Clouis One-shots

My Sunshine

WARNING: sadness, flashbacks, and inevitable feeling of helplessness
SUMMARY: Clementine isn't the one who gets bit, and has to say goodbye to AJ all alone, singing him away while she has flashbacks of their time together.

Clementine took a deep breath as she looked down at her slashed leg, it was throbing, but as she pulled the sides of her boot away she let out a breath of relief. "Clem..." AJ trailed off suddenly, like he always did when there was trouble in a moment of peace, and a chill settled over her skin. Turning around, she seen her little Goofball's arm was a little bloody, so logically she moved her arm to wipe the blood off and stopped as soon as he tried to pull his arm away when beads of his blood rose to the surface of his skin. It was a bite. Her entire being froze as the thought registered in her mind, he was like a son to her, he was all that she had, and he was going to leave her all alone. Her breath stilled as she realized what would have to happen, and looking up at his face, she seen tears were falling from his eyes.

The walkers at the bottom of the small clif they were on weren't gonna go anywhere, and walkers could come out of the treeline at any time, but she couldn't care less. Slowly, she pulled him into her arms, letting him lay his head in the crook of her neck. He used to do that when he was sad that she had to shoot a bunny for food, because they were so cute, or when it was too cold and he had to keep quiet. Her little Goofball would tuck his head there, and shut his eyes whlie she hummed a song, his favorite thing to do while she drove was to cling to her before he went to sleep. If they ever found a safe place, she'd stop for a moment and hug him to her, because he smelled of the pine trees.

Neither spoke, just sat there with tears in their eyes, his kept hitting her skin, leaving a trail of helplessness in her bones. She was supposed to prevent this, it was supposed to be her bit not him, he hadn't even got to hear the best stories she had of his parents. Of how he had his Dad's compassion for innocent strangers, and his Mother was wary and on guard around everyone at all times. He used to stick his head between her body and arm, he never liked to see the carnage, even as a baby. Alvin Junior was her baby boy, wether she'd given birth to him or not, Louis had even assumed it from the very first moment of seeing them together. "Clem, AJ, I'm here- what happened?" Louis cut himself off as he noticed the situation.

Clem's body shook as she revealed the bite to her boyfriend, it wasn't supposed to be AJ, they had precautions for what to happen next if it were her- they didn't have any for him. Clementine looked up at Louis tears in her eyes, no words leaving her mouth as she encircled AJ with her arms, faintly she remembered him murmuring about her arms being the safest place in the world- that nothing could hurt him when he was in her arms. She wished that that were true.  "Clem... I'm scared..." AJ whimpered from her neck, and she bit her lip as she shook her head at him.

"You don't have to be, Goofball, I'll be right here until you're with your Mom and Dad." She pulled away from him, "and with Lee, and Christa, and Kenny, and so so many more people that I love that you haven't met yet." She wiped his tears away from his eyes. "Do you remember when we were on the road, right after I got you back, you were so scared that when I left, I wouldn't be back. Do you remember what I did?"

"You... you," his face scrunched up as he tried to remember, "you sang me to sleep. When I woke up, you were gone, and I cried but then you came back."

"That's right, Goofball, and I'll always come back for you. No matter what, do... do you want me to sing you to sleep again?" She asked, struggling with the words, not knowing if she could do what needed to be done when he stopped breathing. When he gave her a weak nodd, she began in a shakey voice.

You Are My Sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy
When skies are grey
You’ll never know, dear
How much I love you
Please don’t take my sunshine away

This was the only song that he could fall asleep too, how fitting, Clementine thought as she reminisced to the first time they'd seen each other. His doe-eyes met her amber ones and she felt herself falling into a chocolate waterfall of not being able to tell him no, if it were in her power to get it, it would be his. Looking back, maybe she did spoil him a bit, but he was the only ray of light in her cold, lonely world. In her opinion, he deserved every little bit of sunshine in the entire world, and her love for him was a boundless abbyss that he could never wander in, because he'd get lost.

I’ll always love you
And be there for you
I’ll protect you from harm’s way
‘Cause I adore you
You’re my dream come true
You’re my beautiful sunshine

He was the only one that she had, he'd stayed, AJ was her dream. Her dream was to be protected at all cost, and she failed. Her tears fell endlessly as she wiped his away and tried to soothe herself enough to calm his fears- because they both knew what had to be done in the end. AJ would have to be put down, because she couldn't bare the thought of him walking around aimlessly and snapping at any person. She couldn't bare the thought of living on without him in general! Despite being upset herself, his eyes were closing, and his skin was beyond pale. Touching his forehead brought her to the time he was sick when she was with the New Fontier, he was as firey as a furnace, and as pale as plaster. She thought she'd said goodbye to him then- this time it was until she bit the dust herself.

You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy
When skies are grey
You’ll never know dear
How much I love you
Please don’t take my sunshine away

He was beginning to feel heavy now, his own body refusing to hold him up, and she found herself sobbing as she sat there with him in her arms. "Hey Louis, you're taking too long, and... Holy shit." Aasim trailed off as she guessed he took in the scene before him. Louis relinquished his knife to her, holding it out to her when he noticed her struggle to hold him up in her arms. As if it burnt her Clementine knocked it away, almost over the edge of the cliff.

"I... I can't..." She managed out as she stared at her little boy in her arms. "I raised him, Louis, I remember what he liked to eat most in the world, when he made a face at things.... like killing a rabbit. He... he knew we had to do it to survive, but he wasn't for it, he could never kill something. Louis he could never become a walker, he... he's just too good. And I know- I know you don't belive me 'cause of Marlon, but he didn't mean to do it, he threatened everyone. Everyone AJ liked, and he didn't want to say goodbye, Lou please. Don't give me that knife, because I can't, I won't."

Her face had morphed into a plead and strong refusal, and he gave in, nodding as he did so and retrieved his knife. "I... I understand Clementine... Aasim, grab her." Her eyes were wide as she turned to face the boy she'd come to know as a friend, only for her arms to be secured to her sides.

"No, no, no please, he won't turn, we can bury him at school, he won't come back. Please! Please don't do it!" She cried, and seen as Louis himself let out tears. "Please Lou, please, don't hurt him... please, just leave him with me, I'll carry him back... I can do it." Her desperate whisper was seemingly ignored as her pianist gently pushed a knife into her Goofball's temple, getting blood on his beloved jacket and on her jeans. "No, you monster, I hate you, I hate you..." She cried, as Aasim let her go, and her arms encircled Alvin Junior in a feeble attempt to keep him away from more harm. "Leave me here, I won't go back with you." She denied.

"Aasim, can you go back home and get one of the horses and hook up the remaining cage? I won't leave her here, and we need to bury him." Louis requested as he knew she hadn't meant her hating him one bit. His friend nodded his head before hurrying off to the short walk to the school. Louis sat a little ways away from her, his back facing the cliff so he could watch for on coming walkers from the forest line, they were bound to come as she'd made such a valiant effort to keep him from mercying AJ. He remembered a time with the little dude, Clementine had had a nightmare, and Louis was the only person AJ had gone to. Louis made sure to be walking outside of her door the next night to hear her cries. After he'd gone in, they'd woken Alvin when he told a joke and they both laughed, then he climbed in the middle of them on Clem's bed. It was a snug fit to say the least, but Lou thought it was worth it. Afterall, both Clem and AJ had fallen back asleep quickly, and he followed soon after.

TO BE CONTINUED?