kiss me | billie eilish

15 - bad memories

this chapter is dedicated to a good human aka jules - a man decided to delete wattpad so i thought i would write about her here ily jules also i decided to try out lowercase in my writing hehe

~billie's pov~

"i can prove that i still love you." lylah says, her eyes glistening with what seems like forgiveness.

she was so beautiful, inside and out. i went and fucked someone while she told me she loved me and missed me, and now she still acts like this towards me? why? angel.

lylah lifts up her phone so i can see what she is doing, she unblocks me and a smile is glued to her face.

"you're crazy" i laugh, pulling out my phone so that she can now see, and i block brandon.

i completely forgot she never found out who i cheated on her with, her reaction when she saw his name left me stunned.

"br-brandon?" she stutters, "que?" she asks with confusion laced in her voice. "i forgot to tell you it who it was i'm so sorry-" i try to tell her but before i can finish she's ran out of the room and straight to the bathroom across the hall.

her muffled sobs are still audible and i really don't know if i should go knock and ask if she's okay or let her cry it out.

i better ask.

"lylah," i start, "are you okay?" no answer. "baby talk to me." baby. i can't help but love calling her that.

"billie, i j-just," she says with a raspy voice, "now is not the time to talk. i realise i should give her space and so i message her 'i decided to give you some space, i'm at home message me when you're feeling up to it' before leaving.

~lylah's pov~

the memories from hell. they just keep flashing back.

"brandon!" i scream, trying to escape his grip. "get the fuck off of me!"

brandon's smile would grow, before he begins to punch me in the face over and over before dragging me to his bedroom.

"don't tell me what to do princess." he'd smirk.

~

"i'm not your toy." i try to stand up for myself, but nothing seems to work anymore. he follows me onto the school bus, his hand around his neck as he does so.

"oh but you are."

his other hand reaches up my shirt, groups of gasps echo through the bus. "i love you lylah, now say it back."

"i l-love you brandon-" i force out of my own mouth.

"i know you do."

~

my mind races back to the present, my head spinning as i stand up from the bathroom floor. "billie-" i cry out, looking for someone to hold on to, anxiety rising like a bubble in my throat.

"billie!" i scream, falling back to the ground, darkness pulling me in, my chest rising and falling quicker than humanly healthy.

"i-i'm not your.. toy" i speak, brandon's face stuck in my mind. my stomach churns as i force myself back up, struggling to walk to my bed, falling down onto it.

almost instantly falling asleep, i find myself dreaming of the worst, brandon finding billie. and doing the same to her.

~billie's pov~

i've seen lylah have panic attacks, and i know what to look for when she's about to have one.

the look she had in her eyes. she looked so scared, so hurt. does she know who brandon is?

i pick up my phone and realise lylah still hasn't even seen my message. is she okay? on the spot i decide i should go back to her apartment.

~

running through the unlocked door, i go straight to her room, to my surprise i find a sleeping lylah. she doesn't look peaceful though. it looks like she's having a nightmare.

"lylah." i shake her awake, tears instantly falling from her eyes as she falls into my arms. was she this upset?

"brandon is a fucking messed up person billie.." she cries into my shoulder.

"what happened, what did he do to you?" i ask shakily. she sits herself up, wipes away her tears and tells me.

"at first he was sweet, asked how i was." she started. "it quickly turned toxic, he'd hit me, punch me, force me to love him, for gods sake billie, he'd fucking rape me." lylah told me while holding a stern face.

"and i can't let him do that to you." she broke down again, falling back into my arms. "hey, hey." i try to calm her down.

"why would i leave you for him anyways?"

A/N

short filler chapter hehe - did you enjoy?

tell me if you would rather lowercase or proper grammar and shit :'))

stay hydrated x

(725 words)