Bad Habits | Herophine #1

XX

-Major Changes-

I drove back home, passing Rooted on my way back from Jax's newly abandoned condo, I shook my head and decided not to give it my attention, that's what you're supposed to do with things that mess with your mind, right? I reached a stop light and went for my phone, music always was a good distraction ⁠—not this time I guess⁠— I rolled my eyes at the lyrics coming from the speakers as I let it reach the chorus, it touched my heart, but I couldn't cry. 

No fair
You really know how to make me cry
When you gimme those ocean eyes
I'm scared
I've never fallen from quite this high
Falling into your ocean eyes
Those ocean eyes

I pressed the off button on my stereo, shutting Billie Eilish down altogether, the song was tainted now, the song that made me build my entire world around his, was now a plethora of sadness and corrupted feelings, it took everything in me not to fling my phone out of my car, once in the safety of my home I had one thing in my mind and one thing only, forgetting Jax at all costs and getting him out of my system, if he was brave enough to run away, I had to be brave enough to move on as well. 

Hailey's words rang in my head like one of his many vinyl records, except mine was broken. "I'm so sorry, but I suppose he's moved on, maybe you should too."  I placed my hair up into a bun and changed into sports bra and leggings, I marched into my room ready to demolish that stupid bed, but just as I was about to remove the fitted sheet and slam it into the garbage, the doorbell rang, I opened the door and it was Elijah with Taco Bell and two extra large Baja Blasts, I couldn't help the smile that spread across my face, "Did I ever tell you you're the bestest ever?" 

He walked in closing the door behind himself with his foot, "I mean, you can say it again, but I kinda already knew though." He winked at me making me laugh and handing me the bag. "Nah, I'm just playing, I figured you were hungry, you didn't answer your phone this morning so I figured you were busy." 

I scratched my head. "I was, I ran out quickly and left my phone behind." I lied again not telling him where I went. We scarfed down an assortment of junk that neither River or Logan would probably never approve of and the doorbell rang for a second time. "Ooh! My new bed!" I jumped up excitedly and waltzed over to the door. Nope, It was the flat screen I ordered. "Oh good! Now you don't have to fight Logan over having CNN on all the time, looks like River's problem now." I signed off on the order laughing as Elijah took the forty-two inch behemoth and effortlessly took it up to my room. 

Elijah had an affinity to take things down and put them back together again, furniture, broken things, me, among other things... It came as no surprise he took down my bed in less than thirty minutes, mattress included, we dragged the carcass of what had been my sleeping device for the last three years and gladly placed it on the curb for the garbage truck to take to its rightful place. 

We took my desk out and rearranged what I already had in my room to my convenience, I had tons of space that my new bed would fill, in the end Elijah set up my TV on the stand of my shelved entertainment center, I was happy with my previous paint so pretty much all he did was set up my LED lights, my bed in the middle of my room, underneath my window, my desk to one corner, and the rest of my things were neatly composed. "Wow, you have a proper adult room now." He teased at he vegged out on my bed after we were finished, I sat beside him but my headspace was somewhere else, I took my face in my hands and admitted what I had done. 

"I lied..." I began, turning towards him. "I lied about not taking my phone, I saw your phone call and decided not to answer because if I told you where I was going you'd talk me out of it." I let it out before I changed my mind. He licked his lips slowly and propped himself on his elbows. "Where'd you go?" I spilled the beans, the tea, the soup and any other liquid form of food that was possible to spill. "I went to see Jax, to demand answers." I saw him roll his eyes and shake his head. I let him know Hailey lived in the same building now. "Mmm, Interesting." He mustered, not feeling any type of way about that information. "He left, he's in London now, for God knows how long and my questions will be an eternal riddle, a joke I'll never get to laugh at."