Bittersweet Pt. 1

Chapter 11: Lexis Side

It took 3 tries to get through to Youngjae but he finally picked up after that third call, I told him Jungkook left the hospital pretty pissed off after hearing he and Lexi were the last ones who were with me.

"Ok but why does that concern me? You keep forgetting Nari I'm not afraid of him and frankly I'm tired of him always popping up into my life and getting into my business, if it weren't for him we would still be together, let him come, I have things I need to say to him too."

After he spoke those last words he hung up on me before I was able to reply.

I ran into a gas station and snagged some butterfly strips and applied them onto the cut on my forehead and continued my way to Youngjaes house where I hopped he'd be.

When I arrived I quickly realized that I was too late, Jungkook and Youngjae were already face time face screaming at each other.

"Was it you ?! Are you the one who cracked her forehead open ?!", Jungkook was in Youngjaes face and yelling the loudest I've ever seen him yell, yet Youngjae just stood there unfazed at the man before him, "or was it your fucking whore of a girl ?! What ? Breaking her heart wasn't enough you had to break her skull too ?!"

"Listen here Jungkook, you son of a bit-"

Before Youngjae could finish his sentence I ran between the two men and pushed a distance between with my hands, "you guys seriously need to stop fighting my battles for me!"

Youngjae tried to shorten the distance between him and Jungkook and smacked my arm away from his chest, "he's the one coming to my house threatening me and you expect me to do nothing ?!"

"I don't care", I took both my hands and shoved him as hard as I could which cause him to lose his balance and fall.

Jungkook started laughing and from another room Lexi ran out and saw Youngjae on the floor, "what the fuck is your guys problems ! Nari you're nothing but trouble causing ! If you could just leave us alone !"

"For once in your fucking life Lexi, shut the hell up !"

She opened her mouth once more to say something but I cut her off before giving her the chance, "I swear to god Lexi you may be pregnant but your face isn't and I'll slap the color off your skin if you dare say another word to me"

"Yeah that's right !", Jungkook cheered behind me.

"You shut the fuck up too Jungkook I'm just as tired of your ass, now, all of you are going to keep your mouth shut and listen to what I have to say"

All three of them stayed where they were and waited for me to speak, I've never felt more in control than in this very moment, I enjoyed it.

"Okay", I started, "all of you, all three of you, have blamed me for everything bad, saying that it's MY fault for everything going on, it's MY fault you both cheated, it's MY fault a man loved me instead of you, but neither one of you once stopped to see that it was YOU !"

Tears started to form in my eyes and I choked on my words, "Jungkook and Youngjae, you're the cause for THIS ! You both decided to take matters into your own hands about things I wanted to ignore, you're own anger and ignorance got in the way of the truth and logic"

They both put their heads down at the sound of what I said, "I did everything I could to be happy, with both of you, but non of you respect me enough to hear my words, to see ME.... for a moment Youngjae, I thought you did, I thought you were the salvation I yearned for", tears started falling from both of our eyes, "I loved you, but you ran and jumped to conclusions, cheating on me, you and Jungkook made me feel like I was broken and defective, like it was something wrong with me to make both men I've ever loved to cheat and hurt me in unspeakable ways"

Jungkook reaches for my hand and held it in his, "Nari I've changed though I didn't mean-"

"Jungkook stop", I pulled my hand from his and wiped my tears away, "I'm tired of sorrys I'm tired of forgiving and being caught in the same cycle of heartache, NEITHER of you deserve me"

The sadness that was once in me was slowly begging to fade with every word I spoke out loud.

Feeling as though I've said all I've had to say to the guys, I turned my attention to Lexi.

"You, Lexi, you I want to speak to alone"

"Yeah as if, you just threatened to hit me I'm not going anywhere with you alone"

"Fine, I don't care"

And I truly didn't care, the only reason why I wanted to be alone was because I didn't want to be around Jungkook or Youngjae anymore.

"Ok so say what you have to say, I'm listening, let's get this over with"

"Before I speak Lexi, I want you to tell me why"

"Why what ?"

"Why do you hate me? Why do you always come after me and my relationships? And my life? I never did anything to you"

She just put her head down and took a moment before responding

"I don't .... I don't hate you Nari, you've had the life I wanted with Youngjae, growing up... he and I were best friends but we eventually went separate ways and into different lifestyles, I always hopped we'd come back to one another but when I saw you two so happy together I was sure it would never happen, unless I did something about it."

She knelt down next to Youngjae who was still on the floor and held his hands, "you see, I never really had a family, and when my mom died my dad went mad, so I ran away from home"

Wow, I actually feel pretty bad for her, I couldn't imagine loving someone all my life and not having them.

"And two years ago", Youngjae continued the story for her, "I saw her walking with grocery bags going behind a building, I got curious and followed behind her, that's when I saw she was living in a hole in a wall, I confronted her about it and I started to help her get on her feet, during that time we got close again"

Youngjae stood up from the floor and walked over to me, "at the time Nari, I truly just wanted to help and I didn't mean to hurt you the way I did, I made a terrible mistake and I wish I've made better choices, I still love you"

I could hear Jungkook scoff under his breath and he looked away from us both, it was hard for him to hear another guy say he loved me but it was harder for me... because I didn't want Youngjae, or, I didn't want to want him.

I gave Youngjae a small smile and walked past him to Lexi and picked up her hands, "I forgive you"

It caught her off guard and left her speechless, I turned to look at Youngjae and still only gave him a smile before leaving his house.

I took Jungkooks hand and guided him outside with me, "I'll take you home"

"Nari ?"

"Not now Jungkook, I don't want to hear anymore people today, just get in the car and I'll take you home"

"Alright"

We both buckled up and the whole drive we didn't speak, not once.

After dropping Jungkook off at his house, I drove home myself and received the usual love and excitement from my dog.

I pulled out my phone and saw I had 15 missed calls and 20 text messages, all from Youngjae and Jungkook.

I turned my phone off and began to pack a bag, I wrote 3 notes, one of which I left for my parents and two I put in envelopes.

I went back to my car and put my bag in the passenger seat and left.

The stress of everything was too much and I needed to get away, it's time to restart.