Sheogorath x Champion (Reader): The fall into madness (requests included)

Request by Sweet_Lofi

Dispite this being a request, I'm pretty sure I turned it into a crackfic XD. I hope it's okay for you and I'm sorry that it isn't long, I was really stumped and this was the best I could do to keep it shy and innocent (if possible).

Also, I'm beginning to think I should make a new book for any Elder Scrolls/Online characters, let me know what you think in the comments. ENJOY!

Scene: His shrine in a forest.

Mortals were always unpredictable, but predictable when under certain situations, he enjoyed both. But for all his trickery, madness, and mayhem. He could not predict someone like you.

At first glance you were boring, staying to the walls. Or trees in this case. And not talking to anyone on HIS special day of the year, and when you were put on the spot, you would talk as quiet as a mouse. Good grief, Haskill was louder compared to you, and he spoke in one long, drone tone.

He'd have more conversation with a mouse's fart if it could talk.

And this was just your shy nature, it wasn't until he saw just how much of an innocent mortal you were that he practically danced on his tippy toes until it started raining cats and dogs. Literally.

A completely innocent and pure soul that was ripe for the taking, to cradle in his arms as he fed it the madness only he was capable of. If he had believed in fairy tales. He would have thought he had found his soul-mate if he believed in that sort of thing. BUTTERFLIES!

And then at the right time, for them to summon him, he decided to have a little fun. The shrine created a thick fog around them, stopping them from seeing what was in front of them, including you.

He moved with the fog, unseeing, quiet. Which was completely unlike him. But you know the saying, he was the 'calm before the storm'.

He moved until he was right behind you, the smirk on his face grew until it could practically split him in half, and sprout flowers that ate human organs.

And the second he wrapped his arms around your waist, you let out the loudest squeak that made a mouse's look stupid, he couldn't help but cackle in joy.

"Are you a mouse in disguise, because I have a cat that's hungry" he whispered menacingly in your ear before letting go and float around your form so that he could look you in the eye, all the while wearing a big smirk on his face.

"N-no I'm not, y-you just s-startled m-me is all" you stuttered.

He was certain his body went into the same state as when he held Forkey. He missed Forkey.

"I couldn't help but wonder why new blood such as yourself, would be here of all days, just to me moi" he placed a hand over his heart with his most innocent look he could muster "are you here to see the music?"

You shifted uncomfortably and didn't look him in the eye. Good Daedre in Oblivion he hadn't even started his fun yet and already you were on edge, he didn't know whether to call it an achievement or disappointment.

He settled for a pouting look "oh come on, do I really look like some frightening monster/Daedre that wants to chaff your liver and squeeze the jelly from your eyes so I can have it on toast?" he paused for a moment and began to drift in thought "actually the jelly is good on toast"

He was certain your face went even paler with every word he spoke. He mentally danced. But he cackled in your face "oh don't worry lass/ie I was just messing with ya, you intrigue me, most mortals are more, let's say wild when they visit my temple in the woods, oh boy, Uncle Leo would be proud with this, maybe" he shrugged.

He continued to look uninterested as the fog began to dissipate, making sure that only you could see him and you and no one else could.

"Uncle Leo? Is he a family member?" you finally managed to look at him again tilted your head like an animal about to get its head bitten off.

"Of a sort, he gets removed from the family a few times but he always comes back asking for more treats" he shrugged again.

"Could you tell me more about him?" now he noticed your eyes sparkling with life, interest.

Perfect. A mortal after his own heart.

"Uncle Leo was a Nord that lived in Skyrim, quite popular with the ladies from Eastmarch to Windhelm, as the years went by, it got harder and harder for him to... you know" he waved his hands in an uncomfortable gesture. As if continuing would make him word vomit.

What he didn't predict was for you to look at him as if you had no idea what he was talking about "I'm afraid I don't" was your reply.

By Oblivion, how could someone be naive to not understand what intimacy was? You were old enough to know surely, at least in mortal standards.

"Never mind that then, that's beside the point" he waved his hands again "anyway, it started to drive him a little bit batty, and being the kind Prince I am, I came to his aid, can't have someone like Uncle Leo walking about without love right?" he didn't wait for a reply as he continued "I proposed to him a little deal, I gave him back his looks and youth, and all he had to do was never bed a maiden twice" his eyes went dark and he purred his next words deeply "and he took the deal with gusto, it went on for a few years until he met, Miol" he chuckled deeply as if remembering a dark joke.

"H-he f-fell in l-love?" you asked quietly.

He exclaimed "Cheese for the smart skeever, the guy thought he could move out of our deal if he married her" he shook his head and answered in a child-like reply "nope, his face, melted on the night of their honeymoon, and now?" he chuckled darkly in a childish manner "all his girlfriends are RATS!" he howled in delight.

"T-that doesn't s-seem v-very nice" you murmured as you shifted away from him.

"Oh come on, can't you take a joke? Wait, scratch that, no mortal does when I'm involved, apparently" he crossed his arms and looked away "well if that's how you want it to be, have a nice sleep" he walked away to the group crowding around his shrine.

He shifted into a purple and yellow swarm of butterflies and re-formed onto the shrine, sitting on the edge, legs crossed with his staff laying perfectly balanced on his lap. He spread his arms out to all his followers and shouted with the biggest grin on his face.

"CHEESE FOR EVERYONE!"

You wake up in your bed, to find your room covered in cheese from the bed to the floor, a note laying innocently on the bedside table.

'Uncle Leo says'

So it wasn't a dream, was it?