Kisses after midnight (WICKED #0) | ✓

22

JAY HAD BEEN HOME for an hour and in his room for the same amount of time. His father was home for the first time in five days now and had given him a disdainful look as soon as he had entered the house. Normally he would have felt that sharp feeling in his chest again, but he was too happy right now for anything to be able to change his mood, even his father.

Sahar had forgiven him. She didn't hate him. Mateo had grown closer to him too, to the point their conversations weren't verbal fights anymore. Even Gabriela, who seemed cold, was friendly, explaining each problem patiently and smiling whenever he did answered correctly.

Was this how having friends felt like?

"What are you smiling for?"

His head snapped towards the doorway of his room, where his father was standing, a loathing look in his eyes. It made him flinch involuntarily, his father's cold eyes burning on his skin.

"Why aren't you studying?" his father continued," do you know your brother is at the top of his school? And where are you?" He scoffed. "In some kind of disgusting excuse of a school among people who will amount to nothing."

"What does it matter?" Jay said," why do you even act like you care?"

When his father looked him in the eye, this time Jay only wanted to escape. There was no mistake about the feeling in his gaze, about the absolute hatred burning in those famous russet eyes.

"Katharina died for you," he said," and yet you still dare waste your life. How worthless you are."

It felt like he was slapped right across his face. He couldn't hide the hurt this time, the pain too sharp.

"The only reason I let you stay here," his father continued," is because you look exactly like her. That is the only reason." He turned around then. "You better remember that."

The door clicked shut behind him, but Jay could only keep staring at the place he had been standing. He was detestful, so how could he have thought he'd have a happy life? How -

Before more questions filled his head he got off his bed and snatched his cigarettes off his desk. Someone called him then and he glanced at the phone to check who it was.

"Mateo?" he said as he picked up, the surprise in his voice lighter than it normally would have been.

"Hey Jay," Mateo said," I'm outside your house. Do you want to get a drink?"

Normally he would have frowned, especially at how off Mateo's voice sounded, but right now all he wanted was to get the hell out of this house anyway.

"I'll meet you in five," he said.

It only took him minutes to sneak out of the house again. Though he usually didn't do it whenever his father was home, scared of the repercussions that would follow, right now he couldn't care less. Whatever he would do, it wouldn't hurt as much as what he had done just now.

The streets were abandoned, the cold chill which announced the beginning of winter dancing through the streets. October was nearing it's end and with it took most of the leaves, this Thursday night even colder than usual, as if the world could feel the state of his heart.

Mateo didn't speak the whole way to the city, his hair a tousled mess and his eyes dark and glazed over. He kept his hands in his pockets and his head down, but Jay was glad that they didn't need to speak. No words could leave his lips right now either.

They walked, not bothering with a car or anything else. Jay wondered if Mateo had walked towards his house as well, how many hours he had been on the streets, but yet again he didn't ask. Now wasn't the time for questions.

The principal had been right; only those searching for something they lost wandered these streets at night. The fact they were both the only ones there only increased his loneliness.

It took them an hour to reach the city and he had cleared his head by that time. He had had too many pity parties to continue now, so instead he squared his shoulders and looked at Mateo, ready to break their silence. Out of habit he had been heading towards the tattoo shop, but it was at that moment he bumped against someone.

Jay frowned when he looked up, the guy in front of him a solid wall of muscle. He seemed angry, one eyebrow raised as he grabbed his shoulder.

"What?" he said," you're not going to apologize?"

"Why should I?" Jay said.

The guy looked back at his friend, eyes amused though his lips were forming a thin line.

"You hear that?" he said, glancing at Jay then," didn't your mother teach you manners, kid?"

That was enough to push him over the edge, but before he could even land a blow Mateo already had spun around and kicked him. His foot was hooked around the guy's neck and he put more power behind it, until he was slammed down sideways against the street.

"Wha -" his friend began, but Mateo punched him before he could finish his sentence.

He continued on, punch after punch, not seeming to care at all about anything anymore. Jay looked at him in shock, at his empty eyes and emotionless face, and then he grabbed him by the arms and pulled him back.

"Stop it, Mateo," he said," he's already unconscious."

Mateo tried to break free, but Jay kept holding on. Only when he slammed his head against Jay's did he let go, grabbing his bleeding nose with a hand as he stumbled backwards.

"Mateo," he warned," stop."

"Why?" Mateo said as he placed his bloodied knuckles against his forehead," why should I stop? Why does anything matter?"

The red was vivid against his warm, sunkissed skin and when he stared at his other hand, it was reflected in his eyes as well.

"I'm self-destructing, Jay," he said," so let me self-destruct."

Jay had watched him in silence, this broken boy who was shattering all over at midnight, like his soul was made out of falling stars. He walked over to him, every piece reminding him so much of himself.

And he slapped him in the face.

"Get yourself together," he said," what the hell is this bullshit about self-destructing? We aren't doing that, okay?" He shook his head. "We are not."

Mateo looked perplexed, his hand automatically raised to his now crimson cheek, before he slowly turned his gaze towards Jay. He braced himself for a fight, screams, anything really; but when Mateo started laughing, he could only blink.

"Jesus Christ," he said, looking so sad despite his smile," you couldn't tell that to me in a nicer way?"

"Would you have listened?" Jay said.

"You have a point there," Mateo said, voice quieter.

"Glad you're doing better," Jay said as he grabbed Mateo's arm," now let's get the hell out of here before the police comes."

And so they ran the entire way back, the wind carrying them along and dancing with their laughter, the stars hiding behind the clouds from how bright they looked.

Right then and there, Jay felt like he could take the world on.