Clayton's Girl

Chapter Six

||Aubree||

"Are you hungry?" I'm always hungry. I shrug, looking at the sidewalk pass beneath me.

"Let's grab something eat. I didn't eat my lunch." Clayton smiled and my stomach twisted into a knot.

"I don't have any money, but thanks for inviting me along." I slowed my pace and started to turn the other way.

"Woah woah woah, hold up." I looked back at Clayton who had gently placed his hand on my arm. His large hands could easily wrap around my bicep if he wanted them to. "Don't you know a gentleman always pays?" He raised his eyebrow at me.

"Maybe in fairy tales." My life is far from that.

"Well then today you get to pretend you're in one." He grinned and I felt awkward. I did nothing to deserve his kindness.

I didn't deserve that bag. I don't deserve his attention or for him to defend me. I do not deserve this.

-

A colorful sign flashed over my head as we stepped through the door of a little restaurant.

"Two please." I watched him as he spoke so confidently to the hostess and she responded with instant delight. His demeanor never waivers. He always seems so sure of himself. I almost felt jealous of his charismatic nature. What is it like to be so naturally liked?

Sitting at the table, I folded my hands in my lap.

"Here." He handed me a menu and encouraged me to look through it. I felt uncomfortable taking handouts. If my mother were here, she would be reminding me to at least have pride, even if it was fake. That way the world will never know my inner struggles. Be brave, stand straight up when you walk, she'd say. Cover yourself up. Don't let them figure you out. Looking back, I now know that it was her way of keeping herself out of trouble. If I could cover up our secrets, nobody would come for me. Nobody could take me away from her.

If I were gone, she would be alone with him. Because she couldn't find the courage to leave him, not even if it were for me.

But she had no problem leaving me behind with him.

If she couldn't be alone with him, what made her think I could?

"Do you know what you want?" I was pulled out of my thoughts.

"Order for me." This way I at least didn't need to feel guilty about how much he'd spend.

"Sure."

I listened as he ordered two burgers and then I waited for the waiter to walk away. "What brought you to Richmond? There's nothing here." I inquired. Richmond was is a small town. You'd be lucky if you even found a map where it's labeled.

He shrugged and I continued. "Clayton, people don't move here. They leave here."

"Tell me something about you, and I'll tell you something about me." He bargained but I didn't have much to tell. He took in my silence and continued to speak. "Okay. I'll ask a question. Without your mom, who takes care of you?" The question felt too intrusive, but I realized that for a normal person, that question wouldn't be intrusive at all.

"My stepdad, Mike."

"What about your actual dad?" A lump grew in my throat.

"I answered your first question, now you answer mine." I stated firmly.

"I hurt someone."

My eyes widened. He didn't seem like someone who is capable of hurting people. He seemed so confident when he said it, like he didn't regret what he did.

"My dad passed away when I was little."

"Do you miss him?" He was eager to ask, and I cleared my throat to remind him it was my turn. "Right. What's your next question?"

"Why did you hurt someone?" I held my breath, waiting for his answer.

"They hurt someone close to me." I let out my breath, and my anxiety washed away as I realized he's sort of just an anti-hero.

"That seems justified." I replied.

"I thought it was, but the school... Not so much. They expelled me and now I'm repeating my senior year."

"That seems unfair." I frowned.

"Well, whoever has the better lawyers is all that matters these days." He shrugged it off, but I could sense anger behind his words. Whatever he's gone through, he is far from over it.

"I don't remember my dad too well, but I know he was a good person, and I miss having that in my life."

"You don't have good people?" He asked and I realized I had said more than I wanted to. I guess that's of flaw of not having anyone to talk to for so long.

I wasn't protecting Mike. I just didn't want to be pitied.

I took a deep breath. "No, not anymore."

"Well I wouldn't say not anymore. You have me now." He smiled and I tried to plaster on an appreciative face, but the fact of the matter is that it seems good people don't last long in my life. "We can be friends, can't we?" He asked.

What would the outcome of that even be? I didn't want to start to care about someone just for them to get bored of me when they realize I'm just this pathetic girl.

"Can't we?" He pressed.

"I mean, I guess." I swallow, trying to push down my nerves.

-

Clayton and I stood on the side of the road. The sky was beginning to dark and you could see the first few stars of the evening peeking out from behind the heavy clouds.

Clayton was watching me, and I wasn't sure what he expected of me. "What?"

"Let me walk you home." He didn't smile when he said this. He didn't make much of an expression at all. His eyes just screamed that he was trying to figure me out. The way Clayton spoke made me feel like I wasn't allowed to say no.

I tucked my hair behind my ear and looked up at him. "I don't- "

"What is that?" He squinted his eyes and leaned down towards me.

My body flushed as I realized I had forgotten what I had been working hard to conceal all day. I had just met him, but I quickly learned that Clayton had a way of making things slip your mind.

I took a step back and Clayton stepped forward. His hand reached for the tall collar of my shirt and I quickly pushed his arm away. I didn't say anything. I just blinked at him. What could I say?

He stood tall and gave a few shallow nods as if he was thinking to himself. "Let me walk you home." He said again.

"Okay." My voice was barely a whisper.

-

The door to my house slowly creaked open. From the outside, I could tell no lights had been turned on and I wondered if I was still safe.

When I had finally returned home last night, Mike wasn't here. Nor was he home when I woke up for school.

I had no guesses of his whereabouts or when he'd be back, but I prayed it wouldn't be for a very long time.

I didn't let Clayton come up to the house. If you got too close you could smell the stench of cigarette smoke seeping out of every crack it could find, and he was already catching onto too much.

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Song: Turning Page by Sleeping At Last