CHARLIE'S CONFESSIONS | C. WEASLEY✓

𝟏.𝟏 𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓣𝓻𝓾𝓽𝓱

It had been three years since the death of Astrid Black, the girl who managed to catch Charlie's attention. They had won the war, but Charlie wasn't happy about it. He wished they could have won the war with Astrid beside him, as his own. Charlie was now at the Burrow, they had rebuilt it and improved it. It was painful being here, this is where Astrid died. The most painful thing was that she died not knowing how much he truly loved her.

"You're writing again." Ron pointed out to Charlie, who only sighed and continued to write. This is the only thing that kept him sane. He left his job at Romania, he wouldn't be able to focus and Dragons needed attention. They were delicate, misunderstood creatures. People thought them evil, murderers, Charlie thought them beautiful, extraterrestrial. "What are you even writing about?" Ron asked, sitting beside him, peeking at the book and seeing a curly a and he knew just there and then, it was for Astrid.

Hermione had told him years ago that Astrid liked Charlie, and that Charlie liked her back but they couldn't be together because Astrid was with Oliver and Charlie thought dragons as Gods. Ron felt bad for Charlie.

"My confessions." Charlie sighed, looking at Ron. "You see Ron, I have a book, in where I write my confessions. And this is it. This is the only thing that reminds me of them Ron."

"You have to forget about them Charlie." Ron pressed. "So you can heal."

"So you're saying that you will forget Fred that easily?" Charlie asked, regretting it when a pang of guilt and sadness struck his heart. It was three years later and the memories still haunted him. "I'm sorry." He whispered.

"Don't be, I deserved it." Ron said and Charlie swallowed hard, flipping back to the very first page where he wrote at least an essay.

"I loved her and she's dead." He sighed, feeling the tears prick his eyes. "Astrid Elladora Black, daughter of Andromeda and Ted Tonks, raised by Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, James Potter and Lily Potter and the little sister of Nymphadora Tonks, making her the second cousin of Draco Malfoy, who she was very close to." Ron looked at him weird as though he was a stalker. Well, in truth he did actually find out every little fact about her. He knew things about her that no one did. "She was friends with Cedric Diggory, who died by the hands of Lord Voldemort, and Oliver Wood, whom she dated up until she died." His voice cracked a little.

"Charlie, this is unhealthy." Ron whispered and Charlie ignored him. This wasn't unhealthy. Ron just doesn't understand, if he knew what it felt like to still love someone who has died, maybe he'll let him be.

"She played Chaser for Slytherin, made it in her second year. Best Slytherin had ever seen since Regulus Black, her cousin whom she referred to as uncle Reg, and Barty Crouch Jr. She became friends with Galileo Van Halen, an old friend of mine. They were close and naturally, I got jealous." Charlie sighed, wiping away the tears. It felt good to let someone finally know about his love for Astrid. "Bloody Leo always got the girls, Tonks was in love with him, Milay loved him and they dated, Ginny had a crush on him, he got Colette pregnant and he bloody fled." Charlie shook his head. "I feared Astrid might be in love with him too."

"But she wasn't was she Charlie?"

"No, she loved Oliver. Not me." He sighed and began reading again. "Thankfully Astrid loved Oliver too much to pay any attention to Leo and that hurt me. All I could think about at work was her, her smile, her face, her eyes, her lips, her body. I wondered what it would feel like having her close to me, I wondered what it would feel like," He swallowed hard. "Being between her legs. Every night, I laid awake, fantasizing about it. And her lips."

"She loved you too. She told Hermione about it." The truth felt like knives stabbing him, he didn't know why though. But Astrid loved him. He loved her. No, he still loves her. Why did the world have to be so cruel? "Mum wants me to tell you dinner's ready." Ron stood up and left, leaving Charlie crying. Astrid loved him, he loves her, wasn't that enough to save her? Sometimes, he wished life was a movie, where he could hit stop and rewind so he can save Astrid, tell her how he felt, kiss her, explore every nook and cranny of her body, take in all its pale glory. Life was cruel.

❃❃❃

Charlie sat on the banks of a river, he didn't know where he was but the view was amazing. He could see a head pop up from the water and the face smiled at him. He felt a smile form on his lips.

"The water's great Charlie! Come on!" He knew this woman. It was Astrid. He had been having dreams if her since the night she died. In some they had a family, in some she was dying, in some they were making love and he could feel everything. Her hot breath on his neck, her warm skin under his fingertips and her warm lips against his. He could feel everything, how good it would've felt making love to her.

Charlie quickly took his shirt off and jumped in after her, slightly shivering as he swam up to her. Astrid swung her wet arms around his neck and he slightly shivered.

Then they suddenly in the house, Charlie on top of Astrid and kissing her. It felt good and he didn't want to wake up, but he knew sooner or later, he would have to.

So Charlie whispered in her ear what he whispered all those moons ago the night she died. "I love you."

Charlie woke up to hear people shouting downstairs and he quickly ran down the stairs, after changing into a clean pair of clothes. Ginny was busy throwing hexes and jinxes at Hermione, who easily deflected them. Ron was trying to calm Ginny down, while Harry paced behind Hermione, fingers in his hair.

"Charlie! A little help would be great!" Ron yelled when his eyes landed on Charlie, who was confused. What in Merlin's name happened?

"What happened?" Charlie asked and Ginny stopped hexing Hermione. She spun around to face Charlie.

"Hermione spread her legs for my boyfriend that's what happened!" She had been crying. Charlie remembered when she was only ten, he had already graduated by then from Hogwarts, she had learned that Leo and Milay were an item. She had cried herself to sleep. And when she went, Leo graduated, thankfully.

"That's not what happened Ginny, if you'll only let me explain." Hermione calmly said, and how she was calm, baffled Charlie. He could see one spell had hit her and she was bleeding from her forearm. She didn't seem to notice though.

"Explain then!" Ginny bellowed and Charlie moved to calm her down. Ginny relaxed under his touch and she sniffed.

"Well, you see," Hermione said, tucking her wand away. "It all began with Ron."