☹☻ distance ☻☹ malum

epilouge

"daddy?" arabella, their four year old, asked.

"yes, pumpkin?" calum forced a smile.

"how did you and papa meet?"

"well, it was uncle luke who introduced us and we just kinda hit it off. we wouldn't have you if it weren't for him," calum said and booped her nose.

"do you love papa?"

"so much."

and calum didn't have the heart to tell their four year old daughter that michael was slowly dying.

● ● ●

"daddy?" arabella, their nine year old, asked.

"yes, honey?" calum said wiping his eyes, trying to show that he wasn't crying.

"what's wrong?" she was almost in tears just from seeing her dad like this.

"your papa is sick."

he wasn't sick, he was slowly dying.

● ● ●

"dad?" arabella, their thirteen year old, asked.

"yes, arabella?"

"can we visit papa?"

"not today, he's not well enough. i'm sorry." calum just wanted his regular michael back; but that would would never happen, because michael was slowly dying.

● ● ●

"papa?"

"bella?" michael croaked out, he hadn't seen her in a very long time. she was almost eighteen now.

arabella engulfed her papa in a big hug, and he coughed, because he was slowly dying.

● ● ●

"daddy?" arabella had tears streaming down her face.

"we are gathered here today to commemorate michael gordon clifford."

"yes, arabella?"

"he was truly loved."

"i miss him already, my heart aches, and it feels like nothing is ever going to make me happy again," there were tears streaming from her beautiful, brown eyes.

"now it's time for calum hood, his loving husband, to say his eulogy."

"oh sweety. i have to go make a speech now, but i promise you this, we are going to be okay," calum hugged her and stroked her hair, before making his way to the microphone.

he took a breath to steady himself and started, "as most of you know, michael and i met through luke," luke was there, sitting in the front row. the tears already started to form, so many memories came flooding back through calum's head.

"and sometimes people say that you can't fall in love through just texting and calling, but i did. to me, michael was an escape. an escape from a life i never wanted. he helped me through the hard times and made me feel like something. he made me feel like someone." calum paused and took a deep breath.

"when i finally met michael, about after two years of texting, i knew i loved him." tears were streaming down calum's face by now.

"the way his eyes would crinkle when he smiled or when he laughed, how he threw his head back. or when he cried and my heart broke, because seeing michael sad killed me.

michael was beautiful in every single way imaginable, and i wish i would have told him that more." calum let out a broken sob, before recollecting himself.

"before, when michael was so far away from me, i thought that was distance. then, i thought when me and michael fought, that that was the distance between us.

but, no, this is the distance. where you're so far away, disconnected from a person you won't ever see them again or hear them talk or see the ways their eyes gleam when they ramble about things they love,"calum paused to say his last line.

"now, here i stand, wishing i would have told michael i loved him more. because this distance," he took a long pause, "is forever."

-violet

-

i'm sorry.

thank you everyone.