Feelings behind life.. [ON HOLD]

chapter 8

Katniss's POV

Then I give up on arrows for now and begin to try knives.

Today I finally have my dinner with people, not alone in my room. Fish boy is always with his traitor. The girl who came with him never stays  far from the other career tributes. When I watch them, I meet  the eyes of the traitor (the traitor of district.4) . What is that?! He blinked me. I am annoyed  by it and avoid the eye contact.

Next day I find myself looking for the Fish boy again. I cannot explain its reason to myself, so I try to forget about it and train. After a while Fish boy and his traitor enters the hall. The girl is with them this time. But I think, something is wrong with them. Because they seem more nervous than usual.

After today he does not take part in several training sessions.  What the hell is happening? And why do I care?

Tonight I cannot sleep no matter how hard I try to. I have got bored and annoyed with all these technology and cameras which notes my every breath.  I want fresh air and to see something natural. With this idea I leave the room for the garden outside of the building. Weather is very windy and cold. But it is so much better than the fake warmness inside the building for me. The wind blows through my hair, I close my eyes and listen to the melody of this wind.  I wish everything could stay like this... Then suddenly a noise ruins my pleasure. It is like two men are arguing..?. The noise gets nearer and I hide behind the big tree, no idea what i could do anything else now. Here they are. Traitor  is pushing Fish boy into the garden trying to shut his month. As they come into(to the point that no one can hear) he sets Fish boy free. And he is furious,  begins to shout as soon as he gets rid of traitors hands.

"it was a great shoot, isn't it?!! Woow how much I am talented!! Right??!-- Fish boy is screaming. I guess he is imitating his traitor- now I can make a BLOOD bath for people!!"

"Calm down! It is the guilt of neither of us. Not yours and not mine! It just us meant to be this way"

"Buy why?! I can't stand to all these stupid careers! They all love this bloody game.-his sea green eyes are burning with anger- But I don't. I am not damned stupid like them! "

"So what? What the hell you want?!"

"What I want?! Isn't that clear?! I am just 17 years old!" - Fish boy's face is getting redder as he gets angrier.

"Yeah, dear, I understand. You are too young to die"

"To die? And what about being a murderer? I want to go back my home and be safe. Before my hands have not been anyone's killers."

"Stop shouting! If anyone hears us, even I can't save you. Instead of shouting at me, go and make them cancel the games if you can, YOU IDIOT! I'll be waiting!"

"I do not blame you... - he has calmed down a little. His voice is shaking and I feel sorry for him...- I just.. I just can't bear this any more...."

"Okay, okay.  Let's go back inside. Have a cup of coffee. We'll make it through. But do not say anything rebellious inside, ok?"

And Fish boy nodes as he agrees. Traitor puts his arm on his shoulders and they enters the building. It takes some time to realize the things I just heard. The traitor took him here,  cause no one could hear them. Of course, he could not guess that a girl would be here, behind the tree.

And he is not like the rest of the career  tributes. Fish boy is not one of them! He is not a toy of Panem. I liked the things I heard don't know the reason. All I can think is that he is not like them.

Note of the author: but he is exactly like them, Katniss.  I am sorry...

Back to the Katniss's story:

Now I look through the door. No one is around and there is not any voice.  I decide to go back to my room. It was enough what I had, even more.. I enter and begin to walk on the way to the room and suddenly I feel a strong hand catching my arm! But who- I see the answer when I turn back. The traitor of district. 4.

"You were behind the tree!"- he says unexpectedly.

"What?" How did he see me?!

"Do not even try. I saw you, "the girl on fire". He smirks and keeps talking:

"Forget everything you heard. If something happens to Finnick, just because of your stupidity, you will pay for it."

"I am not willing to harm him!" My mouth worked before my brain.

"As I expected" he smirks satisfied.

Then he sets me free and goes away with quick steps. I run to my room and lock the door.

I am stupid, stupid, stupid!! what the hell I said! "I am not willing to harm him" ?! Oh really? I will have to kill him after some days! I told this sentence without thinking. But.. it can be true.. maybe I really do not want to harm him.. do I? ...

And what about his answer? Why did he expect me to act like this? And if he knew I was there why didn't he stopped Finnick?

I should not go out tonight.  It was completely wrong decision ...

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Hello!  How was this chapter?:) what do you think about this traitor? What he meant? And idea? PLEASE COMMENT! and I need name for this traitor. Help me me about this. I am very bad about choosing names. I will wait for your suggestions. . Okay? ( remembering TFIOS :)))

AND DO NOT FORGET TO VOTE PLEASE! ☺