groaning. "You're such a typical man."

Now that was offensive.

"Excuse me?!"

"You know," Blake said, shrugging. "Afraid of crying, speaking in anything other than monotone, and emotional vulnerability."

The mom of the family seemed to be nodding along.

"Aren't you insulting yourself?!" I sputtered.

"Nope," Blake chirped. "I'd be emotionally vulnerable with you. Actually, I already have been."

Huh. He was turning this into a competition.

That changed things.

"Alright, everybody!" an employee cut in before I could respond. "For the next 60 minutes, you'll be working together with the folks around you to...escape."

He said it in a dramatic tone, like it wasn't exactly what we were all expecting.

"I'm your game guide, Erwin. I'm going to take you inside our escape room, where we will watch a video that explains your mission. Everyone follow me."