Serendipity

The ignored heart

𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘐 𝘥𝘰 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱?
𝘐 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥'𝘷𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦
𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘪𝘴 𝘮𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘺𝘢𝘭,
𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘷𝘢𝘪𝘯.

If you thought I was the only person that got their heartbroken, you were wrong. I think you guys can remember Samuel, the friend I made in December. I told you how we met and how I used him for my own benefit. I wanted to explain his side of the story and how he felt during this time because he deserves to be valid in my story as well. Especially when he deserves a better friend than me.

During the month of December, Samuel and I texted each other a bunch except he was always the first one to text me. He always talked about his life and how school was going. Things always got interesting when we're talking about relationships. He asked me about my past crushes that I've had and I explained my situation with Bradley. Since he didn't know much information at the time he was on my side of the argument. I knew way before that he would change directions. I remember him talking about one of his crushes and how he wanted to confess to her. We are going to call her Galia. Samuel kind of expressed his feelings about Galia and I always thought it was kind of sweet it at the time. Until he asked me a favor, he asked me if I could write a letter in his words so I can give it back to him for him to deliver it to Galia. I agreed because I just wanted to be a nice friend since I was already getting information out of him anyway. So I did and he did technically give it to her but I don't know what her response was. What I do know is that his feelings diminished after that. During the months of January through February he asked me about Jiro specifically and what was he like. I, of course, gave my answer but later on, I would know the truth of why he asked.

It was the end of February and this was after my birthday. Samuel gave me a gift, very small one by the way but I didn't think much of it. Once Samuel found out about the news that I was in a relationship something changed. He sounded more jealous and less interested in me that he didn't call me all the time like he used to. When he didn't contact me, he contacted Amelia and that's when I found out the truth. Samuel was jealous of me and Jaden's relationship. Later on, he would surprise me with a confession of how he felt towards me. He told me that he understood where my place was but he just explained that before I got into a relationship, and I was still crushing on Jaden, that his feelings grew for me. I told him my honest answer that I didn't have any feelings for him and that I only saw him as a friend. I told him we could still be friends. He agreed. What I knew in my mind was I just used this kid and I am so confident that in the future,  he will be happy that I said no.

I think if I can recall, he wrote a song about me since he knew that I was a songwriter and that Amelia helped out too. At that point, I was only wondering "what have I done?" I felt terrible about how I treated him as a person because I can only imagine how it would feel being used and then having to deal with rejection. I think I put him through a downward spiral into depression. I know it's normal but you have to understand and have at least some sympathy.

He later hated me because of a few things. Starting them off is with the song he wrote. He placed his trust in Amelia by keeping this a secret. Unfortunately, I just had to tell Bradley because I guess it was tea and I placed my trust in him. If you didn't guess, I didn't have to tell Bradley. I was being sarcastic. It was my fault, not even a surprise at this point. Bradley then proceeds to tell Samuel about it. Samuel then gets absolutely furious at Kali aka me for not being able to keep a secret. Except there was one thing he forgot to mention, Samuel never told Amelia that this was a secret and it's on record. How was she supposed to know? I know that sounds stupid but it was my only excuse.

Next, was a trust issue that never got resolved. After the whole song incident, there was a misunderstanding. Samuel thought I, myself told Bradley about the song which I didn't but when I went over to his house for a study session, he mentioned it first not me. That's when I continued the conversation about it since he already knew. Either way, technically I should and I shouldn't be accused of not being able to keep a secret. I was pretending to be two different people so it gets kind of confusing. The real truth is that Samuel told Amelia and then Amelia told Bradley. I found out through Bradley when I went to his house. Amelia should be at fault and not me. But speaking from me I should be at fault because I did tell Bradley. Samuel did get mad at Amelia afterward but that never ended up working out and he later blocked her. It wouldn't be long until he blocked me.

As of today, he is allegedly still mad at me and is now accusing me of not having a relationship and other lies that are somewhat true and not true. Don't get me wrong, he does have some valid reasons to be mad at me but some of them are absolutely stupid, without proof, and just plain assumptions. Ultimately, I do feel bad for Samuel and what I did to him. That is the reason why I don't have really anything against him. I think that's how it feels to be ignored.