Schatzi

26

"...and it means I won't see you during the day, and Friedrich won't have any kind of influence on how you're treated," Jens continued, lying on the bed next to Peter, looking up at the ceiling as he spoke quietly. "But it'll be better. You'll be safer."

"I don't know," Peter whispered with a sigh, sitting up as much as he could in the tight space, only able to lean on his elbow and look down at Jens who's gaze flicked over to him. "Aren't there more guards and officers and stuff there? Won't that just cause more trouble."

"Are you seriously trying to turn this down? A clerical job means you get to sit down while you work all day, no hard labour, nothing deadly unless you get picked on by a guard, but that happens all the time out in the yard as well. You'll be so much safer there. Please, Peter. It'd make me feel better if I knew you were in that kind of position. Aren't you tired? Don't you want thi-"

Peter shook his head and cut him off.
"Of course I'm fucking tired. I'm exhausted. But I know what I'm doing here. If they took me to do admin stuff, I'd have no clue what I was doing, that would draw attention and we all know drawing attention usually means dying. So no. Someone else can take it."

Jens stared at him a moment longer, raising an eyebrow in a questioning look. He didn't say anything, just sighed loudly and sat up, shrugging and ignoring Peter. He turned over on his side to try and get comfy, failing at that but effectively blocking Peter out.

"Hey," Peter sighed, tapping him on the shoulder, frowning when he ignored him. "Hey!"

"Jesus, Peter," Jens snapped, looking back over his shoulder at him, glaring darkly. "You've made it perfectly clear you don't want my help. I get it, stop rubbing it in."

Peter paused, taken aback. Jens wasn't an angry person in the slightest.
"I...I wasn't going to say that. I was going to ask if you were alright? Why aren't you sleeping in the kapo's room? Surely that's nicer than in here, having to share a single bed with me."

"Obviously," Jens said, rolling back over to face Peter again, a smirk on his lips. "You fucking stink. I'd literally rather be anywhere else than here."

Peter kicked him playfully under the paper thin blanket there were sharing, barely more than a rag, and grinned back.
"Ditto."

They lapsed back into an awkward silence and Peter realised Jens had dodged his question.
"...so what's going on?" He asked eventually, real concern in his voice. "Is it him? Is he doing something?"

"What? Friedrich? No, no, he's fine, it's all good," he said quickly. Too quickly. He took a deep breath and added, "he's just...I don't know how to describe it. I don't know, he's a bit overwhelming at times. I don't always want to do what he wants to do but I go along with it anyway. It's better to just go along with it, you know?"

"Why don't you just tell him you don't want to?" Peter asked. "He's like your boyfriend, right?"

Jens laughed at that, a dry, humourless bark. "Wow, you're stupid. Friedrich is like a boyfriend to me, but the job I'm fulfilling by being in his room every night is not like that at all. He's had others before me, I know that, and that's all they were there for. It's not a choice. But he loves me, and I love him, and I want to make him happy. If I told him 'no', he wouldn't be happy and I don't think he'd treat me like a boyfriend in that situation."

Peter furrowed his brow, extremely confused. "So...you're his boyfriend but also..." he trailed off again, not sure what to say, how to phrase it.

"Also his whore," Jens finished for him, attempting to make his voice sound light and jokey but it didn't work. "Depending on the situation. And I'm fairly sure he'd treat me as such if needs be. So basically I'm avoiding him tonight because I'm not in the mood. I'll be back with him tomorrow."