Summer's Spell

Chapter 4 - The Comic

"Ladies and gentlemen, our first comic is a fresh new face here at Tickle's who is sure to tickle your funny bone. Please welcome funny man Sheldon."

Sheldon froze for a moment, unable to move.

The stage manager nudged him and whispered, "Just walk straight out to the big X mark and wait for the light to turn green. Good luck, uh, I mean break a leg."

The applause was lukewarm, the spotlight blinding, as Sheldon entered the stage. Loosen up, why am I so nervous? he thought.

"Hey guys, I'm Sheldon, but my friends call me Don. I'm the envy of all of them 'cause I get to spend my summer working as a convenient store clerk. Yes, that's right, I get paid to stand behind the counter all day. In fact, at the store, they call me 'Stand the Man'."

Silence. Sheldon shifted his weight from side to side as he felt the adrenaline pumping through his body. But the job's not as easy as it looks, folks. Take the customers, for instance. This man comes in, buys $50 worth of merchandise, and then he dumps a big bucket on the counter of the dirtiest, filthiest coins I've ever seen. I mean, so dirty it left a nice layer of dirt on the counter. I asked, 'Why the dirty money?' He said, 'I'm filthy rich and I want to share the wealth.'"

Sheldon peered out into the audience, trying to gauge their reaction to his first punch line. He couldn't make out their faces in the dim lighting, but could hear weak, polite laughter. Not good, he thought, but keep cool and keep going.

"People can ask the silliest questions, 'Do you work here?' No, I play here. I'm just wearing a name tag and standing behind the counter for the fun of it."

"And then there are the lottery players. They come in asking me to sell them the winning ticket. Am I psychic? No, but I'm fast becoming psychotic. Is that close enough?"

"And those women customers. You know, the type of women who think if they iron their long hair, wear cat-like eye make-up, and strut around in tight clothes, they can pass for 17. They'll purchase a pack of cigarettes and say, 'Do you need to see my id?' There's no need, ma'am, we don't offer discounts to senior citizens."

Jeers filled the room, "Booooooo." Sheldon broke out in a sweat, and his mouth was dry. He had to speak louder to be heard over the "booing."

"Hey, nothing against senior citizens. I love you people. If it weren't for you, there would not be reruns of all those old shows, like Brady Bunch, Lost in space, All in--."

Whoops, he went too far. The jeering got louder. A bald man, with muscular tattooed arms, yelled out to him in a loud, deep voice.

"Hey pretty boy, why don't you get lost in space?"

"And why don't you join me on stage. Your funny looks might help me get the laughs I need," Sheldon retorted.

"You're on."

In one last desperate plea, Sheldon shouted, "No, wait please, I paid $10 to participate in this comedy show, my act is not over. I have two minutes left. Just two minutes," he screamed.

The tough man bypassed the steps and climbed on stage coming right at him. The crowd jumped to their feet, clapping and cheering loudly, "Go, go, go, go!"

Sheldon ran through the curtain into the hallway until he ran into a wall with doors locked on both sides. He was trapped! Sheldon tensed up, eyes shut tightly, arms bent, protecting his head.

The man reached for him, paused, then smiled and gave Sheldon a pat on the back.

"No hard feelings, kid. I'm just doin' my job. I have to keep 'em entertained. Give 'em what they want. Ya know what I'm saying?"

"And just an FYI. Here at Tickle's, ya don't offend the women, and ya don't offend the seniors. Ya see what happens. All right?"

"All right. Well, it's time for me to get lost in space."

"Ha ha, kid, you're all right. Not funny, no, not at all, but I like ya anyway. So long"

His first comedy act wasn't as he imagined it would be. In fact, it was a disaster. He didn't expect to be so nervous. After all, it was just an open mic for amateurs. It had always been his dream to break into comedy, but It's just was not as easy as it looks. He just found out the hard way he needed new material and a whole lot of practice. But for now, it was time to return to his gloomy apartment.

He was now settled into his rather mundane routine of work, chores and apartment living. Little did he know, the next day he would meet a beautiful, mysterious woman who could change the course of his life.